Show Your March Madness Team Spirit With a Well-Timed Vasectomy

March Madness is upon us, which means many basketball fans are about to disappear for two weeks and return, blinking at the unfamiliar sunlight, only when a winner is crowned. So many men are apparently taking this opportunity to kill two birds with one stone, by scheduling their vasectomies.

You must admit, it’s a pretty genius scheme if you don’t want overtime interrupted by requests to take out the trash.

One man, a partner in a private equity firm, summed it up for CNN:

“If you are going to be laid up on the couch for a few days, you might as well get (a vasectomy) done when there is some great college basketball on TV,” said Mike LaSalle, a 40-year-old father of two who had a vasectomy Friday. “You had all the conference championship games over the weekend and the NCAA tourney starts this week.”

One doctor told CNN that patients often book early for March Madness slots, and another reports a 50 percent increase in procedures. It’s such a commonly held belief that vasectomies spike during March Madness that last year, a clinic offered a free pizza for anyone who booked during the tournament, as a means of encouraging the recently snipped to stay off their feet while healing.

Now, the American Urological Association says it’s got nada, zero, zilch data demonstrating a link between the college basketball face-off and vasectomy numbers. But what’s empirical evidence compared to glorious anecdata like this?

“This patient in the past few years came in with his team’s logo on an ice bag, Ohio State,” the urologist recalled. “He was just excited about the game, and I said, ‘We are all Ohio State fans today.'”

Wonder if I can get an IUD in the shape of a Disney princess? I mean, they do wedding dresses and everything.