Reasons God Made Girls, According to My New Least Favorite Country SongKelly Faircloth8/20/14 1:40pmFiled to: country musicgirl in a country songraelynngod made girls46834EditPromoteShare to KinjaToggle Conversation toolsGo to permalink Currently climbing the charts on iTunes: "God Made Girls," a new single from 2012 Voice contestant RaeLynn. It's perhaps a sign Pinterest has achieved sentience and is now producing country pop songs. Rayna James would not approve. Advertisement Sample lyrics: "He needed something soft and loud and sweet and proud/But tough enough to break a heart/Something beautiful and breakable that lights up in the dark/So God made girls." The song is a long list of reasons that the alpha and the omega made you, ladies, according to RaeLynn. They boil down to one thing: You exist purely to provide succor and comfort to one special man. to wear a pretty skirt to be the one to flirt to flirtto hold his hand to make him get dressed up to give him a reason to wash that truckto teach him how to dance to be the one to cry to let him driveto give him a reason to hold that course to put up a fight (????) to make him wait on Saturday night to walk downstairs and blow his mind to drag his butt to church to hold him when he hurts The term "retrograde" doesn't do this song justice—it's outright Victorian. "Drag his ass to church"? What, we're responsible for their immortal souls now, too? (Also as an old married lady I'd just like to say good fucking luck getting his ass to dress up.) And it's almost blasphemous to even hint that women were pulled into existence so... dudes would wash the mud off their trucks. Yep, God has a plan, and it's sparkling Ford pickups driven by men, from sea to shining sea. It puts Maddie and Tae's "Girl in a Country Song" into context nicely. It's extra frustrating that RaeLynn is billing this as a "girl empowerment" tune. She told Taste of Country: "There's just something so special about 'God Made Girls,' it comes from a girl's perspective and there's nothing like that on radio right now." Come on, now, surely you can write something from "a girl's perspective" that's about something other than the world revolving around men.