The Disgusting Alcoholic Beverage (DAB, perhaps) seems to be having a moment. Alie Ward and Georgia Hardstark have achieved minor Internet fame — and now a Times writeup — for their McNuggetini, a chocolate shake with vanilla vodka, barbecue sauce on the rim, and a chicken McNugget garnish. They've also cooked up such upsetting concoctions as the Ham Daiquiri and the Bloody Bacon and Cheese. And they're not alone — bacon has now infiltrated both cocktails and beer. These DABs all wear their grossness with pride — they aim to be, if not players in what's supposedly the current cocktail revolution, at least an entertaining sideshow. But as anyone who's ever tried to drink before the legal drinking age knows, the true DAB is born of desperation — when there's no decent alcohol around, and no reliable means to purchase it, and all you have are your wits and some liquids that really shouldn't be mixed.

The grossest drink that ever passed my lips was Jager mixed with Red Bull — I know this is semi-popular, but it tasted more like poison than anything I've ever had before or since. My college friends, however, used to try to stretch a dwindling booze supply with a much grosser libation they called "church wine" — Carlo Rossi jug red mixed with Dr. Pepper. This swill actually ate through a paper cup one night while my roommate and I slept — inexplicably, one of us had been unwilling to finish it — trickled into my roommate's underwear drawer, and stained her bra. So I've always associated the Disgusting Alcoholic Beverage with squalid — and booze-stained — high school and college living.

If the rest of the staff is any indication, I'm not far off. Anna's unfavorite drink of all time is "malt liquor beverages with flavoring." While I agree that these are empirically gross, they'll always have a soft spot in my heart for their role at crappy high school parties. Says Margaret, "The only drink underage Wellesley students with no car could construct was a 'screwdriver' made of fake orange juice stolen from the dining hall and vodka that came in a giant plastic jug. Pour in a funky-smelling Nalgene bottle and serve." And in a similar but slightly worse vein, Katy once ran out of other options and decided to melt orange popsicles to mix with vodka. The verdict: "It was horrible." Some, however, had more high-concept, perhaps more McNuggetini-like DABs to report. Sadie says, "I used to know this sweet old lady who loved these vile Finlandia chocolates filled with sweetened Vodka and would always give them to me. One night, my friends and I made a shot from emptying about 15 of them per glass. It was...not good." But the winner, in my opinion, is Dodai, who writes,

my junior high school friend created a "punch" inspired by those chocolate oranges you see during the holidays. this meant: orange juice, mandarin orange slices, and, the kiss of death: KAHLUA. it was vile.

Consider yourselves warned.

Mixing Meaty Cocktails With A Shot Of Celebrity [NYT]

Police launched a campaign last month to warn women of the possible dangers of drinking too much at the office Christmas bash.

Lady Stern said: 'Being drunk is voluntary and people who become drunk are responsible for their actions. It is not the alcohol that commits the rape.

'It is not an excuse. It used to be regarded as such, but it is not an excuse. It is an aggravating factor.'

The Daily Mail illustrates this with a photo of models kissing under a mistletoe. While this may have not been their intention, the throwaway line as well as the choice of accompanying picture serves to trivialize the subject of the article. Instead of focusing on why the task force chose to make such a statement, the Mail talks of "sex breathalyzers" and allows the last word to reinforce that "If a man is responsible for his conduct when drunk, so is a woman." You can guess what the comments are like.

The Guardian (wisely choosing to use a photo of a man drinking) reports the same facts with a slightly different spin. Here, the focus is on a discussion of rape culture in general, and its pervasiveness in where a drinking culture overlaps with discussions of rape and victim blaming. The Guardian includes Lady Stern's full argument which sheds some more light on the intent:

"Being drunk is voluntary and people who become drunk are responsible for their actions. It is not the alcohol that commits the rape. It is not an excuse. It used to be regarded as such, but it is not an excuse . It is an aggravating factor."

Stern said that clear consent had to be obtained for sex regardless of how well couples know each other. A man could not assume a woman's consent.

"I don't think there is any ambiguity. You can't have sex with someone who hasn't said yes and this it. There is no grey area."

The full report is due in February. Hopefully, Lady Stern will also replace the idea that "an absence of no is as good as a yes" with the idea that an actual yes trumps all.

