Oof, I'm not one for group exercise and I have a feeling this might be why. (Or maybe it just adds to the borderline anxiety.) Joyce Wadler at the New York Times has a pretty intense and hilarious 'report' on the insanity that is Spin Class. From "potassium-infused coconut bladderwrack" energy drinks to the incessant wiping, it's enough to keep those of us who have been blessed not to have endured such a torture far, far away.

"When class is over, do not leave the gym for 15 minutes. That way when you collapse, our specially trained instructors will be there to call 911. (It also ensures that unattractive strangers will not be stepping over your body.)

Don't we all feel more confident now?

Great. Let me hear you holler, "Yeah!" Holler like the warrior/athlete/robo-commandos you are, not the pasty little wuss you used to be."

Thanks but no thanks. I'll stick to yoga and running down the stairs to get my Seamless order.