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What War?
Lindsay Lohan and George W., Separated At Birth

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JerseyGrrrl
08/13/09

In reply to Cosmo: Make His Junk Look Like A Face
We can't let our curiosity for #43 keep us from noticing the word "Hoo-ha" printed in 40 point type to the right of Kristen's own....vagina! OMG I said IT!!!
**waits for everyone to giggle and hit each other with pillows**

I cannot take information about my anatomy seriously when it's delivered to me using terms like "hoo-ha." Call it a VAGINA. Or be all edgy and abbreviate to "vadge." I'M A BIG GIRL.
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Dave J.
08/13/09

@JerseyGrrrl: How about "Lady VaVa"?
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JerseyGrrrl
08/13/09

@Dave J.: I guess? If it's wearing a giant bow made of pubic hair on its head and sequined tape pants**? ;)

For real, though, the dumb slang they pull out undermines the supposed dual messages of sex positivity and knowledge of the female body.

**I feel like this thread is one big homage to The Vagina Monologues
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Zombie Ms. Skittles
08/13/09

In reply to Cosmo: Make His Junk Look Like A Face
But wait, what's #43? Cosmo has piqued my interest and I won't be at the grocery store so I can poke through it in line for a few weeks!!! Help a sister out!
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Anna N.
08/13/09

@Zombie Ms. Skittles: Spoiler Alert: it's the makeup brush thing.
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devilchyld22
01/22/09

In reply to Yes We Can (Have Political Problems Already)
"Mr. Obama arrived at the Oval Office at 8:35 a.m. on Wednesday and spent 10 minutes in his new office alone. He read a note left for him by President George W. Bush, sealed in an envelope marked, "To #44, From #43.""

For some reason this made me laugh.

Seems so middle school.
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funnyface
01/22/09

@devilchyld22: "Do you like me? Circle Yes or No."
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deitybox
01/22/09

@devilchyld22: "I've seen you around. I find you very attractive........
would you go to bed with me?"
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Tart of Darkness
01/22/09

@devilchyld22: Can't you just see him printing carefully with the tip of his tongue sticking out of the side of his mouth?
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PrettyPrettyPrincess
01/22/09

@devilchyld22: But in a good way - I think it's kind of cute. I am ready to recategorize him as cute because he can no longer do any harm. Maybe the cool-aid is getting to me?
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ucelluccia
01/07/09

In reply to Sex, Guys & Audiotape: "Summer Songs '99"
HA. I just finished this month's mix for the Husband:

sparks and shining dragons: for jason (1:10:56)

1. You Belong To Me - Jo Stafford

2. Sweet Pea - Amos Lee

3. Nine In The Afternoon - Panic at the Disco

4. I Wanna Sex You Up - Charlie ASH

5. Buddy Holly - Biffy Clyro

6. He's A Rebel - The Morning Benders

7. Falling - Ben Kweller

8. Fade to Black - Evan Dando

9. Times Like These - Ryan Adams

10. Made Up Lovesong #43 - Guillemots

11. No One - The Honorary Title

12. Up to My Neck in You - Mark Kozelek

13. Our Way to Fall - Yo La Tengo

14. Keeping You - Tanya Donelly

15. My Funny Valentine - Rufus Wainwright

16. With You - Natalie Walker

17. Ice Cream [Live] - Sarah McLachlan

18. Big Me [Live] - Foo Fighters

19. 02-75 [Live] - The Mountain Goats

20. The Book of Love - Catherine A.D.

21. What Are You Doing New Year's Eve? - Ella Fitzgerald
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dcdulce
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
anyone have a chancla to throw?

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Rooo sez BISH PLZ
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
Dear Jezzie Editors:

You have power and influence in the world of journalism.

(Oh, you can protest out of modesty, but we have seen it expand in the direction of Worldwide Global Domination.)

Please use your powers for good and shut her up.

Kisses,

Rooo
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EkaterinaBallerina
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
She's so right about this! I mean it's not like they've been able to prove that the number of insurgents and terrorists worldwide have increased exponentially as a result of Bush's policies since 2001. It's not like those who went into Guantanamo as innocent civilians don't come out of it as terrorists. It's not like our allies on the "war on terror" haven't been attacked as well. And most importantly, it's not like the fact that we are hemorrhaging money in Iraq and Afghanistan has made us any less able to combat more serious conflicts or even, gasp, home-grown wars.

OH WAIT...
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WaltzingMatilda
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
Lizzy dear, normally linking the adjective "shrill" or the noun "harpy" with women makes my blood boil, but you have cured me! You freaking shrill harpy.
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J.D.Regent
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
Environmental devastation, economic wipeout, climate change/end times, mercury in my water, NSA on my phone line -- gee, safety sure feels scary!
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BabyJane
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
Does anyone know how to repair a broken record?
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ellaesther
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
So many, many ways to reply to that notion. Oh, the mind reels! But they all come down to this:

No, he did not.

But then, he did do enormous damage to the factoracy, so I'm not sure that simply stating the truth will be a powerful enough retort.
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battleaxonista...is a humorless bitch
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
I'm pretty sure if someone threw their shoe at her, Elisabeth's cognitive abilities would be too slow to do the insta-duck Bush displayed recently. So what I'm saying is, someone throw some damn shoes! There won't even be secret service there!!
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BabyJane
12/15/08

@battleaxonista: I'll volunteer. I have excellent aim.
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Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
Yep. I feel loads safer. THanks Bush.

*Stockpiles food, loads semi-automatic weaponry, completes finishing touches on atomic fall-out shelter*
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morninggloria
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
Condoms keep me safe. George W. Bush keeps me angry.
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info*ninja
12/15/08

@morninggloria: Zing!
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Crabby Cakes
12/15/08

@morninggloria: Ladies and Gentleman, we have a winner!
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morninggloria
12/15/08

In reply to What War?
I didn't die that one time I got really drunk and insisted on walking home at 3 am by myself. Alcohol, therefore, keeps me safe.
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badmutha
12/15/08

@morninggloria: I've never died! It keeps me safe too! This is a great thing to realize, in my book.
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million.dollar.mouth.
12/15/08

@morninggloria: I didn't get pregnant that one time I had un-protected sex, therefore, unprotected sex makes me safe.
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Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC
12/15/08

@morninggloria: Alcohol protects me from the sadness...oh, and global warming and brain-eating alien cats.
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hellosunshine
12/15/08

@morninggloria: Actually, I like this one.
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Lindsay Lohan and George W., Separated At Birth

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