Drunk men who insist on sex 'are rapists and cannot use alcohol as an excuse', says govt. adviser [Daily Mail]
Drunk men who demand sex from partner should be 'treated as rapists' [Guardian]
How Does The Change Happen? [Yes Means Yes]

Economists Gordon Dahl and David Card looked at twelve years of football upsets — losses by teams predicted to win by three or more points. They found that during the regular season, such losses were correlated with an 8% increase in male-initiated partner violence in the hours immediately after the game. Female-on-male violence and child abuse were both unaffected by football losses, but violence against friends and neighbors increased by about the same percentage partner violence did. So essentially, men who just watched their team lose are more likely to beat up lovers and friends.

Catherine Rampell points out on the New York Times Economix blog that other surprising factors contribute to domestic violence, including holidays — partner violence rises 22% on Thanksgiving. And Slate's Ray Fisman cautions that football may not actually cause abuse:

[W]hile a tough loss for the home team may touch off abuse, that doesn't mean football is the root cause of postgame violence. More likely, the loss merely serves to set off an attack that was already waiting to happen. In a world without football, acts of abuse might merely get postponed, only to be brought on later by some other source of anger. In the long term, rather than blaming football, we may be best off focusing on addressing the more fundamental problems underlying abusive relationships.

Mentally healthy people in stable relationships probably don't suddenly assault their spouses because the Steelers lost. But it's worth examining the possible external triggers for abuse — triggers that have nothing to do with a woman being "difficult" or "asking for it." It's also worth noting that for everything that's great about sports fandom — a shared narrative, a sense of camaraderie, just plain fun — athletic culture can sometimes have an element of violence. Anyone who went to a Big Ten school has probably seen a drunken postgame brawl between pissed-off fans, and while this doesn't mean we should condemn football, we might do well to be a little more aware of its after-effects. Part of this awareness might involve encouraging some moderation in tailgating — coverage of Card and Dahl's research doesn't mention it, but I have to wonder if the increased abuse doesn't have something to do with fans getting drunk at 11 a.m. And of course, men and women alike need to speak out against domestic violence — as a group of Australian men are doing tomorrow in honor of the UN Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women. But perhaps in addition to all this, some sports fans need an extra reminder that, as Fisman says, "it's only a game."

Football Upsets Increase Domestic Violence, Study Finds [NYT Economix Blog]
Illegal Contact [Slate]
Males Asked To Speak Out Against Violence [News.com.au]

New York's Steve Fishman tells a depressing tale of denial and rage. On one side is the bereaved Schuler, struggling to go on after the death of his wife and daughter, and on the other is the Bastardi family, two of whose members were killed when Diane Schuler's Winstar struck their TrailBlazer. Mike Bastardi lost his father, Michael Sr., and his brother Guy, and is angry at the whole Schuler family for what he sees as their role in the accident. He says, "They make like it was not even their fault. I think they knew she was drunk and stoned." Bastardi's wife Jeanne is even harsher. She says, "Not even a second have I felt sorry for Danny. This becomes a man you can't hate enough."

Part of the reason the Bastardis are so angry with Schuler is that he won't own up to his wife's guilt. After the crash, he said at a press conference, "She did not drink. She is not an alcoholic. My heart is rested every night. Something medically had to have happened." He's stuck to this story ever since, hiring a private investigator and a lawyer who speculated that a small stroke or abscess might have caused her to suddenly lose judgment and down ten shots of vodka before getting behind the wheel. Not only was his wife not an addict, he says, she was nearly flawless. Though he spoke to the investigator about "ups and downs" in his marriage," he told Fishman, "There were never any downs. Up for twelve years." He says they were "perfect" for each other, she was an "outstanding" mom, and, tellingly, "She never complained. I do; she doesn't."

Diane Schuler's friends also portray her as keeping her feelings — especially negative ones — to herself. One says, "I've never seen her mad or angry," another, "she infrequently talked about personal feelings." She never talked about her parents' divorce, and refused to speak to her mother — some friends even thought her mother was dead. When Fishman asked Danny "how well he really knew" his wife, Danny answered, "She'd talk to me if things came up." His examples: "The house needs painting, the gutters need to be cleaned."

To hear Fishman tell it, the Schulers' story seemed like a long, drawn-out, and bloody example of the consequences of secrets in a marriage. Did Diane Schuler feel pressured to be the perfect mom — Danny mentions her expertise with birthday cards and holiday decorations — and thus keep her substance problems to herself? Did she feel she couldn't confide in her husband because their work schedules meant they were rarely home at the same time? Did her parents' divorce make her feel she couldn't rock the boat in her own marriage? Why didn't her friends know more about her troubles? Probably these questions will never be answered, but if there's a tragic flaw in the whole Schuler saga, it's isolation.

