Judging the New Real Housewives of Atlanta Taglines

Season 7 of The Real Housewives of Atlanta premieres this Sunday, which means we’ll be treated to a new set of taglines for the opening sequence. Let’s judge them.

Here’s what we’ll be hearing at the start of each episode all season long:

Nene Leakes

New Tagline: “Why be so nasty and so rude — when I can be so fierce and so successful.”
Last Season: “Success is in my DNA. When one door closes, another one opens.”
Which Is Better: New one. Nene manages to mention her success, her evolution from evil to a little less evil, and even throw in an M dash.

Phaedra Parks

New Tagline: “When it comes to my family, I’m the judge and the jury.”
Last Season: “A true southern belle knows her worth, and I am priceless.”
Which Is Better: Tied. Phaedra is good at this.

Cynthia Bailey

New Tagline: “Life is about choices — and I choose Cynthia.”
Last Season: “My business is beauty, and I’m the boss.”
Which Is Better: New one. ‘Cause I like to think she has a friend contract with herself.

Kandi Burruss

New Tagline: “I’m not about the drama. Don’t start none, won’t be none.”
Last Season: “Music may be my passion, but family is forever.”
Which Is Better: Old one. But both are yawn.

Kenya Moore

New Tagline: “People get exhausted trying to figure me out. And I just let them.”
Last Season: “People may think they have me figured out, but I am always the wild card.”
Which Is Better: Did she even try?

Poor Porsha Williams is featured in the trailer but not the credits. The new castmember Claudia Jordan’s tagline is: “Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful. Hate me because I’m here to stay.” We’ll see.