"We're inspired by women who have restarted their lives using health and fitness. We hope you are too," Gwyneth Paltrow and her BFF Tracy Anderson explain in the introduction to their new AOL web series The Restart Project. They're so inspired that they want to make sure it shows on their mostly unbotoxed faces.
The Restart Project includes profiles of a mother who lost her son in the army and took up Karate again as a way to remember him, a breast cancer survivor who changed her health habits after she found out her husband was cheating on her with the neighbor's babysitter and a young woman whose leg had to be amputated after a car accident who started running marathons. While many of the stories are definitely #inspiring, every time the camera cuts to Gwyneth walking across the same lawn or Tracy Anderson trying to pretend she has human emotions it's like a record has skipped and all you can assume is that the given fit blonde is thinking OMG HERE IS MY FACE WHICH I WILL MOVE INTO AN EXAGGERATED EXPRESSION THAT IS HOPEFULLY DISPLAYING SOME VARIATION OF SHOCK AND AWE SO THAT I COME ACROSS AS CARING.
"You lost a person!" Tracy exclaims to a woman who has lost a significant amount of weight. "I lost a you!" she responds. "You lost a me!" Tracy agrees, adding, "Amazing, I mean think of carrying around me all day."
[Your suffering does not compute.]
[No seriously, it does not compute.]
Peace. Tranquility. Seriousness. Yoga. My many Oscar dresses.
"My main thought was that no one would love me and I wasn't sexy." - Young woman who has lost her leg.
[Still does not compute]
"Isn't it amazing what we do as women, the order on the totem pole that we put ourselves?" - Gwyneth to a woman whose husband left her after she had supported him financially while battling cancer.
"I can't imagine how you're still standing up. I think I would die." - Gwyneth to a woman who had lost her son.
This is Tracy Anderson pretending she likes cheese.
"Elizabeth, looking and you and your gorgeous fit body, I can't fathom how you were once obese?" - Gwyneth to a woman who was formerly obese.
Screenshots via The Restart Project/AOL