Despite her supposedly close-knit family, Diane Schuler apparently kept herself hidden from everyone. This led not only to her death and the deaths of seven others — it also plunged her husband into denial and the surviving Bastardi's into fruitless anger. They won't be satisfied until he admits guilt; he won't be satisfied until he proves his wife was blameless. It's hard to know how much of this cycle of despair was caused by Diane Schuler's own particular pathology, and how much by an American idea of marriage that often positions the spouse as sole confidant even when, as was the case with the Schulers, that spouse may be physically unavailable. Only one thing is clear: if Schuler had felt able to open up about her own life, she might have avoided destroying countless others.

Image via New York Magazine.

I Dream Of Diane [New York Magazine]

Drinking while pregnant has become almost synonymous with bad motherhood, at least in the U.S., where one glass of wine in a restaurant can send the eyebrows of nearby diners shooting through the roof (yes, I have observed this first hand). Apparently, this is also true in the U.K. In a piece in the Guardian, Catherine Phipps explores the ins and outs of alcohol consumption and the ever-changing guidelines designed to protect the fetus and scare the mother.

The British Department of Health (DOH) currently advises mothers to abstain from drinking entirely, as does the U.S. Center for Disease Control. In response to the question: "Is it okay to drink when pregnant?" the CDC admonishes: "No, there is no safe level of alcohol use during pregnancy. Women who are pregnant or plan on becoming pregnant should refrain from drinking alcohol." However, Phipps points out that this often is, for all practical purposes, often translated as "we don't want you to drink, but if you must, limit it to 1-2 units, once or twice a week." Indeed, the "1-2 units" has become common wisdom. Drinking is a bad idea, but some alcohol is safe. It's just not clear how much.

Phipps points to another piece of official advice, which is rife with contradictions:

It gets muddier - this document (pdf) from the National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence (NICE), doesn't advise total abstinence throughout the nine months. At one point, it recommends not exceeding 1-2 units once or twice a week, and in the next, advises not drinking "more than 7.5 units of alcohol on a single occasion" - couldn't this unnecessary binge drinking warning be taken to imply that drinking up to that amount is fine?

But the government - in both the U.S. and Great Britain - still tells women just say no. Why? Phipps concludes its out of paternalism and basic lack of trust. If women are told not to drink at all, surely they will drink less, right?

Except this has resulted in a strange fanaticism on the part of non-mothers. While most doctors are okay with a drink now and then, bartenders have been known to refuse to serve visibly pregnant women, and strangers have come to think its somehow their job to police a woman's alcohol intake simply because she's with child. According to Phipps, Americans are the worst when it comes to meddlesome behavior. She mentions a restaurant in New York that displays a sign reading: "Pregnant women please do not ask our waiting staff to harm your unborn child by ordering alcohol." Although women in the U.K. feel the pressure, it makes sense that our country, so prone to extremes and dichotomies, would have a particularly difficult time understanding a woman's right to moderation. It is also a disheartening reminder that women are still seen, even when in the throes of motherhood, as somehow child-like and in need of constant guidance. Ultimately, Phipps argues in favor of letting a woman decide for herself — even if that means serving her a gin and tonic. Naturally, we're inclined to agree.

Alcohol And Pregnancy - Conflict And Confusion [Guardian]
Alcohol And Public Health - FAQs [CDC]

The 2LoveMyLips gloss is available in five different "seductive" colors. On the website, the product is described as "sasy (sic) zestful two-in-one lip plumping breath freshening lip gloss, cleverly packaged to include a drink spike detector testing kit!" Tracy Whittaker, managing director of 2LoveMy, says that the date rape kit is easy to use and requires only a single drop of the suspicious drink. "If they turn blue tell your friends immediately and get help from security and the police," she said.

The website describes the design more fully. It seems like the gloss is not actually attached to the drug testing strip, but instead comes with a separate card inside the box. In their mission statement, 2LoveMy explains:

Our primary goal is to promote 2 LOVE MY LIPS as a fashionable brand with a distinctive logo that is easily recognisable to women within our target age group of 16 to 50.

2 LOVE MY LIPS aims to bring safety and beauty to the finger tips of women of all ages. A revolutionary female concept, where women's beauty and safety blend together so transparently that the customer buys beauty and acquires safety almost subliminally.

