... footnotes!

Feb. 2008

Cindy

This is the most important letter I've ever written [1]. What I did with you was wrong. I was completely self-centered + only thinking of myself [2]. I used you for my own pleasure [3], not letting thoughts of you, Doug [childrens' names] come into my mind...I betrayed everything I believed in [4] and lied to myself over + over. I justified my actions because I blamed my wife.

Doug has been a great friend to me through the years [5] + I threw all of that away over wanting to feel good.

I take 100 % responsibility for my actions, plain + simple it was wrong; it was sin. God never intended for me to do this. I walked away from Him and my relationship with Him has suffered terribly. I know He loves me and He loves you. He wants to restore Doug and you [6].

More than that He wants to restore our relationships to Him [7].

Sincerely,

John

1. This letter shares its opening line with three other Ensign correspondences: a letter to the General Mills Co. complaining about Lucky Charms cereal (not "lucky"), a 1998 Christmas newsletter detailing the soccer accomplishments of Ensign's three children, and a 1968 Valentine to which we will refer henceforth as "Lindsey Jameson I lllllove you!"
2. The repeated use of the plus-sign is consistent with the typography of "Lindsey Jameson I lllllove you!" and helps to authenticate the letter. The only other possible writer is Las Vegas fourth-grader Jessica Arnold, whose connection to Cynthia Hampton has not been established.
3. It has been alleged that Cynthia Hampton is in fact an inanimate object. This view is bolstered by Doug Hampton's suggestion that his wife was "was powerless to prevent the continuing affair." Our own Megan Carpentier reports that Cynthia Hampton "has no autonomy or sexual desires of her own." Though no official photographs of Ms. Hampton have been released, rival paparazzi have snapped this and this.
4. Unlike the closing line of "Lindsey Jameson I lllllove you!" ("I will love you for ever and ever and never forget you"), this statement is actually true. Ensign's coveting of his neighbor's wife is at odds with his membership in the Promise Keepers organization, and his 2004 statement in support of the Federal Marriage Amendment: "Marriage is the cornerstone on which our society was founded. For those who say that the Constitution is so sacred that we cannot or should not adopt the Federal Marriage Amendment, I would simply point out that marriage, and the sanctity of that institution, predates the American Constitution and the founding of our nation." Ensign also called for Bill Clinton's resignation in 1998, saying that after an affair with employee Monica Lewinsky, "He has no credibility left."
5. "Through the years" here apparently means "until the affair," after which point Doug Hampton tried to take Ensign to court, and, when that didn't work, gave the story to FOX News and may have begun a campaign of extortion.
6. God apparently enacted his plan of restoration via his agents, Oklahoma Senator Tom Coburn and other Washington conservatives. Acting on behalf of God, Coburn suggested that Ensign pay the Hamptons in excess of $1 million so they could pay off their mortgage and moved to Colorado. This form of penance is found in Ecclesiastes 4:15, "whosoever shall covet his neighbor's wife, if he be a senator, shall pay for this wife to move to a Western state popular with both hippies and Christians."
7. In response to this, God wrote, "Whatever. You did not come through with the $$$ + Colorado thing. Going to FOX."

Ensign "Letter" To Mistress: I Used You For "Pleasure" [Politico]
Sen. John Ensign, Mistress' Husband Point Fingers At Each Other [LA Times]
Hampton Speaks Publicly, Says Ensign Paid Severance [Las Vegas Sun]

Earlier: Husband Of Senator's Mistress Will Go To Any Lengths To Get Revenge

From: Mark Sanford

To: Maria

Date: Fri, 4 Jul 2008 03:09:44 +0000

Dearest,

You are glorious and I hope you really understand that. You do not need a therapist to help you figure your place in the world [1]. You are special and unique and fabulous in a whole host of ways that are worth a much longer conversation. To be continued ... [2]

Have been having a few email problems as I am getting email through an aircard at the farm, where access to computer world is more than tough [3]. Please let me know if you have gotten my last two eamils (sic) [4]so I know it is working in getting to your part of the world ...

Another glorious day outside. Hope you are doing well, and am anxious to hear about your week. Know that I miss you. Unbeleivably (sic) hard to imagine it has been a week [5]. Please also send your mailing address as I want to send you an insignificant something next week when I am back in civilization that I think you might find interesting given our conversation.

Want to write an indepth note with some thoughts on our visit when I know you are getting these emails. Hugs and much love. M

1. Here the speaker asserts himself as an expert in mental health, an assertion rendered highly dubious by the rest of the text.
2. Perhaps a reference to a phrase commonly displayed at the end of a variety of contemporary television program known as the "soap opera," a type of program which this text resembles in other ways.
3. The speaker attempts to make himself sound "rugged," an impression belied by the fact that he knows what an aircard is, and has one on his "farm."
4. The State's decision to draw attention to every one of the speaker's misspellings with the use of the word sic is both a source of humor in this text and a reminder to the audience to spellcheck e-mails lest they be made public as part of an international sex scandal.
5. The speaker's distorted concept of time foreshadows other cognitive distortions.

