Jezebel: Coldplay

Charlie Sheen Completes Human-To-Meme Transformation In Record Time

Erin Gloria Ryan — Sun, 06 Mar 2011 10:30:11 EST

SNL opened with a skit of the man acting unhinged. Charlie Sheen broadcast himself acting unhinged. Everyone's Tweeting jokes about WINNING and tiger blood and being on a drug called Charlie Sheen. The actor separates from and then reunites with a woman he refers to as one of "the goddesses" within like five seconds. Something about his kids and custody and cocaine? Something about porn stars? America has a good laugh and half of what the man has said in the last week is so is now shorthand for "I AM DANGEROUSLY MANIC." Congratulations, Charlie Sheen. You are a human meme, like Mr. T minus the toughness and crime stopping. [TMZ and every single other celebrity centric publication] More »

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Will Not Tolerate Being Laughed At

Erin Gloria Ryan — Sun, 09 Jan 2011 10:30:07 EST

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are skipping the Oscars this year because Anne Hathaway's hosting. Like a humorless Wu Tang Clan for the next generation, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes ain't nothin' to fuck with. More »

Demi Lovato Snorted Coke "Like A Pro"

Dodai Stewart — Wed, 10 Nov 2010 09:00:00 EST

More on this in Midweek Madness: Life & Style is reporting that before she entered a treatment center, Demi Lovato had become a big fan of cocaine.

Famous Teen Mom Bristol Palin Dances Tonight

Dodai Stewart — Mon, 20 Sep 2010 09:00:00 EDT

Dancing With The Stars premieres tonight, and Bristol Palin (seen here with dancing partner Mark Ballas) took her son, Tripp, to rehearsals over the weekend.

Obamas To Appear On American Idol; Pamela Anderson Won't Appear In Baywatch

Megan Carpentier — Sun, 11 Apr 2010 10:30:00 EDT

American Idol; Pamela Anderson Won't Appear In Baywatch" alt="Click here to read Obamas To Appear On American Idol; Pamela Anderson Won't Appear In Baywatch" src="http://cache.jezebel.com/assets/images/39/2010/04/custom_1270993812204_ap100308038064.jpg"/>

Michelle Obama and Barack Obama taped a segment Wednesday for American Idol's "Idol Gives Back" episode Wednesday. They look almost this cute in a picture at the link. [Fox News]

Michael Lohan Says He'll "Remarry" Lindsay; Jesse & Friend Attack Paparazzo With Knife

Margaret Hartmann — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 19:30:00 EDT

In an interview Michael Lohan responded to Lindsay Lohan calling him her "ex-father" on Twitter saying, "maybe she's divorcing me today, but she'll remarry me once she gets her life back."

Dexter Star Battles Cancer; The Jolie-Pitts Donate $1M To Haiti

Dodai Stewart — Thu, 14 Jan 2010 09:00:00 EST

Dexter Star Battles Cancer; The Jolie-Pitts Donate $1M To Haiti" alt="Click here to read Dexter Star Battles Cancer; The Jolie-Pitts Donate $1M To Haiti" src="http://cache.jezebel.com/assets/images/39/2010/01/90989955.jpg"/>

Dexter star Michael C. Hall has announced that he has been battling cancer, but the treatment is finished and he is in remission.

Kidman Questioned About Scientology "Cult"; Kate Hudson & A-Rod Said To Split

Margaret Hartmann — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 19:40:00 EST

During a recent interview, BBC reporter Andrew Marr asked Nicole Kidman about "one of the things you haven't talked about before... Scientology - a lot of people would say it is a bullying cult." Nicole stammered, then said:

MTV Pulls Snooki Punch Scene From Air, Renee And Bradley Get Serious, And Russell Impresses Katy's Parents

Hortense Smith — Sat, 12 Dec 2009 10:30:00 EST

After a clip of Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi getting punched in the face went viral last week, MTV has decided to pull the scene from an upcoming episode of Jersey Shore, stating that what happened to Snooki was "disturbing." [E!]

Jon's Newest Girlfriend Resigns From Star; Channing Wants Depp To Play Her

Margaret Hartmann — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 18:30:00 EDT

Star; Channing Wants Depp To Play Her" alt="Click here to read Jon's Newest Girlfriend Resigns From Star; Channing Wants Depp To Play Her" src="http://cache.jezebel.com/assets/images/39/2009/07/custom_1248388292503_90714P7_GOSSELIN_B-GR_15.jpg"/>

Star reporter Kate Major resigned today after announcing that she's dating Jon Gosselin, as she wouldn't want this conflict of interest to tarnish the mag's stellar reputation. Too bad Michael Lohan won't stop talking about his new BFFs.

