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No Shades of Gray Rape
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shades of gray rape
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No Shades of Gray Rape
The Cosmos
Cosmo's August 'Conversation Starter' Might Start Some Pretty Strange Conversations!
The new issue of Cosmo is here! And before we delved into what promises to be a riveting interview with Scarlett Johansson, we sated our thirst for "Conversation Starters," the monthly feature in which Cosmo editors offer up little tidbits of trivia that promise to "make you the most interesting person in the room — by far." Last month we learned about doga — yoga! for dogs! — and the contracts some brides-to-be are now dispensing to their bridesmaids prohibiting them from gaining weight. But this month…well, pushed the envelope just a bit further! Click for August's "perfect icebreaker"… More »
no shades of gray rape
The Rape Conviction Rate In Britain Is Pathetically Low
Less than 6% of rapes reported in England lead to convictions — and that's out of as few as 10% of rapes that are reported in the first place. I'm no mathematician, but the good people at the Washington Post have underscore the fact that those statistics are deplorable. The well-researched article by the Post's Mary Jordan is bookended by the tale of a 15-year-old London teen who was raped by a 28-year-old neighbor. Her mother immediately called the police, and yet it took several months for the police to question the rapist. The man was eventually set free, although he had a previous criminal record; the judge in the case said, he was "in a way a man of good character" because his prior convictions were non-violent. This is clearly not an isolated event, as a 2005 report commissioned by UK police described a "culture of skepticism" surrounding rape cases. And the horrors don't end there! More »
dear stabby
That Dear Abby "My Brother Raped My Wife" Thing Actually Happened (And It Was Legal!?)
Here's a familiar familial tale! Remember the one about the woman who's fast asleep in her room when suddenly a man she thinks is her husband comes in and they have sex only to at some later point realize that it was actually her husband's perverted brother? Yes, Dear Abby got a query about this a few weeks back, and she didn't believe the story, so we got all ragey about that, and then Dan Savage said he, too, disbelieved the story, and we unleashed some lite venom on him, but by that point our faith in our own instincts was somewhat shaken. So imagine how very gratified we are to report to you now that the media has confirmed it: masquerading as your brother to rape her girl is actually a new trend! It happened — basement apartment and all! — to Marissa Lee-Fuentes. More »
shades of gray (rape)
Academic "Explains" Why College Men Hear "Yes" When Women Mean "No"
The most commonly used statistics about sexual assault and American college women show that 25% of female college students will be sexually assaulted; U.C. Davis professor of communication Michael Motley believes that at least some unwanted sexual contact is due to misunderstanding on the part of men — which he calls "faulty male introspection" — and unintentionally vague statements on the part of women. Motley said in a press release, "When she says, 'It's getting late,' he may hear, 'So let's skip the preliminaries.'" Motley performed an experiment where he gave 30 female and 60 male Davis students a questionnaire asking them to interpret "16 common female resistance messages." And his results may surprise you. More »
the rape report
Is Some Rape Just Like Force-Feeding An Anorexic Chocolate Cake?
Rape is back in the news. You can now officially withdaw consent during sex in Maryland and if he keeps doing it anyway you can call it rape. This is very good news for girls who get drugged, and because they don't remember how they got there in the first place, can't provide the best testimony and get their cases dropped by the D.A. But it's also good news for anyone who drinks, a fact I was reminded of by a recent scandal over a British politico who wrote on his blog that the rape of a husband by a wife was akin to force-feeding her chocolate cake. (There's a photo of this guy after the jump!) More »
raped of its meaning
How Did "No Means No" Become A Fun Rape Joke?