Something about this rubs me the wrong way. It is great that they want to help women avoid creepy rapist assholes, but it seems a little odd that this is marketed as the merger of beauty and safety. Whittaker says she hopes to sell the gloss in vending machines and bar toilets, the very places, Cosmetics Design notes, that women will need it most. This just seems like an obnoxious way to sell their lip gloss to scared women, who are forced to buy their pricey ($16 plus tax!) product when what they really want is a way to tell whether or not they are in immediate physical danger. Perhaps I'm reading too much into it, but given all the restrictions stated on their website (you cannot use the test with wine, most fruit juices, and the test does not detect Rohypnol), it may just give women a false sense of safety while promoting sales of yet another beauty product we don't really need. In fact, the best thing about 2LoveMyLips is a paragraph on the company's website that advises women to buy their own drinks, throw out any beverages that have been left unattended, and trust their own instincts. But if we do all that, what's the use of the lip gloss?

Date Rape-Preventing Lip Gloss Debuts [Cosmetics Design]
2LoveMyLips [Official Site]

• Iranian police warned shopkeepers today not to use any mannequins with visible curves. Mannequins are also barred from appearing in windows without a headscarf. • In response to an abysmally low conviction rate for reported rapes, British officials have ordered a review of how rape victims are treated by authorities from the moment they report the assault onward. • Elizaveta Mukasei, who, with her husband, Mikhail, spied during the cold war for the KGB, has died at 97. The New York Times calls the Mukaseis "one of the most famous husband-and-wife duos in the history of espionage." • A new study reveals that more adults than previously thought (three out of five) have suffered from depression, anxiety disorders, alcohol addiction or marijuana abuse at some point in their lives. Previous studies had placed the number much lower, but they also did not follow participants over time, which doctors believe has lead to a more accurate picture of American's mental health. • Supreme Court Justice Sonya Sotomayor, who is a Yankees fan, is scheduled to throw out the first pitch on Saturday before New York's game against the Boston Red Sox. • A three-year custody battle over Dexter the pug has finally come to a close. A judge ruled that the dog will spend five weeks at a time with each of his owners. • Swedish female soldiers are demanding that the military provide them with combat-tested bras because the sports bras they're forced to buy unhook too easily. Men are provided with military-issue underwear, but there are no military-issue bras, so women have to buy their own. • According to the Census Bureau, 27% of gay couples say they are in a relationship "akin to husband-and-wife." This number is much higher than the number of gay couples who have been legally married, and analysts say it reflects the couples who would get married if they were granted equal rights. However, there were fewer same-sex couples reported this year than last, but that may be because fewer straight couples checked the wrong box on their forms. • Researchers have found that mice who are fed alcohol at a young age are more likely to make stupid decisions when they reach adulthood. Although this does not mean people who drink as teens grow up to be risk-takers, it does open up the possibility that the two things are related. • Tanning salons generally do not allow minors to visit without parental permission, but once they are in the door, they do not limit the number of tanning sessions allowed, a recent undercover operation found. •  A girls school in Pakistan was the target of another terrorist attack this Tuesday. Authorities believe the building was blown up by Islamist militants. • Researchers say when people are stressed they actually choose less familiar foods rather than "comfort foods." Study participants were asked to rate the level of change in their lives, then choose between American potato chips and British chips with odd flavors like Camembert and plum. Those experiencing more change were more likely to choose the unusual chips. • Australia's parliament will debate a bill that will decide whether two Kenyan woman can stay in the country as refugees, or if they will be forced to return and undergo female genital mutilation. Grace Gichuhi is seeking asylum because the Mungiki sect that killed her mother for refusing FGM wants to murder her for the same reason. She and fellow Kenyan Teresia Ndikaru Muturi both fled the country, but they'll be deported unless the parliament votes to expand refugee protection laws. • Researchers say people who are dieting should beware of naturally skinny friends who eat too much. 210 students participated in experiments in which a thin or overweight researcher ate snacks with them while watching a movie. The subject's portion choices mimicked the researcher's, but they adjusted and took a smaller portion if the researcher was overweight. • British Attorney General Baroness Scotland has been fined £5,000 for employing a housekeeper who wasn't allowed to work in the U.K. She didn't know it when she hired the housekeeper, but didn't keep a copy of her documents as required by law. • More women are murdered by men in Louisiana than anywhere else in the United States, according to a report from the Violence Policy Center. The national rate of women being murdered by men is 1.3 per 100,000, but in 2007 Louisiana's rate was 2.53 per 100,000. Alaska and Wyoming had the second and third highest rates. • A 19-year-old Indian girl confessed that she and her 20-year-old boyfriend strangled seven members of her family who opposed their relationship. They are charged with murdering her mother, father, grandmother, and four other relatives after lacing the family meal with a sedative. The family wouldn't let them marry because they belong to the same gotra, a group descended from a common ancestor. • Ron Paul on his appearance in the film Brüno: "I don't feel good about it because I was the subject of a trick, and nobody likes to be tricked. I understand they're not making a tremendous amount of money off this movie, so maybe the American people aren't as cynical as they assumed." •

