Why should today's #teens opt for Aéropostale (remember Aéropostale?) as opposed to one of their umpteen million fast-fashion options? Because their clothes are "safe" and you won't get relentlessly mocked for your fashion choices. Or at least that's what the CEO thinks!

Who likes girls that wear Abercrombie & Fitch? Nobody. NOBODY.

• Teen Vogue's March cover features a shot of Twilight's Ashley Greene that makes her neck look about twice as long as usual. Weird angle? Odd hair placement? Overzealous Photoshop? Perfect storm of the above? Whatever, it's uncanny. [Styleite]

• To further her plan for wold domination, Snooki — author, slipper-wearer, and cultural touchstone to millions — will soon be pimping a slew of licensed products, including jewelry (a NYE ball necklace!), clothing, and sunglasses. [NYPost]

• Adriana Lima, husband Marko Jaric, and baby daughter Valentina posed for Hola! brazil. The Victoria's Secret model discussed her pregnancy, which was plagued with complications including preeclampsia. Valentina was born prematurely. [HuffPo]

• Here is Marc Jacobs and his new men's perfume. It's like Tom Ford and Juergen Teller had a meeting, and this is what they came up with. "We tried it with clothes, but it didn't work," claims Jacobs. [WWD]

• Model Rie Rasmussen, upset Terry Richardson included her picture in his book Terryworld alongside images of young girls performing sex acts, confronted the photographer at a party in Paris for using his position of power to exploit women. She said:

• Lindsay Lohan's debut Ungaro collection was critically panned, and so unpopular that the brand lost its only U.S. retailers besides its own boutique. Now that boutique is calling customers to tell them the store is closing on February 27. [TheAwl]

• As if trashgate and the news that it knowingly sold genetically-engineered cotton as "organic" weren't bad enough, now H&M is in trouble for the unsafe levels of lead in its handbags. The revelation comes courtesy of California's strict environmental laws:

• Lily Allen told a British radio show that she is quitting performing for two years to open a boutique called Lucy In Disguise. She's also going to found a record label. [Elle UK]

• Michelle Obama may have skipped the CFDAs, but she'll celebrate the National Design Awards at the White House on July 24. The winners, chosen by the Smithsonian and including Francisco Costa, will participate in events around Washington. [WWD]

• How cool are these Charlie Brown New Balance sneakers? Cool enough that we wish they weren't just for kids. [WWD]
• A London artist has created Kate Moss and Agyness Deyn paper dolls which look frighteningly like the real thing. [Pipeline.Refinery29]

• Helena Christensen is one of the many hailing British Vogue's Alexandra Shulman. "Obviously I am of the same belief," said the supermodel photographer. "Aren't we in a business that is supposed to explore all kinds of shapes and silhouettes?" [WWD]

• Funny, this picture of Amy Winehouse looking "healthy and stylish" still looks off. British label PPQ is bringing the troubled singer's long-rumored fashion line to fruition — if you count PPQ "providing all materials and doing the design," as anything like having your own collection. [This is London]

Dov Charney, the CEO so skeevy he ought to be an R. Crumb character, is in the news again. His highly leveraged company is weathering the downturn, but only barely.

• W on toy maker Steiff's limited edition, $1,500 Lagerfeld bear. "Naturally it looks just like him, from the impenetrable black sunglasses and high shirt collar to the skinny lacquered jeans. But, plush alpaca head aside, is the resemblance more than skin-deep? 'Bears are very nice, as long as you are nice to them,'…