Over the past month, Iowa Rep. Steve King has been one of the most vocal supporters of SB102, the controversial Arizona bill (recently vetoed by AZ Governor Jan Brewer) that would have allowed businesses to discriminate against and refuse service to gay people on religious grounds. While many argued that such a law would be a massive violation of civil rights, King disagreed, saying, "It's clear in the civil rights section of the code that you can't discriminate against people based upon — I'm not sure that I got the list right — race, creed, religion, color of skin, those kind of things, and there's nothing mentioned in there on self-professed behavior. And that's what they're trying to perfect is special rights for self-professed behavior."
According to Rep. King, this so-called "self-professed behavior" means that business owners would only be able to discriminate against a gay person if the gay person made a point of telling the business that they're gay. It's a "have your cake and eat it, too" situation — business owners would get the discrimination bill that they want and gay people could the perfectly fine service that they want just so long as they stay in the closet. Everybody wins!
Except, of course, the poor, victimized businesses that that are tricked into discriminating by someone only pretending to be gay for the sake of a legal case. What a sticky situation for your run-of-the-mill bigot! How can they know they're violating the civil rights of the appropriate group of people if there's no way of telling who's actually gay versus who's a lying self-professed gay?
Stephen Colbert has a solution, but he needs the help of homosexual community (the community who longs to be discriminated against for who they really are) to make it work. Colbert asks that all of you out there who happen to be in a sexual relationship with someone of your same gender go out and prove your gayness to Rep. King using cold, hard evidence. Which is to say, please send him your nudie pixxx and sex tapes.
If you missed that address, here it is again:
Representative Steve King
2210 Rayburn Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515