DailyCandy editors are putting their sadistic sides on display today. Apparently, there's nothing funnier than faking a crime scene [Actually, that is kind of funny. -Ed.] pinning a man down and shaving him, or watching a pet get tortured. Don't believe us? Judge for yourselves after the jump.

DailyCandy Everywhere thinks we're real sickos and have nothing better to do than staging murders.

DailyCandy Chicago is under the impression that women shave their boyfriends' backs. We're not sure if we're more confused by the idea itself [We thought women prefer picking their boyfriends' zits! Or maybe that's just us! -Ed.] or by the notion that such an act of bonding is intrinsic to the city of Chicago.

DailyCandy London thinks we have 1) money to burn 2) no friends and 3) would like to go in on buying a racehorse with a shitload of strangers.

DailyCandy Los Angeles thinks we're sadists who'd enjoy watching our pets restrained and tortured before our very eyes.

DailyCandy Miami has not an ounce of respect for The Clash.

DailyCandy Seattle thinks that women can't drive without lessons.

DailyCandy
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Earlier: Women Drivers Don't Know Hot To Shift Gears, Start Cars, Or For That Matter, Dress Themselves