Let us ponder this rumor with a quietly shitting Eric Northman. If you've hung in there with True Blood this far, congratulations — you have the television stamina of a silverback gorilla, which I guess means you have a lot of stamina. Your dedication to a series that often oscillates between frenzied, nonsensical action and long periods of nothing happening might soon be rewarded, too, with an actual Eric Northman dong shot. Just kidding! The True Blood folks might have a movie kicking around in their reams of scripts that were too nuts for TV, at least according to Stephen Moyer's loose lips.
So, during a brief (and barely intelligible) red carpet interview at the Fort Lauderdale Film Festival premiere (glamor!) of a movie Moyer and his wife Anna Paquin produced called Free Ride, the actor who plays the show's least popular vampire (after Tara) was asked a chatty, throwaway question about what True Blood fans will do with themselves come the summer of 2015, when the series has run its course. Instead of just saying, "Aw, shucks, I hardly know!" and then flashing the fang dentures he wears to all public events just in case someone asks for a photo, Moyer said this:
I'm not sure about the summer of 2015, but if things go the way I'm hoping, there will be something to watch in the summer of 2016. Which we'll have an announcement about soon…ish. I cannot talk about it yet.
WHAT?? But you just did talk about it! Could this mean that there's a True Blood movie on the horizon? Not according to HBO, which reached out to Buzzfeed lickiey-split just to say that, huh, it hasn't heard about a True Blood movie and also, who is Stephen Moyer?
The verifiable good True Blood news from this week is that, if Instagram is any indication, Alexander Skarsgård appears to be returning for season 7, which might have otherwise proved unwatchable.