Says this poor bridal party survivor: "Oh Jezebel, where to start. Oh I know:Orthodox Jewish Bridesmaid in a Christian wedding? Check. Unable to show my shoulders, so must wear Star Trek-esque jacket to cover them? Check (I despise David's Bridal) Acres of shiny, unflatteringly colored material that is GUARANTEED to make you look fat? Double check. I couldn't even GIVE this dress away (to one of those prom closets for inner city girls). They took one look and said 'no thanks.'"