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Things can get pretty rough and nasty when you attend a symphony performance, and Bainbridge Performing Arts in Washington is no exception. Earlier this month police ejected a woman from a show when she decided to scream her one word review — "Boring!" — during the performance. The woman's teenage daughter was performing, but the comment wasn't directed at her. And anyway, as she explained to police, "that was how things were" between her and her daughter. She was actually screaming at the new conductor, with whom she has a professional rivalry. It's good to see police are finally cracking down on these symphony brawls we're always hearing so much about. More »
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Sometimes I worry that my nail person hates me. Seeing as I get about five pedicures a year and don't have a salon to which I am loyal (meaning I don't even really have a "nail person"), I'm not sure exactly why I devote any time to being concerned about this. Regardless, I often spend the first 15 or 20 minutes of a pedicure (never a manicure, since having nail polish on my fingernails makes my hands feel like they can't breathe. Totally normal, right?) tied in knots. And most often, I'm busy worrying that my poor nail technician is disgusted by my leg stubble. More »
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This weekend I encountered one of the biggest assclowns I've ever met.  He is so assclown-y, in fact, that I would like the whole world to know. More »
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You were dumped. Or you dumped someone. Maybe you just can't find that new someone to love, or just make out with. Why not try online dating? We pulled our team of experts together to guide you. More »
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Thanks to Facebook and Twitter, our pool of professional connections is as expansive as our list of friends. While it's savvy to make use of your list of contacts when asking for a work-related favor, it's important to remember that your "friend" online is a more than just a pal when you're asking him or her for a professional favor. Here are some suggestions for the next time you shoot an email requesting help from someone you know (or someone who someone you know knows). More »
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An Atlanta man was recently arrested for grabbing some paper towels and defiantly blowing his nose in a MARTA station. To which I say: we need to turn our attention to the real criminals — the nail-clippers. More »
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Times of global disaster are ripe for hyper-social networking. Friends sound-off on their walls, and vigorously tweet and blog of impending doom and gloom. And all these updates raise a tough question: How do you respond? More »
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When I was little I used to have a pair of stuffed monkeys whose arms velcroed around each other. Back then, I thought it meant they loved each other. But maybe they'd just spent an evening together at someone's house and discovered they both kind of liked prog-rock. And were, you know, being polite. When did hugging become compulsory? More »
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The ubiquity of voicemail made sense when our phones lived in the kitchen, not our pockets—before SMS and twitter and the dozens of other ways we now stay perma-connected. So when does it make sense to use voicemail? More »
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I'm not talking butchering "Total Eclipse of the Heart" — that's what you're signing on for. No, these breaches of etiquette are far more heinous, and can ruin the experience for everyone around you. Take heed! More »
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Welcome to our new feature in which we tackle the challenges of human interaction. First up, we'll navigate the tricky waters of how to act when you're drunk, or the morning after you got wasted in front of everyone. More »
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Again with the intern mishigas! More »
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We've all wanted to do it. You didn't drop perfectly good money a decent bottle of plonk you could find only to have your hosts let it languish, ignored, to be guzzled without you. More »
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We've all been there: You go out on a date, it's meh, someone doesn't follow-up, the end...and then you run into each other. Without the drama of a hookup, the pain of an ex, how to handle this quotidian awkwardness? More »
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As a representative of the revered social grouping known as The Lesbians, at times a gay lady may find herself on the receiving end of some highly indelicate questions in regards to her personal life. More »
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Once, people used their hands to write words, words that went on pieces of paper. To formally show gratitude, people would put words on a particularly nice piece of paper in the mail. You sent a thank-you note. Simple. More »
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• Even beauty queens are feeling the pinch of the recession: CBS reports that many pageant contestants have been forced to wear their dresses more than once or, worst case scenario, sell their costumes. • More »
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Writer John Ptak has posted 1940s Ladies Home Journal piece that instructs young women on date conduct. The response of Ptak's 17-year-old daughter? "It was simply beyond listening to...and certainly not anywhere near worthy of a response." [LongStreet via BoingBoing] More »
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Obviously, we ordered this newly-reissued book immediately, eager for advice. Yes, Edward Gorey, the master of pen-and-ink, tackles what to say after Deflowerment-by-Marimba-Player, Deflowerment-on-Cross-Country-Bus, and, obviously, Deflowerment-at-Seance. But the modern age has wraught a whole new batch of dubious occasions: More »
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Existing in public space is full of annoyances - headphone spillage, loud talkers on cell phones, people who spit sunflower seeds on the floor of the Metro like animals in a barn. But who can ultimately judge what is rude? More »
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Design critic Stephen Bayley's smug Telegraph-framed assertion that "taking an educated pleasure in the shape and style of women is not belittling, it is elevating" smacks of Mad Men-style paternalism. But as a straight female girl-watcher, I sort of agree. More »
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If, by chance, you ever happen to run in to Mr. George Clooney, you might want to consider being on your best behavior, for as he tells the Daily Mail, the Silver Fox has no time for bad manners. More »
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Here, a handy compendium of bathroom etiquette for the gentleman in your life. Now we just need one for the office ladies' room...[BuzzFeed] More »
