Poor, Horny Romantics Ready to Die Can Work at the Titanic II

Because why not, some gadzillionaire has invested in the Titanic II, an exact replica of that one crazy cruise ship that was so full of love, giant diamonds, and, uh, death, and apparently lonely boners and sad hearts are already willing to pay $1 million to be a bourgie guest at the Neue Titanic. But what if you're a peasant? No worries — you can work on the Titanic II.

Applications for crew and for captain have been flowing in faster than how I would assume water would rush into a ship when it knocks into an iceberg. Eight people have already applied to be Captain. Alas, that death wish shall only be granted to one lucky person!

According to the genius rich dude behind the Titanic II, Clive Palmer, the normal crew will be earning a "pretty similar [wage] to other cruise ships but there will be a certain elitism to say you've worked on Titanic II," and employees' cabins will be better than the passengers' (WHAT?! For peasants?). But most importantly, Palmer thinks "you'd fall in love and get married. It will be a ship full of love." Uh-huh.

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General crew for cruises don't exactly make mad bank — they can make as low as $800/month — and we all know from the shit ship a few months ago that the crew's cabin is essentially a hundred backed-up toilets with mattresses. Oh and did I mention shit? Yes, shit.

Anyways, if you've always felt ready to jump for love and take that risk but are too poor to do it just for fun, apply now.

Clive Palmer Says Staff on Titanic II Will Receive More than a Pay Cheque [News.com.au]