Researchers used data from the Nord-Trondelag Health study that included information about the drinking habits and mental health of more than 38,000 participants. They found that those who reported no alcohol consumption during a two-week period were more likely to report depression than moderate drinkers (defined by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services as drinking no more than one drink a day for women, and no more than two for men. Of course, standards may be different in Norway).

The highest risk for depression was found among the group who called themselves "abstainers." Researchers are not sure how to explain this. Indeed, it seems strange that depression would be found among those who do not self medicate with alcohol. We have become used to associating alcoholism with depression, so it is surprising to have abstinence linked to mental illness as well. Researchers also found that 14% of the abstainers had previously been heavy drinkers, which kind of makes sense, but does not explain the connection for the other 86%. The only explanation suggested by the authors of the study is that, in societies where drinking is common, even normal, abstinence may be associated with the socially marginalized, or with particular personality traits that are associated with depression.

But all hope is not lost for the non-drinking depressed folk: Some scientists believe that depression may serve an evolutionary function. Various studies have found that people in a depressed mood are better at solving problems, both social and mathematical. An article published last week in Scientific American expounds on the theory that the tortuous ruminations that characterize the severely depressed may in fact aid in problem solving. The critical thinking involved in depression may have lead our brains to evolve with a predisposition toward sadness. "The capacity to feel presumably helps us solve problems and survive, and is essential for group living, and perhaps inconsolable depression is simply emotional baggage that tags along with the good stuff. Or maybe unhappiness and a tendency towards suicide is the product of the uncontrolled nature of our quicksilver minds," wrote Meredith Small in an article for LiveScience last year.

Alcohol Abstinence Linked To Depression [UPI]
Why Did Evolution Produce Depression [LiveScience]
Depression's Evolutionary Roots [Scientific American]

Brownell, author of Mommy Doesn't Drink Here Anymore, writes in Women's eNews,

Since becoming a mother five years before, I've longed to hang on to a part of myself that isn't smeared in Mommy goo. The part that laughs at parties, looks good in heels and earns a living while spending quality time with loved ones. I want to be the anti-June Cleaver, the un-wife, the un-mother, loving and present, but not invisible or brainless.

And while it is gravely oversimplifying to say this is why I drink, drinking does begin as a bulwark against the onslaught of mama drones, an enjoyable evening ritual, a life raft—cheaper and easier to do with young children than yoga or running. Only later does it become the best part of every day.

If Brownell's experience is any guide, far from keeping women from drinking, the stereotype of the mother as angel in the house may actually drive them to it. For her, drinking was a way of recapturing an old identity, an identity partially erased by society's assumptions that moms are no fun, don't look good in heels, and are brainless.

Cheever (a sober alcoholic whose father John Cheever had alcohol problems too) focuses mainly on America's widespread acceptance of drinking — and, in some situations, even of drinking and driving — but she also offers a telling speculation about Schuler's thought process:

Diane Schuler was a mother of two small children who loaded her own kids and three others into her minivan for a long drive home from a camping trip. Small children, because they are so tied to our hearts, have the ability to drive us crazy with their complaints and carsickness and impatience. (Small kids are special in this regard.) Perhaps to fortify herself for the drive, Schuler reached for vodka and pot, substances she had probably used in the past. It may not seem obvious to someone who has never had a drinking problem, but for a woman whose most reliable support had become alcohol, it could make a kind of sad, twisted sense.

Dealing with kids, Cheever points out, is hard. It's especially hard when your "marriage starts having more bad days than good," as Brownell's and possibly Schuler's did. And for some moms, alcohol can be a refuge from these difficulties. In an old but highly worth-reading article, also in Women's eNews, Gretchen Cook writes that "society has generally stereotyped alcoholics as the guy curled up with his bottle on Skid Row," and this severely hampers efforts to help women like Schuler. Cook talks to Tracey Deschaine, a nurse who has worked in recovery centers and who says that the Alcoholics Anonymous approach most popular for treating alcoholism isn't well-suited to women. She's especially critical of the First Step, which requires AA members to admit powerlessness over alcohol. She tells Cook,

Women have known all along they're powerless, that's part of the reason they fall victim to drugs or alcohol. They need to be told they have power inside them to get well. And in the Fourth Step, you have to go out and emotionally flog yourself. Nobody has to tell women to flog themselves. They do it all the time.

