Did This Budweiser Commercial Just Make Me Feel Emotions?

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As I’m sure you’ve noticed, all the big fancy 2013 Super Bowl ads are trickling on to the internet this week—from the return of the E-Trade baby (AN ABOMINATION) to this hot lady making out with a nerd (fun fact: they blurred out the tongues on the Today Show). Now here’s another one. And, confession, it made me SLIGHTLY CRY.

In the ad, Budweiser teamed up with Stevie Nicks and a baby horse to trick you into buying beer by making you cry via horse-emotions. Classic marketing tactic. It’s an old, old story: Dude gives birth to baby horse; dude and baby horse become #1 most tender bronies; dude takes a nap in some sawdust and the horse is like “yo, what is this, go to bed”; dude sells his best friend into beer slavery all “Smell ya later, Charles!”; dude cries; [three years later]; dude goes to a parade and his old horse friend is there all prancin’ around in a beer parade; Charles breaks free of beer bondage and tramples wildly through the streets of Chicago on deadly iron-clad hooves; no one shoots that rampaging horse for some reason; dude and horse reunite; [abject weeping]. Fin.

Now, LOOK. It’s pretty clear that we’re being manipulated here. First of all, I don’t even think the horses really make the beer.

And second of all, I know this commercial is a cheap, schmaltzy corncake designed to rip out your heartstrings and deep-fry them and put them back in upside-down. I know it’s basically just a mathematical formula where you put in baby horses and tearful reunions and then desire-for-beer comes out. I get it. That said, I like the ad. It’s like Christian the Lion lite (and by the way, if you’ve never seen Christian the Lion, hurry up and launder ALL THE HANDKERCHIEFS):

I feel like it’s okay to be shamelessly manipulated by advertising as long as I’m conscious of the fact that I’m being shamelessly manipulated by advertising. Right? Anyway, it’s not like I’m going to suddenly start buying Budweiser. So joke’s on YOU, beer guys. I guess. Sob.

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