Hey, look at the T-shirt! It says "No Means No (Well, maybe if I'm drunk.)" Is this an overly, like, Jezebel thing to write a post about? Whatever! It's Friday! Okay, sooooo, "No means no." See the period? Affirmative? Good. After a few drinks and maybe a blow job, you can add another sentence. Such as: "Oh who am I kidding, I have no self-control." Or: "Okay, enough with your dick in my mouth, I changed my mind." Or: "What with the increased bloodflow in the direction of my gonads I am going to have to reconsider that stance." Those and numerous other statements would, in effect, render void and inapplicable the preceding "No." The fact that the word "no" had been uttered prior to the consent, for whatever reason, is moot. And yet! Somehow the often-amusing, eminently human phenomenon that is changing one's mind as to one's amenability to sex with an individual, a process men and women experience with frequency, has been twisted into an excuse for rape. Successfully twisted, we should add: even if the whole "one in four women gets raped in college" is exaggerated, uh...it is one in four. More »
shades of gray (rape)
Conservative Critic: College Rape Statistics Are Overinflated
Heather MacDonald, a fellow at the conservative think tank the Manhattan Institute, had an essay in yesterday's Los Angeles Times railing against the "phony" rape epidemic on America's college campuses. MacDonald claims that the statistic used by many university rape crisis centers — 20-25% of college women will be sexually victimized — is grossly over-inflated. The statistic, she says, comes from a 1988 study commissioned by Ms., in which a researcher, Mary Koss, classified things as rape that the respondents didn't construe as rape themselves. Writes MacDonald: "One question, for example, asked, 'Have you had sexual intercourse when you didn't want to because a man gave you alcohol or drugs?' — a question that is ambiguous on several fronts, including the woman's degree of incapacitation, the causal relation between being given a drink and having sexual intercourse, and the man's intentions." More »
facebook fatwas
"Morgan Shaw-Fox Is A Piece Of Shit Rapist"
Blood-boiling-yet-fascinating college rape vigilante justice story time! This time our campus is Monica Lewinsky alma mater Lewis & Clark in Portland, Oregon and the alleged rapist a charismatic aspiring actor and a cappella singer named Morgan "Morgazm" Shaw-Fox. (Words used by various female students to describe him: "magic," "sexual", "hot" and "good at drawing people in." Groan.) Anyway, Helen Hunter had decided a year before that she didn't really want to date him — he had pressured her into cooking Ramen for him, which she did, and giving him head, which she didn't — but one night she drunk-texted him, and despite the warnings of her roommate's boyfriend, she went over. And then"It started happening, and then he, like, twisted his fingers around my hair and started pulling it and being just kind of violent. I started choking because he was just, like, pushing my head.... I started gagging and choking, and I couldn't really breathe. "She says she started pushing on Shaw-Fox's abdomen to tell him to stop. "And he was like, 'Yeah, that's right, choke on it.'"More »
(shades of) gray rape
British Politician Says Date Rape Is No Big Whoop
Former Tory Minister of Parliament John Redwood has much of Britain up in arms this week over comments he made about date rape. In a blog post published last Friday, the politician, a crony of Conservative party leader David Cameron, slammed the opposing Labour Party for its "doctrine of equivalence", which treats stranger rape and acquaintance rape in the same fashion. "None of us want men to rape women," Redwood, (shown golfing above), writes, "but there is a difference between a man using unreasonable force to assault a woman on the street, and a disagreement between two lovers over whether there was consent on one particular occasion when the two were spending an evening or night together." More »
(shades of) gray rape
In British Date Rape "Adverts", Rapist & Victim Look The Same
The greater The Manchester, England police department launched two date rape awareness ads yesterday, hoping to show that "sexual assaults often take place between newly-made acquaintances or with people who know each other and often when they've had a drink." While the intent is admirable, the actual commercials leave a lot to be desired. There are two versions of the ad, one from the woman's point of view, one from the man's, and, as you'll see above, the reactions of the rapist and victim are identical: They're both shot staring guiltily at the bathroom mirror, which seems to imply that a victim of sexual assault should feel ashamed or humiliated. In addition, the commercial seems to be blaming alcohol for the entire scenario, which totally absolves the perpetrator of any real accountability in this gray rape.
TV Advert To Warn Men Over Rape [BBC]
Police Launch Rape Awareness TV Campaign [Greater Manchester Police]
Earlier: 'Cosmo' Wonders: Is It Rape If You Had Too Many Jaeger Shots To Remember It Anyway?
live nude rape!
The Big Brother Africa house played host to a castmate-on-castmate rape, and they're airing it on TV. This is, to say the least, a controversy. It starts with the fact that the assailant, a 24-year-old married Tanzanian film student named Richard Bezuidenhout, did not use his penis but his finger to penetrate his housemate, a 29-year-old Nigerian medical assistant named Ofunneka Molokwu, an offense that, as in most countries, is considered rape in South Africa, where the Big Brother Africa house is located, because South Africa has a much-publicized "rape culture", which is one reason some are advocating the airing of this special moment, and also presumably the reason Bezuidenhout defended his actions to his housemates by saying, "Well, this is Africa." Another charming Bezuidenhout moment: he apparently retreated and was filmed drunkenly sniffing his fingers.
