Jezebel 
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New York, 7:49 AM
Sun Nov 29
17 posts in the last 24 hours
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09/12/09
08/21/09
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08/20/09
-- Your 29-year-old brother.
08/20/09
08/20/09
This was exactly what I needed to read right now, and exactly why I love Jezebel. I'm -no joke- printing out your column and saving a hard copy right now.
08/20/09
The other thing I realized is you're never really, truly starting from "scratch." Even though I'm not in academia, I don't regret going to grad school or see those years as "wasted." You're always going to be drawing on your experience no matter what you end up doing. And if my experience is any guide, it can be a bunch of different things before you find something that feels right.
I guess what I'm saying is, don't be afraid to start over. You'll turn 30 or 40 or 50 or whatever no matter what so you might as well be doing something you love.
08/21/09
YES. I had a period of that when I was about 27. I had just gotten a divorce. I had about two hundred bucks and a shitty car to my name. I had no job. I felt like the lowest of the low.
But I needed to do all of those things if I was to continue to grow. Had I stayed in my old life, I would have died a psychic death. So who cares if I was broke at 27? It was a tough spot and something I needed to go through in order to continue to grow as a person.
08/20/09
Maybe it's just because I've had the opportunity to get to know a lot of people in their late 30s, 40s and beyond who have done incredible things, taking up second and third careers and kicking ass at them, but I can no longer get on board with this idea that the things worth doing can only be done in your 20s. It's limiting and self-destructive, and what's more, it's not even accurate.
08/20/09
Ladies - we are young (even if you are 60!)! We are intelligent! We are wonderful people! Our lives are not over - surely they are just beginning. And they will be just beginning tomorrow, too. Don't you dare give up on yourselves. You haven't peaked! Don't be disappointed. No freaking way.
We'll always feel like we never have "it" whatever it is. And that is because we expect a lot from ourselves. But you very well may have someone else's "it." I think I have the "it" that some of you are seeking, and I see that some of you have the "it" that I seek.
Give yourself a break. Put your feet up. Have a glass of wine. Bake. Knit. Watch TV. Read. Whatever it takes. You deserve a little break.
(And yes, I am including myself in this "pep talk" of sorts)
08/20/09
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08/20/09
I think it's up to the smart, independent, sassy women of the world to give a collective finger to the messages telling us women of a certain (or of any) age fit into any box.
This column is a great addition. *claps*
08/20/09
I quit my first job as a paralegal and have been at this one for about a year and a half now, and even though I like it, I can't escape the feeling that I was this prodigal wunderkind who now makes her living as a glorified secretary. (And not "of State," either.)
I don't want to be an admin for the rest of my life and I'm tired of searching for new roommates for my 2-bedroom just outside of Boston, so I want to buy a condo next summer -- but I quit smoking last year and turned to shopping as a form of therapy, impulse-buying whatever I wanted to make myself feel better about the nervous breakdown I had last November. I'm in just enough credit card debt to annoy me and to keep serious saving just beyond my reach.
Which is all a way of saying thank you for writing this, Doree, and maybe I'll come back to these disjointed paragraphs in ten years and wonder what the hell I was so worried about.
08/20/09
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08/21/09
@bythesea: I don't know if I could flee to Vienna, but Australia frequently crosses my mind.
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08/20/09
While I'm here FREAKING OUT about everything, all the time, being sad in my own sit-in-my-darkened-room-in-silence kind of way.
This piece makes me feel so...relieved. I'm not crazy (or less crazy than I thought). Seriously, I'm like teary-eyed. I'm going to make a similar list. I hope you had (have?) a lovely birthday :)
08/20/09
No worries, I am 5 years older and in the same spot.
08/20/09
I recommend just looking at one thing you can change, one thing you always wanted to do that you are not doing, and then start doing it. Don't try to do it all at once, because you won't succeed and then you'll feel even worse.
*hugs* It sucks, I've totally been there. But you've got the power to make a change inside of you. Trust.
08/20/09
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