It would be unfair to call these flower commercials from FTD the most boring Valentine's Day commercials out this year, but they're certainly missing consistent campiness of Kay Jewelers or the over-the-top insanity of K-Y Couples Lubricant.

Florists' Transworld Delivery is a midwestern-based company that's been around for a hundred years. You may also remember them as one of the companies that had difficulty actually delivering people their flowers on time a few years ago. Mark Duffy at Vice calls them "the whitest Valentine's Day ads ever" and points out something else important:

Know that these four couples were carefully culled from somewhere in the neighborhood of 50–60 auditions and picked to represent a $600 million company for their most important two weeks of the year.

Was the money worth it? (The answer is always no.) But which one is your favorite? The couple who can't decide whether they're giving gifts this year? The man who gives his partner a parrot? The man who reads a weird poem? The couple who recounts the year their Valentine's Day ended in food poisoning?

(The only correct answer is parrot.)