Boner? .... Boner?
Last month, Nixon speechwriter cum bit actor cum game show host cum editor of a respected conservative publication Ben Stein penned a seriously batshit essay about being a creepy old man for aforementioned respected conservative publication. In that essay, Stein talked about his "friendship" with a "a stunningly beautiful, absolute knockout young Eurasian woman," a former escort whom he met at the airport in San Francisco. Stein, who is married, began talking to the woman daily and giving her money because he has the personality of a horny virgin from an 80's sex comedy in the body of a 69-year-old man in 2014. And his version of the the story kind of trailed off from there.
Now, the "young Eurasian woman" from Stein's essay has come forward to the New York Post's Emily Smith with text messages and anecdotes of her interactions with the star that show that not only is Ben Stein kind of a weirdo, he's a self-pitying creep.
Tanya Ma, who is 18 weeks pregnant, tells the Post that she initially began communicating with Stein because she believed that he could help her start her writing career.
"He said he'd read my blog, and I gave him my contact information," she said. "We texted for about four months, then he asked me to send him pictures. He said he was very captivated and he just wanted to remember me. After a while, he started asking for more racy photos."
Then, earlier this month, "He wanted to place me in a hotel near where he lives" in LA, Ma said.
But "the day before I was supposed to meet him, he texted me" about wanting to touch and kiss, she said.
Ma said the ex-Comedy Central star wrote, "When you get here i want to hug and kiss you. I understand you don't want to f–k me. But i want to touch you and kiss you."
In text messages Ma provided to the Post, Ma is seen asking Stein for money, Stein indicates he's obliged, and then things took a turn.
Sucking up to old rich guys you have no interest in beyond what money they can give you isn't a good look unless you're costarring in a madcap fifties musical romcom, but it's an even worse look when you're the old rich guy expecting to give money and get some of that pregnant sex in return. And it's a triple bad when that rich guy tries to claim the moral high ground when he's the one who misrepresented himself as a person interested in helping the young woman's career when, in fact, all he wanted was poon.
But Stein doesn't see things that way. In a series of almost comically oblivious quotes to the Post, he defends his role in his friendship with Ma,
She is a person I have only met for less than five minutes at an airport. I have never touched her, I have never had any sexual contact with her. I should get a medal for helping this woman. [...]
I just don't get what I have done wrong. She is mad at me because she wanted more money. [...]
I didn't expect anything from her. Hugging and kissing doesn't mean I wanted to f–k her. I said that explicitly in my text. When is it wrong to hug people?
Stein claims to have "never touched" Ma despite the fact that the Post's lede image on the story of Ben Stein with his arm draped across Ma's shoulders. To quote a popular Ben Stein commercial spot: Wow.
Is there anything to learn from this tale of two people who sound like they're both different flavors of awful getting mad at each other when each of them behaves in an awful manner? Perhaps.
First, never give horny old Republican your contact info, especially if he wants to fuck you. Second, if you are a celebrity, never demand sexual favors from a person who wants money; if you do not give them they money, they will figure out a way to get money by selling the story of how you demanded sexual favors in exchange for money. And third, Ben Stein may not be a preeminent voice in politics anymore, but he's definitely a man so creepy that he has no idea what a creep he is. A Jedi-level creep. That shit might fly under Tricky Dick, but we're neck deep in the Obama years, Stein.