While the idea that all women emotionally flog themselves is a stereotype itself, it's worth noting that AA encourages people to embrace a feeling many women struggle against: the feeling that outside forces control their lives. Some of these outside forces — damaging assumptions about motherhood, lack of readily available childcare help, higher expectations of mothers than of fathers — need to be challenged, not accepted. Only when we recognize that mothers aren't perfect, and that they sometimes use dangerous coping mechanisms to deal with the very real stresses of their lives, will we be able to stop Diane Schuler's tragedy from repeating itself.

"How Could She?" Well, I Have A Theory [Salon]
At First, Drinking Made It Easier to Be a Mom [Women's eNews]
New Research Confirms Alcohol Is Gender-Sensitive [Women's eNews]

Earlier: Why Are We So Shocked When Moms Drive Drunk?

Sarah Haskins in Target Women: Charm School [Current]

Earlier: All Sarah Haskins Posts
Condoms, Cleaning Supplies & Crap: A Q&A With Sarah Haskins

According to Copyranter, Israeli ad agency McCann Digital launched the "Get An Ugly Girlfriend!" site in Hebrew and English along with a Hebrew-only facebook group to promote the fruit-flavored alcoholic beverages.

The site suggests that like Bacardi Breezers, ugly friends come in several different varieties and women can use them to appear more attractive in social situations, such as at the beach:


Or at the mall:

While misogyny is rampant in alcohol advertising, usually those campaigns are aimed at men. It's unclear why advertisers thought showing pictures of women they deem hideous along with degrading comments would make ladies line up for Bacardi.

Get An Ugly Girlfriend!
Bacardi Says The Hot Accessory This Summer Is An "Ugly Girlfriend" [Copyranter]

You know the people I'm talking about, right? The Wine People. The Beer Patrol. The dude who moved off campus junior year and suddenly became an expert in hops but is still about three years away from being an expert in not coming across as a douchebag. Those people. On the other hand, it's never fun to be sitting next to Drunky McDrool who reeks of Natty Light (what up Boston) and says his only specifications for a beer are "A. It gets me drunk, and B. It gets me drunk fast and cheap." Unless he's a really hilarious drunk, and then it's good times for all.

In any case, the Beer People and the Drunky McDrools of the world always seem to represent the two extremes when it comes to those who enjoy, as Jemaine would say, "a nice delicious glass of beer." But what about the ladies, ladies? There are always bullshit articles about "what your drink of choice says about you," and so on, and the marketing of beer towards women seems to be aimed more at light, "sexy" beers that will get you drunk without giving you a gut. In Britain, women seem to be turning away from beer, due to fears of weight gain and the idea that beer is a "manly" drink. Project Eve, a multimillion dollar ad campaign, aims to change the way women view beer....by introducing the concept of "female-friendly" brews.

"We are encouraging women to have a choice," Kristy McCready, MD, tells the Times of London, "We want to listen to women about what they want, get behind what they want and then speak to the licensed trade. We hope to change the landscape of beer." McCready aims to draw women back to beer by introducing "female-friendly" blends using ingredients such as elderberry and elderflower in order to promote beer more as a healthy ale than something one would drink from a funnel. Awesome. Now not only do we have the Beer People and Drunky McDrool, but we have The Girlie Beer Brigade who will scold you for ordering a Yuengling when you should have ordered a female-friendly blend that will undoubtedly be named after a shoe or a purse or a pony. Or maybe they'll just call it "I Can't Believe It's Not Yogurt But It's Still A Female Friendly Source Of Nourishment!"

Like I said, I'm not a huge drinker, but the idea of branding beer as "female-friendly" is a bit gross: do we really need Girlie Beer to give women healthy attitudes about drinking and moderation? Can't women just drink beer because they want to drink beer? Do we have to throw in a ton of ridiculous "female-friendly" ingredients just to push a product? What say you commenters? Are "female-friendly" brews a good way to get women to open up to drinking beer, or is this just another unnecessary attempt to make a few bucks by slapping a "female-friendly" label on something many women happily drink anyway?