More »
Big Brother Contestant On Fingering That Passed Out Housemate: "Well, This Is Africa"
The Big Brother Africa house played host to a castmate-on-castmate rape, and they're airing it on TV. This is, to say the least, a controversy. It starts with the fact that the assailant, a 24-year-old married Tanzanian film student named Richard Bezuidenhout, did not use his penis but his finger to penetrate his housemate, a 29-year-old Nigerian medical assistant named Ofunneka Molokwu, an offense that, as in most countries, is considered rape in South Africa, where the Big Brother Africa house is located, because South Africa has a much-publicized "rape culture", which is one reason some are advocating the airing of this special moment, and also presumably the reason Bezuidenhout defended his actions to his housemates by saying, "Well, this is Africa." Another charming Bezuidenhout moment: he apparently retreated and was filmed drunkenly sniffing his fingers.
More »
British researcher Joanna Bourke takes a look at the cultural interpretations of rape in her new book Rape: A History From 1860 To The Present. Turns out she's having just as much trouble as the the rest of us in defining "rape" in any definitive manner. Says the Independent: "Bourke's own working definition of rape as whatever anyone - whether 'participant' or 'third party' - thinks of as rape is so broad as to render impossible any general argument about one specifiable crime. The book's pointedly gray cover already makes it seem more likely that Bourke's history of rape will be at pains to avoid simple black-and -white categories of judgment." Even the cover is gray. How's that for literally illustrated ambivalence? [The Independent]
no shades of gray rape
Date Raped In D.C.? Apparently, "No Means No" Only At The Hospital
A college student is filing suit against her school and bunch of hospitals that allegedly denied her the courtesy of a rape kit after she was drugged and anally date raped. They denied her service, you see, because she appeared intoxicated. (!!!) This news comes to us from the sheltered conservative campus of George Washington University in that Bible Belt enclave known as Washington D.C. Now, to the hospitals' credit, she was vomiting — ew! — and had two friends with her to take care of her so she really didn't need their help anyway, and seriously it's not like weekend nights in D.C. are short on crime victims so you can sort of see an ER worker in blood-spattered scrubs surveying the drunky freshman from the other side of town and thinking, "Let's be honest, neither one of us wants me to spend an hour probing your ass right now." But then, like the responsible freshman some of us would definitely not be, she went back the next morning! More »
We weren't the only ones who attended Cosmo's gray rape panel yesterday. Sewell Chan, the thorough and prolific NY Times boy wonder, included an awesome quote from anti-violence activist Joe Samalin: "There were a lot of things in the [gray rape] article that concerned and frustrated me," [Samalin] said. He said that intentionally or not, the article might have the effect of suggesting that "you can be a woman in charge of your own sexuality ... but not too much because these are the consequences that will happen to you." Local free rag Metro also wrote up the event, quoting John Jay women's center director Katie Gentile. "We'd never ask a robbery victim, 'Were you drunk?" Gentile said. "The culture has to change while we change, too." And Feministing got in on the action as well. [New York Times, Metro, Feministing]
shades of gray (rape)
Cosmopolitan's Date Rape Panel: There Are No Shades Of "Gray" When Vomit Is Involved
Remember last month when Moe wrote about gray rape after casual sex avenger and Washington Post scribe Laura Sessions Stepp published that inflammatory article about it in Cosmopolitan? Well, this morning at John Jay College, Cosmo invited Ms. Sessions Stepp, along with legal experts, psychology professors and anti-violence activists, to discuss and define the concept of "gray rape." There had initially been calls for a protest by rape activism groups, but as far as we could tell, no one showed up to storm the auditorium. Expertly-coiffed Court TV talking head Ashleigh Banfield moderated the morass. Ostensibly the purpose of the the panel was to ask the question, "Is there ever a gray area between consent and denial?" What the panel actually established was that no should always mean no. Revolutionary! More »
interview
Can Rapists Get You Off? Our Questions About How Serial Rapist Jeffrey Marsalis Got Away With It, Answered
Prolific Match.com rapist Jeffrey Marsalis was sentenced last Friday on the offenses the Philadelphia jury charged him with since they lacked the balls or sanity or whatever to stick him him with rape. And though most rapists who get away with it aren't suspected of raping over a hundred girls, going easy on sex criminals turns out to be a pretty common occurrence in Philadelphia, which is one of the reasons we decided to interview Philadelphia Magazine writer Dan Lee, whose shocking-yet-unsurprising, depressingly riveting tale of Marsalis's string of victims we blogged about last week. After the jump, we ask Dan — who is, full disclosure, someone with whom we have shared beers/margaritas/embittered rants on the state of the existence-particularly-ours before, about why men don't understand why women try to date their rapists, and whether Marsalis was any good in bed. More »
shades of gray rape