From:

To:

Subject: RE:

Date: Tue, 8 Jul 2008 01:42:46 -0400

Beloved back to you...

Got back an hour ago to civilization and am now in Columbia after what was for me a glorious break from reality down at the farm [6]. No phones ringing and tangible evidence of a day's labors. Though I have started every day by 6 this morning woke at 4:30, I guess since my body knew it was the last day, and I went out and ran the excavator with lights until the sun came up. To me, and I suspect no one else on earth, there is something wonderful about listening to country music playing in the cab, air conditioner running, the hum of a huge diesel engine in the background, the tranquility that comes with being in a virtual wilderness of trees and marsh, the day breaking and vibrant pink coming alive in the morning clouds - and getting to build something with each scoop of dirt [7]. It is admittedly weird but one of my more favorite ways of escaping the norms, constant phone calls and formalities that go with the office - and it probably fits with my weakness in doing rather than being - though you opened up a new chapter last week wherein I was happy and content just being [8]. Last point worth further discussion. Afternoon projects had me outside and by days (sic) end I pretty much looked like a homeless person ... but in this case a very content one. Enough about my love of heavy equipment and woods at sunrise ...

While I was getting exhausted with one project after another at Coosaw work week, you were basking (I'm certain gloriously) on the beach..

Sounds great, hope to hear more about what sounds a great spot.

Will now finally get some sleep and write you a longer note with a few more profound thoughts tomorrow or Wednesday. In the meantime I send my love and hope you know I am thinking of you.. M

P.S. I do not want to raise expectations, when I say I will send something insignificant I promise I will do as I say! It wont (sic) be worthy of bedside placement ... was just going to find the movie the Holiday as we had spoken of it last Thursday. Its music was pleasant and made me think of you - its mood and the notion of a holiday (wrapped up in our case over two days) certainly fit as well [9] ... (though our visit in some ways for me was as well less of a holiday than it was uncovering and realization of some things and feelings that again are worth longer conversation)

Had also hoped to find the cd of a song that played as I was flying home and also20made (sic) [10] me think of you. Who knows if I can find the music ... so all you may be stuck with is a long released movie - and if you put it by your bed I really be worried! Love you, good night and kisses back to you ...

6. The speaker repeatedly refers to the dichotomy between civilization/reality and the "farm," revealing his ignorance of the fact that rural environments are, metaphysically speaking, "real."
7. More "ruggedness" (see [3]). The "country music," the "excavator," the "scoop of dirt" are all signifiers of a particular group of conservative American values. Interestingly, these values include marital fidelity.
8. Psychobabble. Perhaps related to the speaker's earlier assertion of psychiatric expertise. Studies show that the use of such psychobabble is inversely proportional to the actual mental health of the user.
9. The comparison with the movie The Holiday appears to be a variant on a phenomenon usually found in adolescents, commonly known as "thinking every song is about your love."
10. In numerology, the number 20 means "I am about to throw away a promising political career for an ill-advised extramarital affair." This may be significant.

From: Mark Sanford

To: Maria

Subject: RE:

Date: Thu, 10 Jul 2008 00:24:54 -0400

Sweetest,

It was indeed a long day. I am most jealous of your salad under the palm tree [11].

Three thoughts in one note now that I have a moment [12]. One the travel schedule is about to get real busy (and this distresses me for the way it may well make it more difficult to get your notes over the next few weeks), two unfortunately all the feelings you describe are mutual, and three where do we go from here?

One, tomorrow leave at 5 am for New York and meetings. Will think about you on its streets and wish I was going to be there later in the month when you are there. Tomorrow night back to Philadelphia for the start of the National Governor's Conference through the weekend. Back to Columbia for Tuesday and then on Wednesday, as I think I had told you, taking the family to China, Tibet, Nepal, India, Thailand and then back through Hong Kong on world wind tour [13]. Few days home then to Bahamas for 5 days on a friends boat for the last break of the summer. The following weekend have been asked to spend it out in Aspen, Colorado with McCain - which has kicked up the whole VP talk all over again in the press back home.