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I was recently at a fancy wedding, and within an hour, the bathroom was utter chaos. Because, bad citizens and sisters that we are, that's what we do. Here, a few misdemeanors we'd really like to excise from public bathrooms. More »
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Yesterday, Hortense Twittered, "I'd just like to give a shout out to everyone I work with for not telling me that I've had bagel crumbs on my face for the past 45 minutes." Fair enough! More »
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But...but, I was about to thank you! I always thank people! That's not who I am, I swear! That's not how I was raised! And now...you've ruined my day. More »
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“When I go through and mark up a menu, I’m not doing it to humiliate the person... I just want them to know so they don’t look uneducated." Is this persnickety dame a recession casualty? More »
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Burger King's bizarre “Whopper Sacrifice” campaign — which offered a free burger if you unfriended ten Facebook friends — has started a debate about the etiquette of giving people the online axe. More »
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In an interesting essay in the Sydney Morning Herald, Emily Maguire argues that not only have we lost our capacity for discretion, we resent it. Is oversharing the new etiquette? More »
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Genius idea: a website is allowing women to register the gowns they're wearing to inaugural balls so no one makes the faux pas of showing up in the same dress. We say: Thank. God. More »
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Today someone writes into the Philadelphia Inquirer's advice column, "Ask Amy," to ask how to deal with her hostess's tasteless fat-free cooking. Amy says suck it up. We respectfully disagree. More »
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• Boot porn: who knew that shoes could be this ugly and expensive? (The gems on the left cost $1,350. Yee haw!) • More »
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BoingBoing brings us a super-duper Oldie: 1912's Hygiene for the Worker. On work apparel, the tome instructs, "The type of waist known as the lingerie is one that the business girl should not wear in the office. It is neither sensible nor dignified. Nor is it an economy, for on account of its sheerness it requires greater care and expense in laundering ; hence, it is seldom washed as frequently as it should be. There is nothing more distasteful to the average business man than unclean finery." Also distasteful: the employer's insolent "inspection!" [BoingBoing] More »
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We typically utilize manners as a casual way to make others around us a little more comfortable. But there are certain occasions when we inexplicably feel it necessary to be polite to the point of our own discomfort. Like, when you're talking to someone, and they accidentally spit on you, and you don't wipe it off right away because, for some strange reason, it just seems rude. Meanwhile, you're unable to concentrate on what they're saying, because all you can think about is how you have someone's saliva dripping down your face. When it comes to embarrassing things like bodily functions, it seems we still haven't completely hammered out the rules of etiquette. Case in point: just last night, I was at a loss at what to do when I found myself sitting with one other person in a room that began filling up with an ungodly dense fog of stomach-turning gas - and they wasn't coming from me. More »
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We all know the traditional prohibitions against talking politics: avoid it when you can; don't get personal; find common ground. Thirty million etiquette books can't be wrong, and yet, today, when everyone's bursting with excitement and exaltation and triumph, the old rules don't seem to apply! How can anyone not want to talk about it, you think - how can anyone not be excited?! More »
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Emily Post's Etiquette came out in 1922 and quickly her name became synonymous with good manners. A new biography of the etiquette doyenne by Laura Claridge, reviewed in the current New Yorker, shows her to have been a scandal-surviving divorcee who played the banjo and worked as a professional writer in a time when well-bred women didn't. Claridge argues that by laying out the rules, Post gave new immigrants a template for assimilation that was essentially democratic. Whatever your interpretation, you gotta wonder if Post's rules of the road have any place in our uncouth world. More »
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The other day I got an invitation to a wedding that specified "Beach Festive," so today's Wall Street Journal piece on the stupid trend towards increasingly vague and creative dress codes was timely. Whereas most people find the distinctions between "black tie"," white tie" and "cocktail" quite daunting enough, the article claims that "it's no longer unusual to receive an invitation prescribing a dress code of "wild chic," "beach formal," "resort dressy," "international," "creative black tie" or "safari chic." And it doesn't stop there. We learn about such head-scratchers as "High Black Tie," "Ferrari Hot," "dressy resort" and the harrowingly vague "festive attire." Here, a cheat sheet: More »
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A Memphis high school principal publicly outed a bunch of gay kids when she posted a list of couples teachers had told her were "known couples" in hopes of shaming them out of making out in the hallways. And yes, that is mindbogglingly outrageous — as opposed to merely "sad," which is how I characterized it before I realized many of the couples had no public makeout history — but the ACLU is on it and I feel there is a more important matter at hand, because it is Friday, and a bunch of you are invariably going to be engaging in Public Displays of Affection tonight. And I'm okay with that. This morning I revealed that I had once been kicked out of a bar for making out. I like making out in bars and on street corners sometimes, because making out at home on your couch gets old and inevitably leads to fucking, and you can't run errands or get drunk while you're fucking. But sometimes I forget how it makes others feel. More »
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About ten of you have emailed from Esquire about the things a man should never do in the company of a woman, like cleaning your gun or talking about the girls you used to fuck or "rapping" or blow-drying their hair. It's fun but not incredibly accurate; most of the dealbreakers, like calling a girl a "whore" in a way that isn't a term of endearment, or tipping less than 20%, are things we wouldn't want guys to be doing in front of anyone, Supreme Being included. (Ditto for talking about past conquests: if you find his descriptions of getting laid off-putting, isn't that just a sign you probably shouldn't do him?) So we thought we'd alter the list and unisexify it. Is there anything you only do in the presence of God and maybe pets? Besides taking a dump, that is. We asked our friends! And weirdly, dudes and females alike all said the same thing: More »
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