Kathleen Sebelius Might Be Running For Senator in Kansas

When Secretary of Health and Human Services Kathleen Sebelius resigned last week, it was seen as an inevitable attempt by the Obama Administration to blame someone for their embarrassingly "botched" roll-out of the Affordable Care Act's healthcare.gov. But Sebelius isn't done yet: she could be considering a run for… » 4/16/14 11:40am Wednesday 11:40am

Sorry, God: Catholic Schoolgirls Use Birth Control

Three anonymous women who attend the University of Notre Dame have been granted the right to intervene in the school's lawsuit against the Affordable Care Act's birth control mandate. The school claims that because the government has declared contraception basic care for women, their right to base other people's health … » 1/17/14 10:00am 1/17/14 10:00am

Latest Obamacare Birth Control Cases Aren't as Bad as They Seem

Though it appeared that birth control-loving Americans had been dealt a swift kick to their genitals with Justice Sonia Sotomayor's decision to grant a temporary delay for some religiously affiliated groups who want exemption from the Affordable Care Act's birth control mandate, the nuance of the call is actually much… » 1/02/14 3:10pm 1/02/14 3:10pm

Justice Sotomayor Pumps the Brakes on the Birth Control Mandate

On the cusp of pressing the reset button on our frenzied Gregorian existence, Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor gave us all a frustrating New Year's Eve surprise by blocking the implementation of that tricky part of the Affordable Care Act that would have forced certain religiously affiliated organizations (ahem,… » 1/01/14 12:00pm 1/01/14 12:00pm

Michele Bachmann Claims She Lost Her Insurance Because THANKS OBAMA

Yesterday, Congressman and world's foremost authority on being a hateread made flesh Michele Bachmann appeared on CNN to discuss her favorite topic, "Obama Bad. More like Nobama (sits back crossing arms, raises eyebrows smugly)." During her appearance opposite strategist Paul Begala, she claimed that thanks to Obama… » 11/15/13 12:20pm 11/15/13 12:20pm

This Is the Week the US Government Told Poor Women to Fuck Off

Know what's even scarier than stumbling into a Walgreens at 3 am and witnessing a woman dressed as Miley Cyrus puking on a guy dressed up as Jesse Pinkman as a muzakal rendition of Silent Night plays over the loudspeaker? What conservatives in the government are doing — and have done — to low income women this week.… » 11/01/13 4:20pm 11/01/13 4:20pm

Jon Stewart's Latest 'Fuck You' Is So Big It Needs a Gospel Choir

Did you hear? The website glitches on the Obamacare enrollment site are so terrible that even Jon Stewart has turned against the White House. EVEN JON STEWART. Cancel it! Cancel it all! Cancel healthcare both public and private! CANCEL HEALTH IN GENERAL! All because Jon Stewart says something is lame. » 11/01/13 11:30am 11/01/13 11:30am

John Stossel: Women Are Hypochondriacs, Should Pay More for Healthcare

The fleshy casing for a sentient mustache that calls itself John Stossel offered up some brilliant social commentary on Fox & Friends this morning. In yet another fucking segment on conservative Obamacare fee-fees (because the segments will not stop until every conservative has been interviewed individually!), Stossel… » 10/31/13 8:30pm 10/31/13 8:30pm

Better Birth Control Could Save Taxpayers $12.5 Billion Per Year

These days, you can't swing an IUD around the US Capitol rotunda without hitting at least one politician who claims Americans are Taxed Enough Already!111! and in the same breath claim that both birth control and abortion are goddamn abominations (one of those politicians ran for Vice President last year!). Turns out,… » 10/23/13 1:20pm 10/23/13 1:20pm

Noted Hero Barack Obama Just Caught a Fainting Pregnant Lady

Earlier this afternoon, President Obama gave a speech on the egregious errors people are encountering as they attempt to enroll in healthcare coverage via Healthcare.gov from the Rose Garden at the White House . His statement was interrupted, however, when the pregnant woman standing behind him began to sway and… » 10/21/13 3:55pm 10/21/13 3:55pm

Government Will Stay Closed For As Long As It Takes to Eradicate Sluts

Now that the government shutdown is in what feels like it elevendieth week, everything seems too stupid to be real, and here's a perfect example of why: the GOP's continued insistence that the United States government remain in stinky, stale deadlock until liberals agree to allow business owners to bar the sluts who… » 10/15/13 7:20pm 10/15/13 7:20pm

Gretchen Carlson Explores the Suspicious Obamacare/Cosmo Connection

Just three days into her new show The Real Story on Fox News where she's trying to "hold everyone's feet to the fire," Gretchen Carlson pulled out the big guns by hosting a "power panel of women" that included former Real Housewife of New York Jill Zarin and new Miss America Nina Davuluri. The women decided to tackle the… » 10/03/13 3:40pm 10/03/13 3:40pm

Who's Really to Blame for the Looming Government Shutdown? Sluts.

And they say that in 2013 women still don't have any power. Behold, the US government, steward of the most powerful and wealthy country in the world, is about to be brought to its knees by a group of post-fertile conservatives who, more than anything, fear a loosening of their demographic's grip over the choices of… » 9/30/13 12:40pm 9/30/13 12:40pm

Conservative Whining About Whore Pills Might Go to the Supreme Court

As we approach the date of the implementation of the biggest, bulkiest piece of Obamacare and (if you ask a Tea Partier) THE END OF FREEDOM AND LIBERTY FOREVER BENGAZI!, lawsuits protesting the Affordable Care Act's birth control mandate continue to push their way through the the sluggish peristalsis of the court… » 9/20/13 1:20pm 9/20/13 1:20pm

Ironic as Hell GOP Ad Says The Government Should Stay Out Of Your Vag

Now that Obamacare's implementation is all but inevitable, conservatives are doing all sorts of nutty shit to try to stop it at the last minute. They're threatening to shut down the whole government over it, which is the political equivalent of cutting off one's head to spite one's face. They're filing a metric crapton … » 9/19/13 1:30pm 9/19/13 1:30pm

Planned Parenthood Wants to Help You Sign Up for Obamacare

The landing page for Planned Parenthood's Affordable Care Act help site is now live: sign up for email updates! The full site will launch later this month with a guide for women to use while searching for insurance coverage in the marketplace. Until then, check out the explainer we ran in August. » 9/11/13 3:10pm 9/11/13 3:10pm