Jezebel
At the beginning of this month's Jane cover profile 'The Unstoppable Charm of Zooey Deschanel', writer Shelly Ridenour finds herself with the actress at a farmer's market. It's crowded, cluttered with street musicians and "family-run cheesy" but it's also "shiny" and "fresh" and "a little bit too predictable." Sort of, we might venture to say, like Zooey Deschanel, whose stubborn quirkiness is starting to make us wish she'd find a narcotic to abuse. But gosh! Such a cute dresser! (Seriously!) After the jump, all the actress' quirky attributes as pounded into our heads by Jane magazine.
Zooey: Taught herself to play ukelele because "I just think it's cute".
Zooey: Sings on "A Mixtape From Ben Lee".
Zooey: Occasionally performs with a cabaret act she formed called "If all the stars were pretty babies". What does that mean?
Zooey: Is an "amazing whistler".
Zooey: Likes to sing Linda Ronstadt songs at karaoke.
Zooey: Also sings for her friend/ex-boyfriend Jason Schwartzmann's musical project.
jason schwartzman's musical project is called coconut records
Zooey: Goes shopping at a store called "Dream Articles Apparel For People" where she buys a smock and a bunch of cute animal pins. At another store she buys heeled saddle-shoes.
Zooey: Fusses at Jane creative director Marie for smoking.
Zooey: Is unnerved by street musicians.
Zooey: Loves the website "The accent archive" at transbuddha.com.
Zooey: Hates sentence fragments.
Comments
i'm beginning to think she and Miranda July are the same person...
They sell penguins at Farmer's Markets? Can you even eat penguin? Legally, I mean.
Sounds like one incredibly annoying person. Oh, and as for the narcotic abuse - I figure that'll start as soon as she sees the first wrinkle and realizes she can't pull off pigtails and saddles shoes anymore.
"Goes shopping at a store called "Dream Articles Apparel For People""
Bitch already sounds like she's got a narc problem - it's called a sprinkling of coke on my Froot Loops, followed by a glass of OJ laced with liquid LSD for breakfast.
With a name like Zooey she's got to be tripping her tits off.
also, i am kind of hoping she becomes a real life Baby Jane.
What's wrong with LSD? You can't get addicted to LSD, nor is it a narcotic. You take a dose and a day later you are immune, than another day goes buy and you are back to being able to use it again. It is by far, one of the most interesting drugs in existence. It's effects on sight, and persona are interesting enough, but the psychopharmalogical effects themselves are just neat.
@SharonTaint: No... Miranda outquirked -- outcreeped? -- Zooey with the middle-school tag-team blow-job scene in meandyouandeveryoneweknow. But I don't know, maybe the unrated version of bridge to terabithia will prove me wrong.
Ooooo! I know a couple of the transbuddha guys. They'll be pleased to know they're on the quirky hit parade.
287: Sum of numbers on the cover, not including page numbers, dates, or dollars (88, Summer ’07, and $100, respectively) Non-zero: Chance that the blogger who wrote the “something bitchy” about Brandon Holley that she mentions in her “Editor’s Letter” is us. We’ll never know for sure how...
@Monkey4Sale - Thanks for the completely unnecessary drug lesson.
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