Jezebel: Shit Show

160 Seconds Of The VMAs Worth Watching

Tracie Egan Morrissey — Mon, 13 Sep 2010 12:19:48 EDT

At the start of last night's show, host Chelsea Handler said, "I'm scared that this year all of you idiots will suddenly get your acts together." Unfortunately, she was right. Still, with no scandals, there were some memorable moments. More »

Assigning All Blame For Everything To NBC News President Steve Capus

Megan Carpentier — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 10:00:00 EDT

John McCain has told us all that he didn't want to go negative, it's just that no one was paying attention to him when he wasn't acting like an asshole, what with the long Democratic primary season and the historic nature of the Democrats' options and whatnot. So, he had to go negative. Don't you see? Jason Linkins and I don't really see, but we're happy to blame NBC News President Steve Capus — who ran with the lipstick-on-a-pig story and removed Keith Olbermann from anchoring MSNBC's election coverage for having the audacity to suggest that the RNC's porny, eyeball raping homage to the courage of Republicans on 9/11 at the convention was a disgusting display. That, plus the End of the World (financially speaking), how drilling babies will solve all that and Sarah Palin (yes, more Sarah Palin) begin after the jump. More »

MTV VMAs: 70 Seconds Worth Watching

Tracie Egan Morrissey — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 15:00:00 EDT

God, the VMAs were beyond boring this year. Even the people in the live audience didn't want to be there. You know it's bad when Jamie Foxx has to come out on stage and literally tell people to wake up. I think the show's producers were hoping they'd be credited for introducing Russell Brand to America, hoping he'd be the new Borat. Except, he sucked, so he's actually the new Yahoo Serious. Nice knowin' ya, Russell! And you know, not that I really care about how the award winners are determined, or that I even give any credence to the legitimacy of these things, but how fucking bullshit was it that Britney walked away with all three awards that she was nominated for, just so that MTV could get her to show up? Anyway, above you'll find the awards boiled down to the only 70 seconds worth seeing. More »

Oprah Helps Grown Man Go Poo Poo On The Potty

Tracie Egan Morrissey — Thu, 22 May 2008 11:00:00 EDT

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Yesterday's Oprah was all about people with extreme obsessive compulsive disorder. She shipped a group of them off to a camp with Dr. Oz and an OCD specialist, both of whom were given the difficult task of helping one man overcome his fear of sitting on a toilet seat — any toilet seat. The guy can't even crap on the toilet at his own home, so he's been pooping outside for years. At camp, his therapy required him to touch a toilet seat and then lick his fingers. Honestly, I don't even want to ever have to do that, and I don't even have OCD. It worked for him, however! He's been crapping on the can in his own home since he left Oprah's camp. Clip above. More »