"Princeton Mom" Susan Patton has been everywhere lately spouting her controversial (if "controversial" = laughably old-timey) views about how young women should be focusing less on their careers and more on nailing down eligible bachelors and earning their MRS.

"Work will wait. Your fertility won't," she told Savannah Guthrie during her appearance on Today earlier this March.

Patton's advice has been mostly aimed at college women who, according to her, are all too invested in their educations and are not giving enough thought "the extraordinary concentration of men that they have to choose from" at their universities.


True enough, Susan Patton! Nary a day goes by where I don't regret concentrating on earning my degree rather than shacking up with one of the chodes at the University of Wisconsin business school, but couldn't you take your argument even farther?

Most women start attending co-ed schools long before college, so why should a girl wait until she's an ancient 19 year old before finding a husband? Enter the Daily Show's Kristen Schaal with K-Date, America's first dating site for kindergarteners.


Lock those spouses down early, girls. Learning your ABCs can wait. Your fertility won't.