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Spencer Pratt wasn't invited to last night's Hills finale event at The Roosevelt Hotel, so he attempted to sneak in by wearing a fat suit and old man makeup. His costume, JustinBobby, Kelly Cutrone and more after the jump. More »
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There have always been dicks, douchebags and asses. But it's only in our time that the pursuit of assholery has become not just acceptable but a quality — nay, a full-time job to which individuals strive. Will it ever end? More »
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• A photo has surfaced of Jessica Simpson out with Billy Corgan of the Smashing Pumpkins on Friday night. A source says they're "officially dating... she has fallen hard and is smitten."

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Last night: Spencer found a pregnancy test in his trash, and told a friend, "I'm gonna have the kind of kid that's gonna grow up and just try to kill me. I can just feel that." He might be right! More »
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On last night's episode, Speidi continued their fake marital dramz by fighting over if and when they'll have children. Spencer decided to snip the problem in the balls by visiting a urologist for a vasectomy. More »
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On last night's episode, Kristin and Audrina had a staged confrontation at Heidi's staged birthday party over Kristin's staged relationship with JustinBobby. But the real excitement was the return of Jen Bunny! More »
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On last night's episode, Brody's girlfriend threw him a surprise birthday party, which his mom Linda attended. She's so Amy Poehler in Mean Girls—these kids keep her young! (As do plastic surgery and lollipops.) More »
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• Radar Online reports that Heidi Klum gave birth to her fourth child, a daughter named Lou Samuel, early this morning. Us however, insists it isn't true, but labor is imminent. This shouldn't be so complicated, people. [Radar Online, Us]

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Now that Kristin has joined the cast of The Hills, things are already changing, like the fact that JustinBobby has lost all his cool cache, and resorts to flirting by asking girls their sign. Oh, and also, Stephanie Pratt's schnozz. More »
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MTV has released an extended trailer for the new season of The Hills, premiering September 29. Kristin pretends to destroy everyone's lives, Heidi pretends to have baby fever, and Spencer really wears a cowboy hat all season. More »
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A Vancouver artist is showing pastel drawings of Hills stars, including this soulful JustinBobby and an appropriately vacuous Audrina. She also does watercolors of characters from Dynasty. [JDBRecords] More »
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• Kim Kardashian on Jessica Simpson's body: "Call me crazy, but when I saw the picture, I was like, 'Oh my God, Jessica looks hot!'" Kim continues:

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• A stupid psychic has made some predictions for 2009: Michelle Williams will wed Neil Patrick Harris, Jen and Angelina will co-star in a movie and Tina Fey will fight Sarah Silverman. [Page Six]

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So that rumor about how Lauren supposedly hooked up with JustinBobby behind Audrina's back finally made it onto the show. Lauren denies it and is now mad at Audrina for even asking her about it, as is JustinBobby, who said that the whole thing was "immature, dude" and got up and walked away after avoiding Audrina's calls and texts for days. For people who say they didn't do anything wrong, their reactions are pretty strong. Apparently, the whole thing started when someone named Dino — who is never seen on the show, but mentioned several times — told Audrina "in detail" about the alleged hookup. (Dino is totally to The Hills what Tino was to My So-Called LIfe.") Tearful confrontation clip above. More »
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On last night's episode of The Hills, Audrina and Lauren went out for a drink together for the first time since Audrina moved out. You'd think any roommate tension that used to be between them would have dissipated, but there was still some weirdness in the air when Audrina spoke about boyfriend JustinBobby and the changes he's going through. (He's so over the L.A. club scene.) What do you think is going on behind Lauren's sun-damaged eyes? Are there any truth to the rumors that she's into JB and they've hooked up? It would be pretty outlandish, since she's such a severe territory marker, and doesn't permit her friends to even look at a guy she's Frenched. More »
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On last night's episode of The Hills, JustinBobby showed up at Audrina's fake job — she was in the recording studio with Brandy, whose career must be in dire straights if she's hittin' up The Hills for publicity — to tell her that he wants to "be with" her. Notice that he doesn't say anything about exclusivity, which is what Audrina had been holding out for. So anyway, his stupid, transparent tactic (he only wants to "be with" her because she was off "being with" someone else) worked, and now they're back together…for now. We wonder if the whole Lauren-Frenches-JustinBobby scandal will be featured on the show somehow. Clip above. More »
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On last night's episode of The Hills, the gang — meaning, the people paid to hang out with one another in beautiful locations scouted by the producers — went to Cabo for Brody's birthday. Even though JustinBobby isn't really dating/screwing around on Audrina anymore, he still got to go. Once he found out that she's seeing someone else, he got hurt, decided to be a baby and tease her for the entire trip. The first night, he stole that stupid Claire's flower ponytail holder she was wearing and refused to give it back for the rest of the trip. In the scenes from next week, we see that this tactic may have worked, and Audrina takes him back, proving once again that JustinBobby is at once both a moron and a pussy wizard. Clip above. More »
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Tracy Morgan tells reporters that he thinks Tina Fey's Palin impression is "on the money," but apparently he and his 30 Rock colleague don't spend that much downtime together. "I don't hang out with her," Tracy says. "She's a married mother. She don't hang out with Tracy Morgan." Wrap your mindgrapes around that one! • Elizabeth Hurley is vying for the Gwyneth Paltrow award for most economically tone deaf celebrity: she's developing an organic food line. A new batch of celebrity-created products is exactly what the world needs in its time of financial woe. • Perez claims to have "exclusive" info that L.C. hooked up with Justin Bobby and that Audrina and Lauren are no longer speaking. These are the Hills of our lives. [Us, People, Perez] More »
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• Britney was at a middle school in The Bronx yesterday to present a $10,000 check for the music program. The donation came from Elizabeth Arden, which is behind Brit's fragrances, Believe, Fantasy and Curious. [People]
• Hey, guess who has another perfume coming out in December? [ONTD]
• So yesterday we read that Britney wanted to buy her sex tape from Adnan Ghalib. Today Adnan says: "There is no sex tape. I'm extremely upset and taking legal action." Um, against whom? Also, even if there is no "sex" tape, there's no doubt he has some footage of her dazed and naked. You just know it. Think about the state she was in back then. [The Sun]
• Oh here we go, more quotes from Adnan: "There is no sex tape, and I've never claimed there is one. I don't know where these quotes I'm supposed to have said have come from. What I do know is they certainly didn't come from me and they are completely false. I'm extremely upset and distressed and I'm taking legal action... This story has caused a lot of hurt to my family and people close to me. There is no sex tape. That is the end of the matter." [Star]
• OMFG: Did LC hook up with JustinBobby behind Audrina's back??? [E!]

