Not only is it unfair to them, it's unfair to us Asian women who have to endure scrutiny about dating white guys.
Confused? Then let Tiffany Wang explain for you. She writes in The Bold Italic about how this particular stereotype connects to the judgment she gets for dating a white man:
We met living abroad in Beijing, China, where yellow fever among expats runs rampant, and subsequent suspicion from the local population stokes racial tensions. It took me months to call him my boyfriend. When I walked with him hand in hand, I saw smug expressions from white dudes, dismissive sneers from Chinese men, and judgmental looks from white and Chinese women alike.
She also asserts that how in racially diverse San Francisco, her hometown, people so commonly denigrate Asian men for having small penises that it's taken as gospel, and not racism, and bleeds into everybody assuming that she is dating a white man because of this incontrovertible fact.
So in order to set the record straight, Wang writes about how her current boyfriend's race is no reflection on her dating preferences, and about how she hates having it seem that way to other people. She also discusses how Asian men are portrayed in popular culture, as unsexy or unvirile, with the lone exception of Steven Yeun's character in The Walking Dead, for whom Wang constantly prays to survive, because of this reason.
The whole essay is worth a read, but I can't resist putting in Wang's parting shot:
Sometimes our dating preferences are no accident, but not always. It's important to make the distinction. So the next time you hear someone say, "I'm just not into Asian men," do me a favor and slap them across the face. That, or show them a picture of Takeshi Kaneshiro.
Seriously, check out how good-looking Takeshi Kaneshiro is.
Image via Shutterstock.