Two, mutual feelings. I have been specializing in staying focused on decisions and actions of the head for a long time now [14] - and you have my heart. You have oh so many attributes that pulls it in this direction. Do you really comprehend how beautiful your smile is? Have you been told lately how warm your eyes are and how they softly glow with the special nature of your soul. I remember Jenny, or someone close to me, once commenting that while my mom was pleasant and warm it was sad she had never accomplished anything of significance. I replied that they were wrong because she had the ultimate of all gifts - and that was the ability to love unconditionally. The rarest of all commodities in this world is love. It is that thing that we all yearn for at some level - to be simply loved unconditionally for nothing more than who we are - not what we can get, give or become. There are but 50 governors in my country and outside of the top spot, this is as high as you can go in the area I have invested the last 15 years of my life - my getting here came as no small measure because I had that foundation of love and support so critical to getting up in the morning and feeling you could give and risk because you already had a full tank of love in the emotional bank account [15]. Since our first meeting there in a wind swept somewhat open air dance spot in Punta del Este, I felt that you had that same rare attribute. Above all else I love that inner beauty about you. That gift of yours is going to make a tremendous difference in (The State deleted sons' names) life - and in anyone's life who is blest to be touched by yours - you need to rest very comfortably in that fact. As I mentioned in our last visit, while I did not need love fifteen years ago - as the battle scars of life and aging and politics have worn on this has become a real need of mine. You have a particular grace and calm that I adore. You have a level of sophistication that is so fitting with your beauty. I could digress and say that you have the ability to give magnificently gentle kisses, or that I love your tan lines or that I love the curves of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) [16] in the faded glow of night's light - but hey, that would be going into the sexual details we spoke of at the steakhouse at dinner - and unlike you I would never do that!

Three and finally, while all the things above are all too true - at the same time we are in a hopelessly - or as you put it impossible - or how about combine and simply say hopelessly impossible situation of love. How in the world this lightening strike snuck up on us I am still not quite sure [17]. As I have said to you before I certainly had a special feeling about you from the first time we met, but these feelings were contained and I genuinely enjoyed our special friendship and the comparing of all too many personal notes (and yes this is true even if you did occasionally tantalize me with sexual details over the years!) - but it was all safe. Where we are is not. I have thought about it and in some ways feel I let you down in letting these complications come into a friendship that I hope will last till death. In all my life I have lived by a code of honor and at a variety of levels know I have crossed lines I would have never imagined. I wish I could wish it away, but this soul-mate feel I alluded too is real and in that regard I sure don't want to be the person complicating your life. I looked to where I often look for advice and counsel, and in I Corinthians 13 it simply says that, " Love is patient and kind, love is not jealous or boastful, it is not arrogant or rude, Love does not insist on its own way, it is not irritable or resentful, it does not rejoice in the wrong, but rejoices in the right, Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things and endures all things" [18]. In this regard it is action that goes well beyond the emotion of today or tomorrow and in this light I want to look for ways to show love in helping you to live a better - not more complicated life. I want to help (one of Maria's sons) with film guys that might help his career, etc. I also don't want you walking20away (sic) [19] from some guy (I take it the younger guy you mentioned a t dinner) because of me - and what we both have to see as an impossible situation. I better stop now least this really sound like the Thornbirds - wherein I was always upset with Richard Chamberlain for not dropping his ambitions and running into Maggie's arms. The bottom line is two fold, my heart wants me to get on a plane tonight and to be in your loving arms - my head is saying how do we put the Genie back in the bottle because I sure don't want to be encumbering you, or your options or your life [20]. Put differently, given I love you, I don't want to be part of the reason you are having less than an ideal week in what sounds like a cool spot.

Lastly I also suspect I feel a little vulnerable because this is ground I have never certainly never covered before - so if you have pearls of wisdom on how we figure all this out please let me know ... In the meantime please sleep soundly knowing that despite the best efforts of my head my heart cries out for you, your voice, your body, the touch of your lips, the touch of your finger tips and an even deeper connection to your soul. I love you ... sleep tight. M

PS. I will make it a point in NY tomorrow to drop by a store and get that movie I promised to send your way ... I am encouraged to know you will not keep it beside the bed least we have tangible evidence of two pathetic figures missing each other far too much to live a few thousand miles apart!

11. A lesser-known sex position.
12. Many more than three thoughts are expressed in this "note." Interestingly, none of these thoughts involve the imprudence of sending said note at all, or the possibility that it could fall into the wrong hands.
13. Presumably the speaker means a "whirlwind tour," and not a tour of the world's winds. The State did not mark this mistake, probably due to fatigue.
14. The content of the text calls into question whether the speaker was ever truly a specialist in this area.
15. Here the speaker reveals he is also not a specialist in metaphor. Readers should be warned of the dangers of putting gas in one's bank account, or love in one's gas tank.
16. It is tempting to assume that the speaker is referring to his lover's breasts, but he may also mean her ass and her elbow, or her duodenum and her spleen. All these body parts are involved in the "salad under the palm tree" position.
17. The speaker is referencing a common South Carolina weather phenomenon, "sneaky lightning." It occurs in mid-summer, during drops in barometric pressure, and "when you least expect it."
18. It is telling that the speaker chooses to reproduce this Bible verse, and not Exodus 20:14, " Thou shalt not commit adultery."
19. Another numerological interpretation of the number 20 is "I write really long rambling e-mails."
20. At this point the number of props and characters in this text has grown so large as to be almost unmanageable. No doubt the effort of mentally juggling an excavator, the Bible, John McCain, his lover's breasts, his mother, The Holiday, the characters in The Thorn Birds, a bank account full of gas, and a genie caused the speaker to commit errors in judgment that he, with his avowed concern for the mental health of others, ordinarily never would have committed.

