Oriental Trading Wedding! is a catalog that promises to "make your day perfect for less." It offers a lot of cheap shit you don't need, bizarre items you don't want, and garbage — literally.

This item is almost perfect, as its trashiness is literal.


The Best Wishes Beach Ball comes in units by the dozen, for wedding reception crowds that have an outdoor concert feel. (Topless girl sitting on her boyfriend's shoulder not included.)


Taken out of context, "Everyone enjoyed blowing bubbles to wish us happiness!" sounds like the English printed on pencil cases you find at the dollar store.


Sole-less, soul-less. Potato, potahto.


Why?


WHY!!????


I've never heard of this custom…


Heidi Montag was given these at her bridal shower.


"His & Hers" casual wear: Look like a tool for $9.99.


Attend a wedding, witness a union, make memories, take a shit, and don't forget to wipe.