http://cache.jezebel.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/jezebel.com.png http://jezebel.com/tag/kids today http://jezebel.com/tag/kids today

A proposed new law in the horrible state of Arizona would require teachers there to keep their behavior G-rated both in and out of the classroom. No, really. The law, sponsored by five Republican senators, would suspend or fire teachers if they spoke or conducted themselves in a manner contrary to FCC regulations for TV at any time. Arizona teachers, batten down your nipples— Janet Jackson style shenanigans will no longer be tolerated. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5885049&view=rss&microfeed=true

Being young and fledgling in today's challenging employment market is tough for job seeking twentysomethings. But it's even tougher when those job seekers' parents can't resist the urge to further infantilize their offspring by interfering in their professional lives. Yes, "helicopter parenting" has made its way from the preschool to the prep school to the college, and now it's made its way to the workplace. Isn't every generation just awful? More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5882818&view=rss&microfeed=true

Starting next fall, instead of jumpers and skirts, female students at a Connecticut parochial school will dress in khakis and polo shirts just like their male classmates. Weirdly, the group most upset about this is the parents, who seem genuinely distressed by the change— not because of any practical reason, but because now they won't get to see their little girls in chaste feminine school uniforms anymore. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5881613&view=rss&microfeed=true

From the perspective of most people over the age of 21, the way teenagers use technology seems like some unsolvable puzzle from the future. Predictions about which products they'll flock to inevitably turn out to be wrong, and that certainly seems to be true in the case of Twitter. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5880795&view=rss&microfeed=true

Our favorite scientist, Samantha Garvey, was on Today this morning, showing off her autographed copy of the State of the Union speech and telling Ann Curry: "My research, my science, has been my ticket out." Since becoming one of 300 semi-finalists in the annual Intel Science Talent search, the homeless teenager has received a $50,000 scholarship from Ellen DeGeneres and AT&T, attended the President's speech in Washington, DC (where she met a bunch of representatives and Nancy Pelosi), and applied to Yale and Brown. Garvey is not one of the 40 finalists in the Intel contest, but it's obvious she's winning anyhow. When asked about her future, Garvey said: "I want to work hard…Continue doing my science. Being at the State Of The Union last night, I got to meet all of these fantastic people, and I just thought, I kind of want to do what they do." Does anyone doubt Samantha Garvey can do whatever she sets her mind to? More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5879141&view=rss&microfeed=true

Forget "Good night and good luck." "Yeppidoodles" is the best evening news catchphrase of all time. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5877917&view=rss&microfeed=true

Last year, the state of Georgia started running "Stop Child Obesity" ads featuring real-live kids employed as child actors. But, of course, the part the kids are playing — that of an overweight child — mirrors reality. Chloe McSwain, one of the kids on billboards and in commercials, has fantastic self-esteem: "I'm very pretty," she tells CBS News. She admits that she worried what people would think when she took the job (she's called "Martiza" in the ad), but decided it was important to help kids. A noble goal, but does this fat-shaming campaign work? The negative tone and "stop sugarcoating it" message seem to encourage the other-ing of overweight people. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5877863&view=rss&microfeed=true

Watch as Juliette, an 8 year-old Australian girl wearing an "I Heart Phuket" t-shirt, single-handedly revives the hardcore punk scene with this song about her dog Robert. Tear it up, Juliette. Tear it up. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5877606&view=rss&microfeed=true

Here's your inspiring story for the day: 17-year-old Samantha Garvey of Long Island moved into a homeless shelter with her family a year ago, but she still managed to become one of 300 semi-finalists for the annual Intel Science Talent Search. Garvey conducted a two and a half year study on aquatic ecosystems, which she describes in the video above. She says her family's situation "motivates me to do the work I do. I want a better life. I want a home. I want to show other people that even though you're going through something bad, there's a brighter side to everything." More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5875746&view=rss&microfeed=true

Check out this picture of an adorable little girl hugging her OH SWEET CHRIST THAT IS A HITLER DOLL. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5874920&view=rss&microfeed=true

Have you ever wanted a kid to be quiet and stop drawing on the drywall with their own poop? Well, according to one psychologist, you need to knock that off this instant, because your prejudice against children— or "childism"— is ruining everything. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5874385&view=rss&microfeed=true

