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Still looking for the perfect Valentine's Day present for your Mad Men-loving sweetheart? Or better yet, are you looking to buy a very special Valentine's Day gift for yourself? Then do consider sending a Hamm-O-Gram, the only valentine crafted especially with the Jon Hamm fan in mind. More »
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Christmas is over! Now that all the joy (and pain) of spending hours on end with one's family and consuming ungodly amounts of food is wearing off, it's time to go back to thinking about the true meaning of the holiday season: stuff! More »
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In the course of holiday shopping, you'll inevitably come across some gifts you didn't even know existed. But what about the flipside — gifts that really should exist, but for some reason do not? Below, a list of gifts we'd really like to see — manufacturers take note! More »
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Apparently the more elaborate the wrapping, the higher the expectations — and if you're giving a little something simple, you maybe shouldn't wrap it at all. You bet your bows and ribbons Yale University's Center for Customer Insights did a study on this! More »
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In this big bah-humbug world of ours, it's hard to find a story that defies cynicism. But these tales of anonymous "guardian angel" shoppers who have been paying off the KMart layaway balances for poor families trying to buy Christmas presents for their kids is one of those bawl-inducing items that will make even the smallest of hearts grow three sizes. Hope you've been properly stretching and lubricating your tear ducts, because these are doozies. More »
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Whether you've got a drinker or two on your present list, or have judged yourself in need of a little holiday cheer, alcohol is a holiday gift-giving staple. It's widely available, and everyone — well, everyone except maybe alcoholics — loves getting it. Here is a selection of the alcohols I've most enjoyed in the past year, and some alcohol-related accessories that — although never as cool as receiving booze itself — are not dumb. More »
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Apparently Spanx thinks our troops are looking a little less than svelte lately. So they've sent them a thoughtful Christmas present — some shaping undershirts to help them "feel support in a whole new way." More »
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It's tough to buy for the friend who has everything — but what about the friend who hates everything? Never fear: we have suggestions to help you melt your most curmudgeonly buddy's frozen, twisted heart — or at least help her revel in its twistedness. More »
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While the holidays are a season of love and joy and giving and the such, they also entail a routine of obligation and decorum. And no matter how carefully you screen your calls and Facebook friend requests throughout the year, chances are at some point, you'll be stuck buying for someone who sucks. And here's how you do it. More »
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We don't recommend breaking up with your significant other around the holidays. Don't break up with them right before Christmas, right after Christmas, and definitely not on the actual day of Christmas. The same goes for Hannukkah, Kwanzaa, and any other holiday you may be celebrating this December — including New Year's Eve. It is, simply put, a dick move. So let's assume you're gonna be in this thing 'til January, which means you'll be half-assing things it for a bit. And in the process of faking your dedication to the relationship, you'll likely have to buy the poor soul a gift. Herewith, some ideas for what to give your unbeloved this year. More »
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Welcome to this year's Jezebel Gift Guide! I know we haven't been together that long — it's only Dec. 5, after all — but I just got you a little something. No really, it's nothing — unless you got me something really nice, in which case I thought long and hard before carefully selecting it. C'mon, open it! More »
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If you've been looking for the perfect Christmas gift for the protester or internet-lover in your life, look no further: it's the Cop Pepper-Spraying Baby Jesus Christmas sweater! The brilliant work of artist Abbie Heppe, this beautiful sweater's design showcases Lt. John Pike—who became a famous meme (meme-ous?) after casually pepper-spraying a bunch of peaceful protestors at UC Davis—turning his weapon on the ultimate symbol of Christmas, the baby Jesus. It sadly isn't available for sale—at least not yet. But perhaps you can knit one yourself, or if you're not up to that just print out a picture and pin it to a regular Christmas sweater. Then you'll get bonus points for being thrifty. More »
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Holiday season 2011 is quickly approaching, and despite your feeble insistence that no halls be decked prior to Thanksgiving, the holiday buying shit season is in full swing. And with holiday shit buying season comes a confusing barrage of commercials for new toys, some of which immediately strike the sophomoric consumer as — to put it delicately — suggestive. Here's our rundown of toys that look more appropriate for the aisles of Toys in Babeland than Toys 'R' Us. More »
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Johanna Kearns just got a very special gift for her 16th birthday: the red 1989 Toyota Corolla that she was born in. Yes, her parents waited a bit too long to leave for the hospital, and her mother Nancy ended up delivering baby Johanna while crouched in the backseat of the car. This Ohio family seems to have a good sense of humor about the whole thing, and they've even given the car a few nicknames, including the "Birthmobile" and "The Placenta." All these years later, the car has 188,000 miles on it but is still going strong. Of the gift, Johanna says, "I like this car. It's like my baby, even though I'm more like its baby." It may be a little weird to drive around in the car you were born in, but it's definitely better than driving around in the car you were conceived in! More »
