Please, No: Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton Have Already Written a Duet

The things we feared most have already come true. First, Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton’s newly minted coupledom has taken over all of this week’s Dirt Bags. Even worse, the two have written a country song together. A source revealed to People the tune is a mid-tempo country ballad “telling a lover to leave a relationship if that’s what he or she really wants.” I can’t believe this is happening.

There’s no rule saying that two people in the music business who are boning are obligated to do a duet. OR IS THERE? That terrible song and music video that Katy Perry and John Mayer did comes to mind. Gwen, must you do this? What if this is the bad luck music equivalent of getting his name tattooed on you? At least give Blake a saxophone and a checkered tie and make him do a ska duet. Sigh. Well, now it makes sense why Gwen was a cowgirl for Halloween.

[E Online]

Meanwhile, Miranda Lambert, who won Female Vocalist of the Year at last night’s CMAs, has some words about her ex’s new romance. Supposedly, she does not give a F. “She had her suspicions but didn’t really know it was a real thing until the announcement last night,” a source told Us. “But she doesn’t care. She’s divorced and he can date who he wants.” Ohhkay, Miranda.

[Us Weekly]

It’s Kris Jenner’s 60th birthday! As per tradition, her children took to Instagram to send greetings to their dear momager. The sweet photo above photo was posted by Khloe Kardashian. My mom would be so mad.

Aww. Kanye West and his future son already have matching chains. [Twitter]
Jennifer Lawrence is no longer using Rachel Zoe as her stylist. Guess we can blame someone else for this dress. [E Online]
There was a lot of weird Photoshopping done in this magazine feature of Zendaya. [E Online]
Halle Berry is “doing okay” following her divorce from Olivier Martinez. [People]
Eddie Murphy and his girlfriend are welcoming his ninth kid. Could this one be the…Golden Child? (Sorry!) [Dlisted]
Ahh, old loves. Burt Reynolds is still in love with Sally Field! [Perez Hilton]
And ~~Elton~~ Jeremy Sisto used to date ~~Elle Woods~~ Reese Witherspoon! [People]
Even after death, drama surrounding Bobbi Kristina Brown continues. The nurse who cared for her at the hospice wasn’t really a nurse. [Dlisted]