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• For those of you expecting a week-long party to start off the Obama Administration, prepare to be disappointed. There will be one public event welcoming you to D.C. on Sunday afternoon. Monday will be a day of community service, and the Inauguration will occur on Tuesday out in the cold, followed by formal balls you're unlikely to get into without connections. But if you want to rent an apartment anyway, I have really nice towels. [Politico]
• Barack Obama plans to announce the appointment of Clinton-era EPA Administrator Carol Browner to be the White House Energy Coordinator (they hate the word "Czar" as much as we do) and Nancy Sutley, a deputy mayor of Los Angeles, to be a chair of the White House Council on Environmental Quality. Sutley will be Obama's first openly gay Cabinet appointment. [Politico]
• In the meantime, if you need some cheap electronics or office furniture, the McCain campaign has some they'll sell you cheap. [Washington Post]

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If the National Enquirer weren't relentless hyping its as-yet pictureless story about John Edwards' baby, we could just spend the whole morning talking about Republican hypocrisy, the new poster child for which is Alaskan Senator Ted Stevens. Good old Interwebs Ted was indicted on corruption charges, so we talk about that, his ass-grabbing Alaskan colleague (hint: it isn't Senator Lisa Murkowski), Olympic-sanctioned censorship, late apologies, Al Sharpton on the importance of admitting one's mistakes, and John Edwards' hush money that isn't hushing everything. God, it's like everyone's a hypocrite but me and Moe, and that might just be because nobody knows yet. More »
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• There's probably some economic metaphor to be had in a story about 13 people being trampled by bulls in Pamplona, but then again it might be a cautionary tale about what the tourism industry can convince you is "fun." [Washington Post]
• Speaking of a snow job, guess who is the latest politician calling for a withdrawal timetable in Iraq sooner rather than later? Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki, that's who. No worries, Bush and McCain will find other reasons not to withdraw yet. [Washington Post]
• Jim Webb, though, is totally withdrawing from VP consideration, though. [HuffPo]

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• Does someone have $38,001 they can loan me? Because film producer Barbara Broccoli paid $38,000 to charity to kiss Daniel Craig and, um, hell yeah. [AP]
• Speaking of bad loans, hundreds of people have been arrested for making them, including 2 Bear Sterns guys. The economic damage, well, no one knows how to fix that. [Washington Post]
• As previously mentioned, Barack Obama is foregoing federal campaign funding because he doesn't need your stinkin' money. Well, I mean, he needs your money, he just doesn't want the government to be the go-between. Who's small government now (that it benefits him)? [NY Times]
• Actually, for the record, one of the guys who wrote the law thinks it's a smart decision because Obama really, actually doesn't need the money. [HuffPo]

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Hey, so, Moe's locked out of her house and I get to write the intro, which means it'll be less stream-of-consciousness and more... something else, I don't know I haven't had any coffee but I'm definitely less hung over than yesterday and not nearly as screwed as Air Force Chief of Staff Gen. T. Michael Moseley and Secretary Michael W. Wynne who got fired yesterday because no one in the Air Force knows how to keep our nuclear technology safe or to themselves. We also parse PegNoo, talk about Crazy Dana Rohrabacher and his used underwear fetish, the Bridge to Nowhere, how to get out of nowhere, Lincoln and the syph, and how Moe is going to make her escape from Brooklyn (hint: it probably involves a bridge). All that is after the jump! More »
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