During an Antibiotics-Fueled Twitter Rant, Khloe Kardashian Told Fans 'Get Off My Dick'

Khloé Kardashian claims a cocktail of antibiotics and painkillers caused her to pop off on Twitter last night. The New York Times best-selling author’s most incendiary comments were responses to tweets about her appearance and her marriage to Lamar Odom.

After she congratulated the Houston Rockets on a “dope ass game,” some of her followers responded with comments like “you can’t be with [James] harden and still be married fam, gotta chose one” and “for better or worse sickness and health till death do them part.”

Khloé presumably knocked back a few more Percocets and said:

“Went against all our vows”?? Oh dang—she burned Kat, Juan, and her sick husband in one tweet! And it didn’t even stop there:

Once those haters got off her dick, another one decided to hop on and insult her appearance for no reason.

“Ur head shaped like a deflated football,” he tweeted.

Khloé then went through like 9 days of Z-Paks in one gulp, and responded with what I think was a pretty sick burn:

But, like most good fun, this couldn’t last forever:

[Us Weekly]

Amy Schumer, who recently claimed that being famous blows, allegedly pulled a “YOU KNOW WHO I AM” after being denied entry into an NYC gym.

Reports Radar Online:

The trouble began when the actress forgot her membership card. An employee turned her away, reminding her she needed a card for entrance— which left the 34-year-old in a rage.

“She threw a massive fit,” an eyewitness tells Radar. “She screamed, ‘I know you know who I am, I’m famous!’”

After the employee was like, “Sorry lady,” Schumer stormed out—which, I think, counts as cardio.

[Radar Online]

This is a very funny headline without context. It’s less funny with it.

[Page Six]

Michael Lohan may have just had a heart attack. [TMZ]
Kate Beckinsale’s marriage is “on the rocks,” but I’m not sure which rocks. [TMZ]
One of Charlie Sheen’s exes on not being told he had HIV: “Meh.” [TMZ]
I still can’t believe that Cameron Diaz and Nicole Richie are sisters-in-law. [TMZ]
SOUND ALL THE ALARMS. SOMETHING ON KUWTK IS FAKE. [Radar Online]