Thanks to its morally reprehensible concept and sleazy ad campaigns, Ashley Madison — the website for married people looking to cheat — brings to mind gross, gleefully unfaithful married dudes trolling for hot extramarital vaginas. But it takes, as they say, two to tango. What about the women who use the site?
In a piece for GQ, writer Teddy Wayne set out to get to know some "lady Don Drapers," as the magazine calls them. Wayne meets with several women, attempting to find out what makes them intent on cheating on their husbands. While you might have some idea in your mind about who might be open to affairs — passive, sad, lonely attention-starved housewives? — the truth is that many of the women Wayne meets with are aggressive go-getters, so-called Alpha Females. The theory is that it has something to do with the power balance in the marriage:
There's […] a keeping-up-with-the-Mrs.-Robinsons pressure, especially among wives who have at least as much power as their spouses, says Kate Bolick, author of The Atlantic's much discussed "All the Single Ladies" cover article. "When I've watched women cheat in their thirties, they're not necessarily unhappy with their husbands, but they're all alpha women, and they feel entitled to what they want," she says.
Wayne meets with Megan (none of the names are real) who says:
"I'm a dirty old man trapped in a woman's body. I lust after younger men the way dirty old men lust after younger girls. I get dirty old men. I'm looking for eye candy. I'm very shallow."
Megan describes herself as well over 200 lbs., which is ironic, considering the fact that Ashley Madison had an ad campaign that hinged on finding fat women "scary" and undesirable. Her sex drive is, and always has been, very very high.