Stars who’ll be dancing with other stars

Mischa Barton, Geraldo Rivera and Jodie Sweetin are among the confirmed celebrities who’ll be depressingly floating around a dance floor while secretly contemplating the trajectory of their careers (and entertaining us!) on the next season of Dancing With the Stars.

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Following the usual batch of leaks about would-be participants, ABC revealed the full season 22 lineup, which includes these extremely familiar faces you definitely know intimately:

  • Mischa Barton with Artem Chigvintsev
  • Antonio Brown with Sharna Burgess
  • Nyle DiMarco with Peta Murgatroyd
  • Kim Fields with Sasha Farber
  • Doug Flutie with Karina Smirnoff
  • Marla Maples with Tony Dovolani
  • Von Miller with Witney Carson
  • Wanya Morris with Lindsay Arnold
  • Geraldo Rivera with Edyta Sliwinska
  • Jodie Sweetin with Keo Motsepe
  • Paige VanZant with Mark Ballas
  • Ginger Zee with Valentin Chmerkovskiy

Doug Flutie! Paige VanZant! Of course, why not them?

Here’s a quote from our resident DWTS expert Joanna reporting from the sidelines: “For me, this season of DWTS is heavy on the who? factor since like a third of the contestants are football-adjacent (more like whoball),” she says. “Insane-wise, I’d rank this season a 7 because of Mischa, Marla Maples, Geraldo and Nyle, who I’m sure will all have rehearsals that end in tears. There are a lot of strong men, but no war heroes, so, there’s that. My top 3 prediction is Nyle/Peta, Antonio/Sharna and Paige/Mark Ballas—I would bet one thousand dollars on that.”

Agreed, Nyle—the first and only deaf cast member/winner of what was supposed to be the final season of America’s Next Top Model—could be a wild card. There’s also Jodie, who’s experiencing either a good or bad resurgence thanks to the awful Fuller House. I’m anxious to see how Boyz II Men’s Wanya Morris holds up, as well as Kim Fields, who joined the latest season of Real Housewives of Atlanta and seems to be okay with that decision.

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Geraldo doesn’t stand a chance.


Contact the author at clover@jezebel.com.