Men Lose Weight Faster Than Women Because of Course They Do

Men, can they have it all? YES. All of the weight loss.

According to an article from CNN via upwave (a website I originally spelled as "upgrave," which wouldn't be a website about health but a place for people to purchase high-class graves), men absolutely have an easier time losing weight than women. At least, they do at first: It's easier for men to drop pounds quickly, but "Over the long-term, the playing field is more equal," explained dietician David Grotto. David Grotto not only has an amazing last name, he is "a self-proclaimed 'guyatician.'" GUYATICIAN. First "upgrave," now this.

Anyway, men not only lose weight faster but in more obvious places, like their stomachs. Women carry their weight all over their bodies more evenly, so it's less obvious when they're losing because it's not from "problem" areas. Luckily, in this competition we call life, women tend to catch up with men eventually. It's just that the female body has less lean muscle mass than the male body. That lean muscle mass is the thing that burns calories more quickly.

Because none of this is new information, it's important to note that my favorite part of this article comes at the end, when we get another dosage of not-new-information. It's introduced by the sentence, "Ladies, don't despair: Women have weight-related advantages, too." Please, whatever you do, don't despair! You're not a total garbage person because of your sex:

At the end of the day, dropping pounds is hard work for women and men. And, really, it all boils down to this: Anyone can lose weight — it doesn't matter what your gender is. You just have to be committed to doing it.

Equality in the form of hard work and determination. Just what America was built on.

Image via Tim Boyle/Getty