Reddit Has Already Figured Out How to Make the New iPhone Creepy

Well, that was quick: just days after the release of the new iPhone, the gentlemen/scholars of Reddit have already figured out a way to make it weird and creepy: by using the slow motion video camera function to record and swap videos of bouncing boobs. Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of boobs, just a-bouncin’.

I kind of get it: boobs are awesome and mesmerizing, and they look cool in slow-mo on account of the fact that they’re basically two wonders of physics strapped to the chest of half the population. But the fact that people thought it might be cool to film some slow-mo yabos isn’t what’s creepy here; what’s creepy is the response.

According to The Daily Dot, the first GIRLFRIEND BEWBS TEST video currently has more than half a million views and garnered more than 2,300 views in its first day. There’s now an entire subreddit dedicated to filming headless lady torsos bouncing around slowly. Hundreds of these “my girlfriend’s tits” videos now live in one specific corner of the internet.

First, allow me to entertain you with a Cheap Joke: Whoda guessed that hundreds of Reddit users had girlfriends? (rim shot) (high fives my ladybros) Second, aren’t there other things in the world to film in slow motion besides your girlfriend’s disembodied breasts? Maybe rain falling? A cat jumping? An egg breaking? Fire burning? I don’t know.

And call me a luddite who doesn’t understand The Childrens and their Technologies, but it seems extra silly to me that people would spend hours waiting in an outdoor line in order to be among the first of their peers to purchase what is amounting to an expensive boob recording machine. Even if this version of it does come in a cool silver color.