Sam Lutfi penned an open letter swearing to the world he's only trying to help Amanda Bynes and not, say, take advantage of her situation to gain exposure for himself.

In an article for XO Jane's "It Happened to Me" series, Lutfi plays the World's Smallest Violin trying to get people to understand how he's been mislabeled as a sleazy creep who weasels his way into the lives of troubled young starlets like Britney Spears so he can take advantage of them at their weakest moments. But he only does that because he wants to help them, you see:

I've worked in Hollywood for a long time, and over the years these experiences have led me to see what happens when too much fame and too much money can sometimes get the best of celebrities. I am a problem solver, and I care about helping people get out of what may seem like some of their more difficult places in life. Which is why you have seen me associated with some of the more famous celebrities when they are in their most trying hours:Britney Spears, Courtney Love and now Amanda Bynes.

Spears' parents have quite a different take on that situation than Lutfi, in case you are wondering. Lutfi claims his name has been "dragged through the mud" because "people in Hollywood fight dirty." As for Bynes, it was Lutfi who reportedly tricked her into coming to Los Angeles, so she could be placed on psychiatric hold.

All I can tell you is that Amanda is getting the help that she needs and that I am working closely with her and her family in order to ensure that we can move on from the tabloid sensationalism of her "breakdown" and instead concentrate on what a rare, talented young woman she has always been and continues to be.

By the way, the article is subtitled "Don't believe everything you read." I'll leave it at that.

[XO Jane]


Make sure that you are always on time when you have to get Britney Spears to rehearse with Madonna is my takeaway/life lesson from this. [MTV News]

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Despite the fact that the couple checked two items off his bucket list while together, love no longer smiles on Charlie Sheen and his latest fiance Brett Rossi. They have decided to split just before their planned wedding. MY GOD, can you imagine what is on Charlie Sheen's bucket list? What could possibly be left? "RIDE A WILD BOAR WHILE DRESSED LIKE A FIREMAN" is probably something he checked off at Playboy mansion party in 1993. [Gossip Cop]

Jimmy Fallon wrote a book called "Your Baby's First Word Will Be Dada." It is a nuanced analysis of the art movement Dadaism and is being hailed as "absolutely adorable!" Art critics are getting weird these days, man. [The Hollywood Reporter]

Paris Hilton, everyone. [Hollywoodtuna]

Here is 15 full seconds of Scott Foley staring at you. Look into his sweet, boyish eyes and promise you will love him forever and ever. You will not dump for Dr. Zach Braff or President Icky McJerkface Fitz, right? RIGHT. [HuffPo Live Instagram]

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All Katy Perry wanted for her birthday was to be immortalized in a Shakey's marquee. And you guys said I was nuts for demanding Taco Bueno change their sign to a picture of me eating a beef Muchacho. [TMZ]

Meghan Trainor will duet with Miranda Lambert at the CMAs. Even if you do not like country music, I highly suggest you always, ALWAYS put the CMAs on your television viewing schedule. Something completely batshit crazy always happens. Trust your Auntie Rebecca. [The Tennessean]

Glee's Matthew Morrison got married in Hawaii to Renee Puente this weekend. They look very happy! [E Online]

North West donned leather pants to go to a pumpkin patch. As soon as she arrived, she found the biggest, most beautiful pumpkin in the patch and claimed it as her own. She then demanded all the other pumpkins in the patch be destroyed. Her royal advisers begged her to reconsider but she would not be moved by their pleas for mercy. [Daily Mail]

Here is newlywed Matthew Morrison singing "Bring Him Home" from Les Miserables because every Monday needs this.

Image via PCN, Getty.