Ultimate Cool Mom Madonna posted an Instagram photo of her 13-year-old son Rocco & friends clutching bottles of vodka with the caption, “The party has just begun! Bring it! 2014.” As is their wont, the “fans” commenting on social media have gone absolutely batshit in response. What a very effective thing to do — because, if there’s one thing we all know about Madonna, it’s that she hates controversy and deeply cares about the opinions of others.
Madonna later posted another picture with the caption,”No one was drinking we were just having fun! Calm down and get a sense of humor! Don’t start the year off with judgement!” UGH MADONNA WE THOUGHT YOU WERE LETTING THE KID WITH BRACES TAKE BOTTLE SHOTS. WE GOT ALL RILED UP FOR NOTHING. In closing, everyone should resolve to get a life. [Gossip Cop]
Your favorite young couple, the Joffrey and Sansa of Pop Music, the winking Prince of the Isle of Little Shits and his lovely consort, Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez are maybe back together or something. After their steamy (?) Segway ride last week, the Biebs posted an Instagram of the two cuddling with the caption “Love the way you look at me.” My coworker Kate says that it’s an old photo, but Justin Bieber was born approx. six months ago, so how old can it even be??? [Cosmo]
Do you remember how we were all so excited to read Lindsay Lohan‘s tell-all book and learn fun anecdotes about the Mean Girls set and/or tales about taking controlled substances from atop Deadmau5’s helmet? It’s not a real thing. And, to add insult to injury, there is a Lohan tell-all coming, but it’s written by Dina. According to my calculations, Dina Lohan’s book is the worst book ever written. [Radar]
- Behold: the first (?) couple Instagram of Tom Daley and Dustin Lance Black. They went to a restaurant with lamps on the table because they lead an excellent life. [DListed]
- Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis were on the Kiss Cam at a sporting event and so they pressed their lips together while the frenzied masses cheered and gnashed their teeth. [DListed]
- This is really sad: Scott Disick‘s father has passed away just three months after his mom did. [E!]
- Alleged Teen Trainwreck/The Kardashian With a Cool Tumblr Kylie Jenner got a speeding ticket. [NY Daily News]
- While answering fans’ questions online, mild-mannered regular guy Morrisey said, “I see no difference between eating animals and pedophilia.” Really? None at all? Okay. [NY Daily News]
- In a post on LittleMonsters.com, Lady Gaga says she’s been “betrayed” by employees who “gravely mismanaged” her “time and health,” which is why the “Do What U Want” video has taken so long to come out. This means that the video — which probably features known vile human being R Kelly and which was shot by Terry Richardson, a huge creep with a disturbing history of using his position to sexually harass/assault women — is going to come out at some point. Gag. [Gossip Cop]
- Ariana Grande does not know who her rumored boyfriend Adrian Grenier is. [Gossip Cop]
- Lacey Chabert from Mean Girls got married this weekend. [MTV]
- Harry Styles went on ski vacation with Kendall Jenner. Tweens, this tender relationship is happening. Deal with it how you must. [People]
- Lupita Nygong’o brought her little brother to the Palm Springs International Film Festival and it became evident that being extraordinarily stylish runs in the family. [PopSugar]
- MERYL STREEP TAKING SELFIES. [HuffPo]