Exclusive: Read E-mails Between Sanford, Woman [The State]
Maria [Politico]

We wrote about AshleyMadison.com last year, but since the site is open to wives and husbands looking to cheat on their spouse, we never thought to focus on the minority of women who use the site. Maybe it's because cheating wasn't invented back then. As anonymous adulteress "Deeana" explains in the clip at left, "before the internet people just struggled through their marriages."

The man, known by his last name Fan, couldn't afford to support so many mistresses so he had the women compete in categories of appearance, singing, and how much alcohol they could hold. The winner would remain his mistress and receive $800 per month and an apartment. A 29-year-old woman, identified as Yu, was eliminated in the appearance round. She invited Fan and the other women to accompany her on a sight seeing trip and drove the car off a cliff, killing herself and injuring the others. Fan shut down his company and paid Yu's parents $85,000. The mistresses and Fan's wife left him. [CNN, Time]

[Image via Stock Exchange]

Edwards reportedly hired Hunter in 2006 to produce a series of films about his candidacy before he was actually a candidate  after meeting her in a bar. She didn't exactly have a lot of video production experience. By last September, the videos were scrubbed from the website, and more salacious rumors about him began making the rounds. In December, the National Enquirer came out with its first story that Rielle Hunter was pregnant and that she and Young were claiming to have had the affair. But in January, Page Six published a blind item that, in retrospect, indicates that she was claiming to still be having an affair with Edwards. Rielle's daughter was born February 27, 2008, placing the child's conception around April 2007.

The videos Hunter made for Edwards (and about which she was quoted) were released around New Year's 2006. Is it possible that the affair ended in 2006 while she was still giving press quotes? And that he'd, as he says now, already told Elizabeth? No one noticed the videos were scrubbed until last summer 2007, which is about the time Hunter would've been discovering she was pregnant (and telling people, and showing).

Elizabeth Edwards, by the way, announced that her cancer had come out of remission in March 2007  about a month before Rielle would've gotten pregnant, supposedly by Andrew Young.

Frankly, I think Edwards is still lying. No one wants to believe he was having sex with a woman he'd hired to work for his campaign, or that he was doing so after his wife announced that she had cancer, so few people are going to question the timing. The story that he cracked Elizabeth's ribs "hugging" her (with the innuendo being while they were having sex) last winter and that's how they discovered the cancer seems a little more... unseemly now, doesn't it? Were they having make-up sex? Or was he still sleeping with his (soon-to-be immunocomprised) wife while having condomless sex with his mistress who he didn't even love?

John Edwards' political appeal relied on a couple of things: his ability to get $400 haircuts while relatively convincingly playing the son-of-a-mill-worker concerned with economic inequality in America; and his ability to be a very attractive politician with a lovely but considered by some to be less-attractive wife with whom he seemed to have a healthy and affectionate relationship. What does he have now? A hippie pregnant mistress from whom, if she openly claims it's his child, he'll demand a paternity test? A mistress that he was (knowingly or not) "sharing" with his staffers while his wife was developing cancer? There's no way to come out ahead of this story, and prevaricating on the timing doesn't help.

There's no way an Obama Administration can nominate him as AG, let alone appoint him to anything that requires Congressional approval. This is the end of the line for John Edwards and his political career, and it should be. Keeping your dick in your pants doesn't require training, just a brain.

Edwards Admits Sexual Affair; Lied as Presidential Candidate [ABC News]
Did John Edwards Sleep With This Lady? [Wonkette]
Enquirer Reports: Rielle with Someone’s Child [Updated] [Wonkette]
Edwards Mystery: Innocuous Videos Suddenly Shrouded In Secrecy [HuffPo]
Scrubbed: Edwards Filmmaker's Deleted Website Raises Questions [HuffPo]
Just Asking [Page Six]
Birth Certificate Of Child Linked To Edwards Lists No Father [McClatchy]
Politics 2008: John Edwards, Untucked [Newsweek]
Elizabeth Edwards's Cancer Returns – but Campaign Goes on [People]
Can We Talk Politics, Please? [NY Times]