Sydney Spies was on the Today show this morning, discussing the "provocative" photograph that her peers on the yearbook committee banned from being published. "I guess it is artistic," Matt Lauer allowed, "it is also not your run-of-the-mill yearbook photo." Matt asked Sydney's mother, Miki, if she thought the image was appropriate, and Miki cringed as she told Matt, "I asked her not to do it." Then she said something about her child "spreading" her wings — maybe not the best choice of words — and explained that she supports Sydney. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5874299&view=rss&microfeed=true

We're aware that most children are little monsters (and not in a fun Lady Gaga way), but a group of Florida students have reached a new low. On Friday, a 13-year-old girl took the school bus in Ocala for the first time. No one would let her sit down, so she sat on her sister's lap instead, prompting even more teasing from the students on the bus. Someone threw a shoe at the girl's head, and when she hurled it back a fight broke out. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5874228&view=rss&microfeed=true

Ryan has what some folks call an "all-American" look: Blond hair, blue eyes, creamy skin. He also has Down Syndrome. And he's in a Target ad this week — after appearing in a Nordstrom catalog last year. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5873304&view=rss&microfeed=true

Screaming at your toddler for finger-painting your computer won't deter future acts of deviant self-expression, but it will probably help her tell a more convincing lie in ten years about the missing vodka in your liquor cabinet. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5872824&view=rss&microfeed=true

If you stuffed your daughter's stocking with fattening peppermint candies and chocolate Santas this Christmas, you might want to reconsider whether you're really cut out for responsible parenting in light of the fact that Sarah Burge had the foresight to give her 7-year-old daughter the gift that will stave off any threat of sugarplum-induced obesity — a £7,000 (so like a million worthless American dollars) voucher for liposuction. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5872823&view=rss&microfeed=true

Last night on Toddlers & Tiaras, we spent quite a bit of time with Tricia, SamiJo's mom. Tricia, who has a Jesus fish tattoo and a cross-adorned plaque in the kitchen of her crossy home which reads, "when in doubt, look up" explained to us that much has changed since we saw her earlier this year. For starters, she had to have a breast augmentation so that she could be in the Mrs. Oklahoma pageant. It was "necessary," she informed us. She did not win (or place) in the competition, but that's okay, because her "ultimate goal" is to be in the Lingerie Football League. Meanwhile, when Tricia was going through SamiJo's heavily-Photoshopped photographs, and SamiJo expressed distaste (eewwww) about one picture, Tricia said, "You don't like that one? You look chubby?" Way to put words in a two-year-old's mouth (and possibly body-conscious thoughts in her mind). Also! It was really amusing the way Tricia explained that by doing pageants herself, she now has a lot more respect "for what SamiJo enjoys." As though she made a serious effort and went outside of her comfort zone to experience something her child is interested in. Ha. The kid is not the pageant enthusiast. You are. Own up to it. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5870455&view=rss&microfeed=true

Recently we've been hearing that fewer teens are having sex, but you haven't forgotten the hysteria caused by reports of teen "rainbow parties," have you? Good, because there's a new teen sex problem that actually exists. Researchers found significant number of teen girls are having group sex, and it's often non-consensual. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5869215&view=rss&microfeed=true

People who were part of the Black Pride movement of the 1960s also took pride in wearing their hair natural instead of using straightening combs or chemical relaxers. Their pride in African culture was an Afro-centric view that really shook (read: terrified) most middle-class Americans. The way they wore their hair was soon dubbed an "Afro," which was shorthand for Afro-centric. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5868784&view=rss&microfeed=true

I don't have any children (that I know of, heh) and very few of my close friends have kids, but I believe that children are the future, teach them well and let them lead the way. Which means you want kids to be smart and interesting and creative and so on, and not just pawns in a corporate conglomerate chess game, where every cartoon is a secret marketing ploy for a made-in-China non-bio-degradable thingamajig that will only be entertaining for three hours on December 25th. As a kid, I spent a lot of time in museums, and I think some of the best presents for kids can be found in an institution devoted to arts or sciences. Yeah, that's right, I'm one of those people who believes in edjumacational gifts, okay? Here are some suggestions… More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5868262&view=rss&microfeed=true

