Faster than Dr. Kimberly Shaw could rip off her wig, Lifetime has revealed plans to cook up yet another juicy, unauthorized tell-all, and this time it’s Melrose Place. The news comes a mere two weeks after announcing The Unauthorized Beverly Hills, 90210 movie. Will you please let us catch our breath, Lifetime?

According to Us Weekly, a rep for the network describes the upcoming dramatization as the following:

“Drawing from true stories and anecdotes from interviews with the original cast and crew, The Unauthorized Melrose Place Story will highlight the remarkable behind-the-scenes moments that shaped the series—from early casting drama and Heather Locklear arriving to ‘save’ Melrose Place to the actors begging its writers for even wilder storylines to make them fan favorites.”

I’m scared of the actors they’re going to choose. Who will play Ms. Locklear playing tough ad exec Amanda Woodward? Who will portray Andrew Shue, brother of Elizabeth? Who will play Grant Show? I’m even more scared of the bad wigs we’re bound to see. Since Lifetime shows no sign of stopping this madness, I’ll just make requests. The masochist in me wants to see them do an unauthorized Dynasty movie next. I’m totally down to watch a designer imposter Joan Collins as Alexis Colby in a catfight with a low-rate form of Linda Evans as Krystle Carrington.


Contact the author at marie.lodi@jezebel.com.

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