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Making your beloved a heart-shaped hardboiled egg is significantly less romantic than, say, giving her red roses. It also might be a rather unsubtle way of saying it's time to reproduce. Still, these eggs are pretty cute. You could also just stop at step four, and give your love a hardboiled butt. More »
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As Mother's Day approaches, the television becomes inundated with commercials for flower delivery, chocolate-covered strawberries, sappy greeting cards and weird heart-shaped pendant necklaces. If you rely on advertising, it's easy to believe that's what moms want. But you know what moms like even more? A little of your time. More »
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Want to discourage your kitty from playing with your bloody tampons? Give her one of her own! The same seller also offers poop and fetus cat toys, just to make sure your cat offends everyone you know. More »
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A midwestern mother received a vacuum cleaner for Christmas, along with a surprise gift of $280K worth of drugs someone had stashed inside. First Clay Matthews's confusing roided-up-Fabio-joins-a-crappy-metal-band hairdo, and now this? Strange things are afoot in Green Bay. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5734909&view=rss&microfeed=true A 42-year-old woman was arrested in Newport Beach, Calif. for stealing delivered packages off the porches of her neighbor's homes. She's not yet been charged with burning down Christmas trees or telling kids Santa doesn't exist, but anything's possible. More »
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The holidays are all about the joy in a child's smile... when she opens the heinously expensive gift she's been pining for. Here are some great gifts for kids that won't result in them shooting their eye out (probably). More »
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Thoughtful gifts for your girlfriend (platonic or romantic) can be more challenging than you'd expect, especially if you've already given her a framed photo of you two. But fear not; herewith are some ideas drawn from our editors' wish lists. More »
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Let's make Christmas all about vampires and '50s ad agencies! We've got gifts for Mad Men enthusiasts, True Blood fangbangers and anyone goo goo for Lady Gaga. Caution: You're gonna want most of this stuff for yourself. More »
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"We look at the world once, in childhood / The rest is memory," as Louise Gluck put it. Here are some gifts that involve looking back. More »
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Still stumped on how to distill your awkward work relationships into inexpensive Secret Santa gifts? Never fear: our office gift guide will help you find the perfect present for the near-strangers you see more than your own family. More »
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Last year, a "strippermobile" full of exotic dancers sparked controversy in Vegas. But this year, the owners filled the vehicle with Santas who gave out gifts to kids. Says the AP, "There was no gyrating or pole dancing this time." More »
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A Welsh teacher is accused of an inappropriate relationship with her female students, after she gave them presents, texted them, and took a shower with them. More »
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A present is an opportunity to show how creative, thoughtful, and generous you are, all with a single well-wrapped package. Or it's a chance to look like a huge ass. Here's how to do the former and avoid the latter. More »
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Today in Social Minefield, our column on the joys and terrors of human interaction, we provide some tips and tricks for one of the most socially challenging occasions of the year: the birthday. More »
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From a preschool's Mother's Day cookbook full of their favorite home-cooked meals: "My favorite thing that my mommy makes me is a hot dog. She wraps it in a paper towel and puts it in the microwave." [WSJ] More »
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Boxing Day sales reportedly attracted a record number of shoppers in the UK — some no doubt returning unwanted shit — which led us to reflect on whether our holiday dreams were fulfilled. More »
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The ad at left, along with a wealth of anecdotal evidence, has us wondering if holiday gift shopping — traditionally women's work, if Cathy is any guide — is especially burdensome for guys. More »
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Unlike some bloggers, we don't get any swag or freebies. And we never leave our apartments. So when word came Down From The Top that we needed a gift guide, we knew our wish-lists would be at least half-fantasy: More »
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'Tis the season. Here are our greatest hits and lowest lows; what are yours? More »
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As Father's Day approaches, guys are complaining about getting the shaft — in terms of presents, and in the weightier matter of reproductive rights. More »
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I gave this "personal library kit" to three bookish young sisters for Christmas, and they loved it. Or at least, they said they did. [New York] More »
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As there is no Saturday Night Live this week, and this weekend in general is a bit wacky, with the upcoming holiday madness, I thought it might be fun to flashback to a simpler time. More »
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The highly annoying PajamaGram commercial - currently in heavy rotation on cable - tries to convince guys the best gift to give their ladyfriends is one that will help them get laid. More »
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We asked, you answered: herewith, the second installment of our Ultimate Terrible Holiday Gift Guide: Things Not to Get the Family. More »
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You know how Tyra wants to be Oprah when she grows up? She's been doing annual holiday gift shows in which she gives tons of presents to the audience. However, she ain't no Winfrey. More »
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