Dude Would Rather Date Scarlett Johansson's Voice Than a Real WomanS

Oh great, another movie about a dude who's SO DESERVING OF LOVE but just can't his shit together enough to date a real woman.

This time, it's the Spike Jonze-directed Her, a film that stars Joaquin Phoenix as a dude who falls in love with his phone's operating system. The trailer is entertaining, I guess, and Scarlett Johansson sounds great as Samantha (AKA hot sexy hot sexy sexy Siri), but do we really need another fantasy movie filmed by a white man about white men who will never find the perfect woman? Partly because she doesn't exist and partly because if she does, she's a computer—a subservient robot with a sexy voice who laughs at all your jokes and takes care of your scheduling.

(Tuesday 9am: Get your shit together, bro.)