Why Don't Women Drink Beer? [Times Of London]

Almost everyone agrees that the "zero-tolerance" policy recommended by U.S. doctors is unduly strict, and in Europe pregnant women are generally allowed a glass or two a week with no foreseeable damage to the fetus. So, sure, plenty of people find forbidding an adult woman the occasional drink to be, in a word, paternalistic. But "medical legal expert" Dr Colin Gavaghan has taken the argument a step further, calling such strictures "sexist" and "ethically dubious."

Gavaghan's point, presumably, is that the medical establishment's unilateral ban on alcohol during pregnancy only affects women. Which is inarguable, except I guess in the case of those sensitive fathers-to-be who like to share every facet of the shared pregnancy and willingly abstain from drinking out of solidarity. "Ethically dubious" refers to a sweeping recommendation made on fairly scant evidence - it's not been proven that very moderate drinking harms the baby - and so might be construed more as "medical ass-covering" than "full disclosure." The second part, we suppose we get. But if it's true, we're gonna go out on a limb and say that these same cautious doctors would probably be just as quick to ban pregnant men from drinking, too.

But, logic - and overly free use of words - aside, isn't there always a degree of paternalism to the regulation of alcohol? Kids can't drink. And it's up to a bartender's discretion to decide when someone has "had enough" - even if that person, is, legally, a consenting adult. Also, let's talk turkey: female drinking is up - especially binge-drinking in the UK - and however paternalistic, there's something to be said for making women aware of the risks of their behavior, if it can be done without unnecessary alarmism. To the extent that Gavaghan's argument rests on "informed choice," then yes, we agree. But he undermines it with his absurd sexism charges - and we rather resent the notion that this might have been intended to sway us, the target demo, with a buzzword. As the New York Times' etiquette columnist put it rather more moderately over the weekend, "There's no law requiring pregnant women to become vestal virgins. And a reasonable mother-to-be is the best judge of her behavior." True, but the fiction that we can live any facet of our public health lives, in the modern age, free of paternalism seems disingenuous - particularly to a "legal expert" who should at least recognize that to some, our society must seem too litigious to be trusted with all the facts.

Telling Pregnant Women Not To Drink Is 'Sexist' [Telegraph]
It's Sexist To Tell Pregnant Women Not To Drink, Says Expert [Daily Mail]
Social Q's: Make Mine a Double [NY Times]

Despite having, according to legend, invented the cocktail, the female bartender has had a hard road. According to a WSJ article on the history of the profession, since the 19th century there have been laws on the books prohibiting women from working behind the bar. Post-war, even more legislation went into effect, including a Michigan prohibition that four female bartenders challenged (unsuccessfully) all the way to the Supreme Court. Female bartenders didn't become legal in California until 1971 - and then only because "a topless bar called Sail'er Inn...wanted to move some dancers behind the bar to mix drinks in dishabille." Indeed, the first wave of 1970s female bartenders were considered a profitable investment but not, as the article says, due to "skills in actually making drinks."

The rationale for excluding women was a combination of cronyism and paternalism. Men wanted the jobs; others didn't want women corrupted by the atmosphere. According to my boyfriend, his grandfather wouldn't let Grandma Minnie anywhere near the saloon he ran for local steelworkers; that the one time she came in she found him fox-trotting with a "floozie" to some hot jukebox jazz may have had a little something to do with it too.

Nowadays, although male bartenders still outnumber their female counterparts, it's largely an open playing field. I queried some of beer-slinging gals I know for their take. One career bartender, Betsy, asserted that "it used to be, like in the 70s, you had two kinds: the sexy girl who got big tips, and the bitch who kept order. Now, I feel like you don't need to play to that." Everyone said there are jerks who regard female bartenders as fair game - "but the flip side of that card is big tips, however philosophically problematic. Way more than male counterparts" - and no one I talked to felt that their sex was problematic in terms of physical stuff like throwing drunks out. "Although once I called for reinforcements on a rowdy night," says on Brooklyn woman. I also wanted to hear their takes on one bartender's assertion in the article that female bartenders employ "a nurturing nature not common to men in the business." "Oh yeah," replied one. "All those tender squeezings of limes." Said Betsy, "in one of the fancy new cocktail bars? Maybe sometimes women have an attention to detail...but whatever, I have ADD, so forget the generalizations, ok? And when it comes to pulling beers, who cares?"

