What...what is this strange sensation? A tingling in the extremities, a refracted brightness on the edge of sight, an ungraspable warmth bubbling up from the secret places of the earth...what wizardry is brewing inside me? Am I myself? Was I just...delighted by a Gosselin-related news story? WHAT NEW WORLD IS THIS?
Jon Gosselin—epic eye roller, bumbling tax avoider, alleged extortionist, eternal shrinking violet—told Entertainment Tonight last night that he's currently waiting tables in a restaurant and living in a rural Pennsylvania cabin without TV or internet. This is obviously amazing. Like, god forbid somebody who was once on the television get an actual human-being job where they perform services in exchange for money and then use that money to pay for things such as rent and food! What's next—white people going to jail!?!?