Since Snow White is 74 years old, Aurora from Sleeping Beauty is 52 and Belle from Beauty And The Beast is a decrepit 20 years old, Disney, the font of all things princessy, has created a new princess, just for little girls. Really little: Youngsters between ages 2 and 7 years old. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5867685&view=rss&microfeed=true

Teens continue to put the rest of us to shame for our Netflix watching, internet browsing ways: 16-year-old Amelia Hempleman-Adams has returned home to England after becoming the youngest person to ski the South Pole. Hempleman-Adams and her explorer father traveled 97 miles and spent 17 nights in Antarctica. Temperatures got as low as -58 degrees Fahrenheit, and Hempleman-Adams adds, "The biggest challenges were the freezing cold, dried food, pulling frozen poo in a sledge, Dad's snoring." It should make for one hell of a college admissions essay (especially the frozen poo bit). More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5867540&view=rss&microfeed=true

Recently, we got the following email: More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5865624&view=rss&microfeed=true

Living argument for poll taxes Michele Bachmann is still pulling in dismal numbers, but has not given up in her fight to be remembered as someone who did not win the 2012 Republican Presidential nomination. While her opponents battle each other, her most formidable recent opponent has come in the form of a South Carolina 8-year-old named Elijah. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5865480&view=rss&microfeed=true

The words "girl gang" conjure up images from 1950s pulp novels and drive-in movies, where teenage hellions and "lust-cats of the gutter" clawed at each other (sexily) and every now and then someone almost got stabbed. But in today's New York Post , Brad Hamilton writes, "Sister gangs are popping up all over Manhattan, Brooklyn and The Bronx with names such as the Harlem Hiltons, Hood Barbies, Billion Dolla Beauties, Gun Clappin Divas and 2 Gurl Gunnas, police say." This is no sexploitation B-movie; the violence is real and deadly. And in some cases, the internet is where the fights start. The Post also ran a first-person piece from "Kim," a 16-year-old, about her life in a "crew" (headline: "Confessions Of A Switchblade Sister"). Kim says: More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5865166&view=rss&microfeed=true

For the past few years we've been hearing reports about how the kids are sexting themselves silly, leading overzealous law enforcement officials to crowd our sex offender registries with girls who sent out photos of themselves wearing a bra. Now a new study claims that the vast majority of teens have never sent or received a nude photo. We've never known the media to exaggerate stories involving teens and sex in a hysterical fashion, but let's hear the scientists out. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5865006&view=rss&microfeed=true

If you want evidence of how out of control sexual harassment laws have gotten, look no further than the story of a 7-year-old Boston boy who's been accused of sexual assault for kicking a bully in the groin after he choked him and stole his gloves. This ridiculous tale provides a great opportunity to unleash a hearty online rant about the evils of liberalism — unless you stop to consider the facts. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5864948&view=rss&microfeed=true

While we remain convinced that Kansas Governor Sam brownback's policies do indeed suck, today he took the high road by apologizing for the ridiculous controversy over whether 18-year-old Emma Sullivan should repent for insulting him on Twitter. Today he posted on Facebook: More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5863241&view=rss&microfeed=true

There are plenty of reasons to be glad that you aren't in high school anymore. As full-fledged adults, we're no longer forced to write essays about the ATP cycle, running and swimming are strictly voluntary, and we aren't obligated to have a crush at least one member of a boy band. Another bonus: If we feel like making a joke about a politician online, the principal won't call us to his office and demand that we apologize. (Though, depending on your line of work and your employer's feelings on legalizing marijuana, you may end up out of a job. Maybe being all grown up isn't what it's cracked up to be.) More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5862902&view=rss&microfeed=true

In case you missed your chance to buy your 7-year-old a crotchless thong, K-Mart in Australia offered for sale girls' thong underwear emblazoned with positive slogans like "I ♥ Rich Boys," "I ♥ Boys In Uniform," and "Call Me." More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5861906&view=rss&microfeed=true

It's Black Friday again, so I guess everyone, especially parents, will be running around like a bunch of assholes looking for the Hot Shit Holiday Toy of 2011/12. Normally I would have slept right through this day without so much as a raised smirk in its honor, so oblivious to the hassle I was. See, it's a multi-part hate. It sounds like it would be a really cool day, like, a low-key, turn inward, black on the outside ‘cause black is how I feel on the inside kinda thing. Only it's the opposite of that. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5861584&view=rss&microfeed=true