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Despite all of Charlotte's Cosmo-swilling, Kristin Davis is sober, and has been since before her stint on Sex and the City. "I’m a recovering alcoholic. I’ve never hid it, but I’ve been sober the whole time I’ve been famous, so it wasn’t like I had to go to rehab publicly," Davis told Health magazine. • Audrina and Justin Bobby are maybe back together. "If things get hard I always go back to Justin," Aud tells Us. The Hills are alive with the sound of boredom. • Britney Spears is allegedly in talks to perform at the Palms Casino in Vegas for a tidy sum. Hey, Celine Dion did it! [Celebitchy,Us, Dlisted] More »
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Is there ever not friendship tension expressed in awkward silence between the girls on The Hills? Lo is clearly getting territorial towards Lauren, a battle that is made easier for her by Audrina living in the guest house. Shockingly, Audrina was able to confide in JustinBobby about the whole thing, and instead of burping in her face, he played the part of the sweet and understanding BF (or whatever), offering advice. (Just when you thought things couldn't get any more Bizarro on that show.) Clip above. More »
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JustinBobby came back on the scene on last night's episode of The Hills, and we couldn't be happier. Of course, Lauren got all pissed off about it, because she makes a big stinkin' deal out of having both friend and boyfriend approval of the people she lives with. Particularly awkward was fact that both Heidi and JustinBobby had the nerve to occupy Audrina's time in a public place while at the same table as Lauren. And even more awkward was that bitchy, passive-aggressive roommate conversation that Lo, Lauren and Audrina had over brunch. Clip above. More »
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• OK, so the latest on the soap opera-esque tale of Nina Garcia is that she's been offered the part-time title of Editor-at-Large by the peeps at ELLE because they want her to stay on-board because she made ELLE famous because of Project Runway and let's face it, print is dying anyway and needs all the free press it can get. Also, Nina won't be able to remain a judge on Project Runway unless she's still affiliated with ELLE. Follow? Yeah, we really don't either but we're sorta hoping Nina will say thanks-but-not-thanks and pen a tell-all instead. [WWD, 1st item]

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• MTV
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Oh my god, you guys, the new season of The Hills looks aaaamazing. Lauren and Whitney are in gay Pareeee! Brody gets a cunty new girlfriend! Lauren has a fake rebound fling with a long-haired Frenchy! Stephanie Pratt is back in the house! Spencer and Heidi pretend to break up! Justin Bobby returns! And, according to the tagline: "Everything has changed." Though, um, it sort of seems like everything is the exactly same — except Lauren's hair is a mite darker. But whatever! We will be collectively holding our breath until the March 24 premiere. More »
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• Okay, get ready for this: The UK'sNews Of The World alleges that, the night she ended up in the hospital, Britney Spears took 10 sleeping pills, 12 Vicodins, six Ritalins and 10 Zantacs — and washed them all down with her "purple drank", i.e. vodka, NyQuil and Red Bull. She also supposedly phoned her sister and shouted, "You're not going to be the only fucking Spears on the front cover of a magazine next week!" As for reports that Brit will be on Dr. Phil, a source says, "Based on the interaction between Dr. Phil and Britney . . . it'll be a cold day in hell before Britney goes on his show." [New York Post]

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