'Selfie,' 'Freegan,' and 'Catfish' Are Added to the Dictionary

It’s time for that part of the year where we helplessly debate why esteemed publications are succumbing to all the things we make fun of on blogs. Merriam-Webster is once again trolling all the people who paid way too much for their English Lit degrees with its annual list of new dictionary words.

Yay! This is like the collective Internet version of me during my annual obligatory pre-Easter mass confessional: “Oh by the way, Father O’Flaherty! I’ve totally been living in sin with my boyfriend and I say the Lord’s name about 3,753 times a day and you probably don’t even want to ask me about my opinions about the alien race who faked all that Shroud of Turin shit.”

But none of the horrendous, evil sins I unload upon my inexplicably understandable priest can possibly compare to the unholy upheaval that true English language disciples have to endure every time the new list of words accepted by major dictionary publications are announced. Here’s the full list of new additions (with links to their definitions) via Merriam-Webster Online:

This year, Merriam-Webster finally acknowledged the life-altering importance of the word “selfie.” (WE ARE FINALLY LEGIT, FELLOW DUCK FACERS!) It’s really good to see poutine finally getting its moment in the spotlight. Poutine has played the role of sad, overlooked yet beautiful understudy to chili cheese fries for far too long.

Also, let’s all mock the fancy fart pants people at Merriam-Webster for FINALLY acknowledging “turducken.” Like none of them have spent the past umpteen years at awkward Thanksgiving dinners with a drunk uncle bitching about how his “genius” idea for combining several proteins all at once.