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The answer to this one may be obvious — no matter how liberal a parent may be, I think everyone can agree that it's too soon if the kid doesn't have any pubes — but no! Manicures for babies. Eyebrow waxes for 11-year-olds. 6-year-olds getting perms. Bikini waxes for 12-year-olds. These things are apparently happening all over America, according to the piece aired on Good Morning America today. They suggest that young girls are heading into salons at all ages to get beauty treatments done — at the encouragement of their mothers — and I can't even begin to wrap my head around it. Sure, I was one of those late bloomers who waxed the furry caterpillars off of her face for the first time at the junior prom (and that was very overdue — trust me) and in hindsight, even that feels a little too young. But this was a decade ago, and obviously times, they are a'changing. So I ask, how young is too young? Discuss. More »
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"Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle" reads the motto helpfully left on the pillow of each penitent doing the Ranch at Live Oak cleanse. At $800 and 1500 calories a day, easy for them to say. More »
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A Florida grifter allegedly wrote a New York spa bad checks for a facial and five bottles of skin cream, totaling $504.04. "I can't believe someone would risk jail time over something like this," said the spa's owner. [N.Y. Post] More »
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Today, mothers who've invested a college education's worth of spa and beauty treatments on their kids—ages 9 and under—appeared on Tyra. What's even more ridiculous is that the angle of the show was all, "Isn't this cute?" More »
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Trend that won't die: kiddie spas. Seriously: "a shrine to pint-size pampering, primping and preening." [Miami Herald] More »
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Today's Times takes us inside the latest alleged craze amongst the rich — Tupperware-style at-home beauty treatment parties, in which people try (and presumably purchase) ludicrous devices as an economical alternative to spa weekends. The bargains include "a $28,000 home massage machine," some electronic pacifier that whitens teeth, and that fore-mentioned taser — the Galvanic Spa II Ex — which "contains negative ions that are forced into the skin by the device’s negative polarity and attach themselves to dirt. Then, the polarity is reversed and and the dirt is pulled out while a positively charged lotion is driven in." More »
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Hey, you big fat whale-woman. Did you know that you are as big as a whale? Well, you are also as ugly as a cow, you big sow. Don't comparisons like that just make you want to buy things? The Del Mar medical spa in Bucharest hopes so, with their new ads that show women evolving from cows and whales (there is also an ad of a man evolving from a pig). Get it? We are big ugly cows (and whales) that need "medical spa" treatments to turn into toned babes (but not without a few mixed-species freako stages in the middle). When you're trying to sell a service or product to your potential customers, it's best to insult them in the most sexist and least imaginative way possible. (Click pic to see the ads.) [Copyranter] More »
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Good Morning America is so fresh out of ideas that they're watching month-old episodes of the Today Show for inspiration. Diane Sawyer and Co. are just picking up the tween spa meme and running it into the ground. Some six year olds are getting their hair chemically straightened, some 12-year-old girls are getting bikini waxes, preteen boys remain cruel, as always. Clip of dismayed reporters and smug mommies above. More »
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• Pregnant singer Lily Allen has announced that she has turned down multiple offers to design a maternity line, given that so many of her fans are tween girls and feels that attaching her name to getting knocked up just "wouldn't be suitable." Jaime-Lynn, are you listening? [BBC]

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In the "Thursday Styles" section of today's New York Times, we learn that vanity and sadism go hand in hand — and know no limits! Beth Landman writes about aestheticians who are not just brutally honest — they are straight up mean. And the rich ladies who rely on them just love it! Isabel Dassinger, 50, sees Julie Lindh at NYC's Townhouse Spa. Ms. Lindh recently told Ms. Dassinger: "If you don't stay out of the sun and use the products I suggest, you will have saggy skin, jowls, and look like someone's grandmother in a couple of years." Ms. Dassinger was shocked at first but says, "You get used to it. Julie gets away with talking to people like that because she makes your skin look amazing." More »
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