It's a strange, cold, rainy day here at the Jezebel headquarters, but something about this video gives us hope and strength and positive vibes. Want more? Click here and here. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5860649&view=rss&microfeed=true

We now have a third case of a parent being charged for letting their child drive, making this 2011's official hot trend in reckless parenting! (Now that we have a winner, you can stop letting your kids play with those retro lawn darts you found at a garage sale.) In an unusual twist, Tammy Oneal, the mom in question, didn't let her 9-year-old son drive to school because she was too drunk or anything, but because he really, really wanted to. Many witnesses say they saw the boy pulling into the parking lot of his elementary school earlier this week. Oneal told police that he begged her to let him drive the quarter-mile to school, and she knew he was up to the task because he's been practicing driving in a field since he was five. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5860413&view=rss&microfeed=true

Despite the fact that TV shows like Glee are corrupting children by teaching them that it's cool to have protected sex with your long-term partner, according to a new study from the CDC, the number of teens losing their virginity has dropped drastically in the last decade. Unfortunately, the CDC still has no idea why kids' passion for illicit fornication has waned, so the study's usefulness is limited. However, it's still a great opportunity for adults to theorize about what could possibly be going through teens' heads, much like when someone over 30 tries to figure out what the kiddies see in Justin Beiber. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5859997&view=rss&microfeed=true

A new store in a Colorado's Greeley Mall has agreed to stop selling pairs of thong underwear after parents questioned what the panties were were doing in a place called Kids N Teen. Erin French, who recorded video of the frilly undergarments, says that while in the store with her daughter and son, "we saw crotchless panties, and I was mortified. My first initial response was, 'Am I really seeing that?'" It's a bit unclear from her grainy cell phone video, but it appears that the store was selling tiny thongs with a split down the crotch. The owner defended herself by saying 25% of her merchandise is for teens. If the underwear that's obviously meant to be used during sex was intended for a 14-year-old's wardrobe, that's a different story. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5859560&view=rss&microfeed=true

As you'll recall, last month police pulled over a 9-year-old Michigan girl who was acting as her allegedly inebriated father's designated driver. She told cops, "What did you stop me for? I was driving good," making this a confusingly adorable criminal act. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5858104&view=rss&microfeed=true

A Redditor dad says his son Frankie asked him to put on "Smooth Criminal" while he did the dishes, and when he peeked back into the kitchen he witnessed a performance that puts Snow White and her woodland creatures to shame. Dad says that though Frankie was momentarily embarrassed, now that the video is going viral he's excited. He adds, "I laughed because I busted him — I did not laugh at his dancing. We do a lot of dancing in this house, we encourage expression, and besides — those moves were awesome. How could I laugh at those with anything but delight?" More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5857312&view=rss&microfeed=true

Last week, Michigan finally passed anti-bullying legislation, but don't break out the party hats and start blaring the Lady Gaga music just yet. At the last minute, Republicans inserted a line into the legislation that exempts anyone who makes a comment based on their religious beliefs. Republicans say they're against seeing children get taunted, but felt it was important to protect the right to tell a gay kid that they're going to rot in hell. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5856974&view=rss&microfeed=true

President Obama had a tremendous amount of support from young people in 2008, but like many other Americans their fondness for Obama is waning. Many Millennials were convinced that Obama would bring hope, change, and possibly a unicorn that poops cans of Red Bull, but since he only passed health care reform, ended Don't Ask, Don't Tell, and oversaw the killing of Osama Bin Laden, they're sorely disappointed. Now if Obama wants to win another term in office, he may have to convince young voters that he's still capable of meeting their unrealistic expectations. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5856905&view=rss&microfeed=true

Guess where this happened? Florida! Specifically Fort Myers. It all started because the bus driver told the unnamed fourth grader to stop eating candy on the bus. On Halloween! Come on. I think we all know that asking a kid not to eat candy on Halloween is like requesting that a junkie not do any herion when that junkie is high on heroin and surrounded by heroin on a holiday celebrating heroin. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5855292&view=rss&microfeed=true