Women Behind Bars [Wall Street Journal]

•  A recent study has found that alcohol has no effect on one's ability to judge age, which is bad news for anyone who wants to claim being drunk as an excuse for sleeping with a minor. Also: alcohol had a "significant impact" on making older faces with a lot of makeup appear more attractive to participants. • A North Carolina State University design team is working on making new, less revealing, and hopefully more comfortable, hospital gowns. • New research suggests that there may be a link between perfectionism and binge eating. • Ever wondered what a pro-abortion diet would look like? World of Wonder has the answer. • Today's New York Times profiles Allannah Thomas, who works with a nonprofit group to help low-income women achieve their full potential through math classes. • Meet Jennifer Fearing, the "rising star" of California's animal rights movement. Despite her fear of birds, Fearing has worked to improve the lives of farm raised chickens across the state. •  Police in Tracy, CA have received dozens of calls from people who simply cannot believe that Melissa Huckaby, as a woman, was capable of raping and murdering someone else's daughter. • Click here to watch a strange and disjointed time-lapse video that explains how babies are really made. • Is Katie Price (more commonly known as Jordan) a feminist icon? We're going with no, but the Times makes an interesting case for the famous glamor model. • More than 20 polo horses died this Sunday in Wellington, Florida. 15 of the horses died instantly, while the rest lingered for almost an hour. Experts are still searching for the cause of death. •

An essay in the New York Times takes on the issue of parental drinking - or, rather, lack thereof. The author, Anna Fricke, is a hard drinker with a long history of alcohol-fueled escapades in her past, all of which come to an abrupt halt when she falls pregnant (as the Brits would have it.)

I felt maternal, wise and frankly relieved. I had worried for years that the alcoholism that ran in my New England stock had snuck into my veins and it was good to know that I could painlessly, easily, give up alcohol when necessary. And so, for 13 months, I didn't touch a drop. And then I had a baby.

Having a baby is, of course, probably as exhausting and draining as it is exhilarating.

I cannot speak for all babies, but at the end of a long day with mine … sometimes I want a drink. Not a large one, not a hard one. Just enough of one to ease the tension of the knotted back that comes with carrying a 20 pound baby around. Enough to quiet the voices that question, "Is she eating enough? Am I promoting her self-confidence? Should we listen to more Mozart and less Death Cab For Cutie? Should I be teaching her sign language? Or Italian?" After months of willingly sacrificing my body and everything that went into it for the well-being of my child, I started to revel in taking a little of myself back. At night, after she was soundly asleep, I would cook my husband and myself dinner and pour a luxurious glass of wine. I sautéed, I sipped. It was just like the good old days.

"Death Cab for Cutie" reference aside (which just makes me wonder what other bands were considered and rejected for the throwaway), this seems completely natural, normal and reasonable. After all, it's well known that American doctors are far more draconian about alcohol consumption than their European counterparts, and even the strictest of pediatricians doesn't begrudge a new mother the occasional glass of wine. And as Fricke observes, it's not even the drinking itself that's at issue:

it's not the alcohol I miss. It's the immaturity. The selfishness. The wasted days frittered away recuperating from the wasted nights. It all turned around so quickly. I wasn't prepared to be this person. A person who can clearly recall all the events of the night before. Who can be the designated driver. Who can go to a work party without apologizing the next day. This must be parenthood. I would toast this milestone, but I have pears to puree.

The essay did leave me wondering, though: why is drinking still the milestone for virtue? Why is it so morally weighted? Like food, why must drinking be burdened by context and judgment, good or evil, abstinence or excess? The very real medical implications aside - and flirting with a family history of alcoholism is not a joke - the phenomenon seems socially unhealthy. If we're going to do the cross-cultural thing, after all, this is not a universal phenomenon, and no study of female binge drinking fails to mention that Europeans - the same cultures that allow for a little wine while nursing or pregnancy - don't, as a rule, indulge in this particular form of excess. It's like in some ways we're still living in the shadow of Prohibition. Maybe if "responsibility" wasn't regarded as so diametric an opposition to freedom, it would seem less scary. Or maybe not. But this much I do know: Fricke needn't be defensive about the occasional glass of wine.

Moderation And The Modern Mom [New York Times]

The Hindu group, called Sri Ram Sena, also denounced Valentine's Day. Some government officials are joining the culture wars — one called shopping malls "havens of hand-holding." But India's women and child development minister criticized Sri Ram Sena's tactics as "Talibanization." Twenty-one-year-old Sanah Galgotia says the debate rages within Indian women as well, that they alternate "between being assertive and subservient and then judging others for tilting one way or the other." "In India," she says, "no matter how modern you are, you're still in this schizophrenic nonmodern thing." She adds, "We are globalized in our lifestyle, but very Indian at heart. I know I am." [NY Times]