Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Last night in Los Angeles, the stars gathered for the MTV Movie Awards, also known as the most fake, most C-list, most staged, most irrelevant of the movie awards.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Let's begin with the dudes. This was not an occasion for tuxedos. Nick Lachey, Seth Rogen and Miles Teller kept it real casual. Ansel Elgort looked as though he may have been quite warm.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

More casual: Parks and Rec's Chris Pratt, Neighbors star Dave Franco, Entourage's Jerry Ferrara.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Carefully disheveled: Hunger Games's Sam Clafin. Dapper but dark: Entourage's Adrian Grenier. Sharp as a knife: Captain America's Anthony Mackie.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Adorable Teen Wolf star Dylan O'Brien is adorable. Meanwhile, how can Teen Wolf's Tyler Hoechlin look so so so hot (no really, click that link) on the show and then wear that hideous, repellent jacket on the red carpet? It's making me question everything about life.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Cute couples: Sara Gilbert and Linda Perry; Jenni "JWoww" Farley and Roger Matthews; Hayley Roberts and David Hasselhoff.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Seana Gorlick and Teen Wolf's Tyler Posey, Conan O'Brien and Liza Powel, Zac Efron and his Social Media Manager LaQuishe Wright.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Backstreet's back. Alright?

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Crisp, bright, structured white: Rocsi Diaz, Ellie Goulding.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Like a 1930s Hollywood starlet lounging in her boudoir: Satin bodysuit and sheer duster/robe for Rihanna.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Iggy Azalea wore sky-high wedges and an unforgiving frock.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Springy, breezy crop tops and skirts: Jessica Alba, Karina Smirnoff.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Pretty pale dresses for Chrissy Teigen and Teen Wolf's Holland Roden.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Bright and tight: Disney Channel's Bella Thorne; Nickelodeon's Victoria Justice.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Shiny shiny Pia Mia looked like she should be leaning on a 1959 T-Bird.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Rocking a zillion colors, cool shoes and flawless makeup: Lupita Nyong'o.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Zendaya of the Disney Channel and Dancing With the Stars looked fab in a bold floral print.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

More prints and patterns: Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi; Vampire Diaries star Kat Graham.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Dotty: Leslie Mann, contortionist.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Loathe this baby-diarrhea-hued leather monstrosity on Shailene Woodley. Hair and makeup? Gorgeous. Dig the shoes, too.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Dramatic black gowns: Disney Channel's Debby Ryan and singer Rita Ora.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

My favorite ensemble of the night? The get-up poured upon Nicki Minaj. Stripped of all the wigs and bells and whistles. A nice change from this. Sleek modern goddess in a partially sheer body-conscious dress and bold gold jewelry. Killed it dead.

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Hideous Dresses and Cool Shoes at the MTV Movie Awards

Images via Getty.