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Aw, look at the cute boys from Scranton who got suspended for cutting class to see Obama! They missed a quiz on The Stranger. "Existentialism is dead," one said. If only we could say the same for killing the Arabs, kids! So yeah, we really, really wanted to play hooky today. It's hot in my house and most of the "news" today consists of different ways of saying "Barack Obama is fucked and can't win and has alienated every typical white person he has ever encountered blah blah, blah blah and oh yeah Eliot Spitzer fucks whores; stop me before I kill my laptop without remorse etc." So yeah, Megan and I decided to talk instead about Syria and North Korea and all the other places we could totally obliterate, plus who bought the securities backed by mortgages in Gaza, but we don't really find any answers. Click or don't click, it doesn't really matter. More »
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