Melissa Gorga Can't Believe Anyone Would Think Her Book Advocates Rape

Real Housewife turned great American author Melissa Gorga thinks it's just "disgusting" that some people think her new book is promoting marital rape. Marital rape is just, like, subtext. Why don't you learn some reading comprehension, internet? Melissa Gorga has nothing but contempt for your dismal SAT scores.

Gorga told whomever was still listening to her by Friday evening that her book doesn't even a little bit contain insinuations, intimations, or promotions of marital rape:

I don't know how anyone can... My book is about mutual respect with your partner, for one another. It's about honesty, it's about loyalty, it's about making your partner first in your life. Where that word comes into play, to me, is awful and disgusting, to be honest with you.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is the deft hand of the master writer at work. Gorga just flipped all that outrage right around on her critics., and I'm sure no one will be able to retort now that the word "rape" has been placed out of bounds as things one can accuse Gorga of writing about. [E!]

  • Yesterday, Gwyneth Paltrow turned 41, an occasion the internet celebrated by compiling all of the most hilarious Goopisms of the last several years. Here's my favorite: "We’re human beings and the sun is the sun — how can it be bad for you? I don’t think anything that’s natural can be bad for you." Counterpoint: bears. [Refinery 29]
  • Khloe Kardashian dropped the "Odom" from her Twitter handle because crack. [TMZ]
  • Zac Efron just got back from a jaunt to Peru with his papa and don't worry, he's still handsome. [Buzzfeed]
  • After fiddling herself on camera, Sydney Leathers is in talks with SiriusXM radio to host her own show. [NYDN]
  • Mary J. Blige's foundation for women is $200,000 closer to paying off its debt. [TMZ]
  • Here is picture of Lady Gaga pretending to be a mop wearing a flying squirrel costume. [Twitter]
  • Intervention "star" Candy Finnegan is rilly, rilly mad that Justin Bieber made fun of addiction. [TMZ]
  • Prosecutors in the Kanye West airport paparazzo assault case really want jurors to see all the videos of Kanye West confronting photographers in moments of varying inconvenience and travel fatigue. [TMZ]
  • Robert Pattinson has been dating Dylan Penn, daughter of Sean and Robin Wright. [Us]
  • Hugh Jackman won some sort of lifetime achievement award in Spain, which comes with a voucher for a lifetime's worth of free paella. [Fox News]
  • There is no such person as "Sarah Palin." The woman we know as Sarah Palin is actually a persona created by comedy genius Tina Fey. Search your feelings, you know it to be true.Melissa Gorga Can't Believe Anyone Would Think Her Book Advocates Rape

Image via AP, Omar Vega