Controversial opinion alert: I don't hate Fox & Friends. Even more controversial opinion alert: I sort of love it. I love it the same way I love The Three Stooges or a group of drunk clowns who won't stop hitting each other in the heads with comedically large hammers. It's a ridiculous circus enacted by performers who don't realize they're in a ridiculous circus. It's hilarious. It's beautiful. It's art.
Take this week's ongoing segment on Millennials, for example. (Related: Fox News has finally learned what a millennial is. God help us all.)
It all started when Fox & Friends correspondent Cheryl Casone offered — via Twitter — to give Millennials job advice. That's nice! Unfortunately, the only Millennials who actually watch Fox & Friends are the ones currently stuck watching TV with their grandparents, but I'm sure those 5 people found this all very helpful.
For "Millennial Mistakes" 2moro @foxandfriends your 20something ?'s answered. Low pay? Bad boss? Reply here or email firstname.lastname@example.org— Cheryl Casone (@cherylcasone) September 26, 2013
As a Millennial, I reached out with my own questions, but unfortunately Casone didn't respond:
Today Fox & Friends ran the final — AND MOST IMPORTANT — segment featuring Cansone's expertly given job advice, specifically tailored to the 20-something set. The advice?
1. "STOP TALKING TRASH"
2. "YOU ARE HOW YOU'RE KNOWN"
In other words, don't talk shit behind your coworkers backs and maintain a good reputation so people want to work with you. This isn't bad advice, I guess, but the truly invaluable insight on Millennial employment actually came at the end of the segment and was entirely accidental.
"I have to really quickly thank Antonio and Charlie and AJ, as well," Cansone remarked. "Those were my actors and actresses this week. I paid them nothing."
Here's some real advice to my fellow millennials: your work is worth something so stop doing it for free.