--Robert Herrick, 17th century
It sounds like you're saying there's something wrong with Taylor because she's not "ashamed" and "mortified" enough about the fact that she was the victim of a crime. The shame lies with the criminal, though. No one should be "humiliated" by having suffered at someone else's hands. Taylor shouldn't be. I wish you weren't either. What happened to you wasn't your fault. I hope you're in a safe and peaceful place now.
As someone who has both worked in a clothing bank and thrifted her whole life, I can tell you that this is in no way true.
Defamation suits are based on damage that has been done to the plaintiff's livelihood. Since dead people don't make money, his survivors have no cause of action. Armstrong would, had he survived, actually have a viable suit if the specific allegations made by Grammer were untrue, such as if he never broke his wife's jaw. His past wrongdoing could not have been brought into evidence in that suit; the court doesn't consider this relevant. It would look at what was said and whether it were truthful.
Suing on what grounds? The release he signed isn't invalid because he's deceased. I'm curious what cause of action might apply here.