Madonna's Adopted Child Has A Posse

Dodai Stewart — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 09:00:00 EDT

Madonna has flown a nanny and a nurse to Malawi to look after Mercy while adoption papers and visas are being arranged. The deal's not done and the kid already has an entourage! [The Sun]

Ashton & Demi Want Susan Boyle; Marilyn Manson Cries Over Drugs

Anna North — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 18:30:00 EDT

A source claims that Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore want Susan Boyle to sing at their wedding anniversary party. Demi reportedly would also like Susan to "flash her knee" at Ashton. [Daily Express]

Gwyneth Paltrow's Son: Pop Culture Racial Profiler

Anna Holmes — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 18:20:00 EDT

Gwyneth Paltrow's son is acquiring a reputation for being a "sensitive thug". Not sensitive enough, however, to avoid racial profiling: As explained on the Tonight Show, Moses thinks that any white person singing a song must be his dad. More »

Brad & Angie Acting Like They Like Each Other Or Something

Dodai Stewart — Fri, 22 May 2009 09:00:00 EDT

ZOMG Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie partied past one am in Cannes! He drank Bailey's! She drank vodka! He had his hand on her leg! They laughed and whispered in each other's ears! [People]
Brad Pitt says:

Elton John Helped Eminem Through Rehab; New Book Reveals Streisand Romanced Co-Stars

Margaret Hartmann — Thu, 14 May 2009 18:30:00 EDT

Eminem says Elton John helped him fight his drug addiction. "He had a substance-abuse problem in the past. So when I first wanted to get sober, I called him," explains Em.

Drunk Fan Rushes Britney On Stage; Pattinson Has Penis Implant?

Dodai Stewart — Mon, 04 May 2009 09:00:00 EDT

A fan of Britney Spears rushed up on stage and tried to dance with Brit Brit on Saturday night in Connecticut. He was quickly surrounded by backup dancers and "escorted" away. There's video. [Perez]

The Ronsons Want Lindsay Restrained; Jessica Simpson Dropped From Label

Margaret Hartmann — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 18:30:00 EDT

Samantha Ronson's family is seeking a restraining order against Lindsay Lohan, and confirming some of the troubling rumors about Lindsay's habits.

Amy Winehouse Is Rough, Tough & In The Buff

Dodai Stewart — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 09:00:00 EDT

Being on vacation with Amy Winehouse must be relentlessly entertaining:

Amy Winehouse To Be Caribbean Queen

Dodai Stewart — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 09:00:00 EST

Amy Winehouse is househunting in St. Lucia!

Bristol Palin Will Have A Baby Boy!

Jessica G. — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 09:00:00 EST

The country's most famous teen mom, Bristol Palin, will have a boy around December 20th with fiance Levi Johnston. The as-yet-unnamed kiddie already killed a moose with his bare hands in utero. [Page Six]

The Strange Case Of The State Of Hilary Duff's Hymen

Jessica G. — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 09:00:00 EST

Hilary Duff told Elle she was a virgin back in 2006. The now 21-year-old actress is claiming she never said such a thing. More »

Bettie Page "Critically Ill" After Heart Attack

Hortense Smith — Sat, 06 Dec 2008 09:30:00 EST

Pin-up legend Bettie Page has been hospitalized after a heart attack she suffered on Tuesday. The 85-year-old Page is being held in the intensive care unit, and is "critically ill." [NYTimes]

The Pussycat Dolls are apparently "so excited" to open for Britney Spears on her Circus world tour. "The Pussycat Dolls can babysit Britney Spears' kids!" says lead singer Nicole Scherzinger. I'm sure Britney's lawyers are thrilled to hear it! [US Magazine]

Meanwhile, Britney is having a "love-hate relationship" with her boobs. "At the moment I hate them. I want them smaller," Spears says, "I'm tempted to have a breast reduction so I can slink into some amazing stage outfits for my next set of shows. I know they look sexy but sometimes they get in the way." It's like raaaaain on your wedding day! [DailyMail]

Katie Holmes Claims To Be In Control

Dodai Stewart — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 09:00:00 EST

Holy Xenu! Katie Holmes looks freakin awesome on the cover of T: The New York Times Style Magazine. She claims she is not the pawn of Tom Cruise: "There's a misperception about me that I just became this wallflower, this woman who doesn't have any control of her life. "And that's pretty wrong. From the very beginning, I've made choices in my life that have been very strong." Plus: "When I met Tom I was completely in love and, yes, I admired him growing up — he's Tom Cruise! When I met him, he was so warm and I thought, Wow! You can be a superstar and a human being. He made me feel so amazing." [People]
Another glamorous shot of Katie, and one of Tom Cruise, from T Magazine. [Pop Sugar]
Amy Winehouse has "escaped" from her hospital bed and went to a recording studio and a friend's house before returning to the hospital "in the early hours." Sneaky! [The Sun]
Alex Rodriguez speaks! About his relationship with Madonna! "We're friends – that's it. I've been to two [of her] concerts, yet I've read that I went to 20. I've also read that we were buying an apartment together. That is absolutely ridiculous and not true." [People]

Jessica Alba Is Shilling Booze With Post Baby Bod

Jessica G. — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 18:00:00 EST

Less than six months after giving birth to daughter Honor, Jessica Alba is is pimping Campari in her skivvies. [People]
First he loses the prestigious Sexiest Man Alive designation to Hugh Jackman, and now George Clooney is allegedly miffed because he wanted to direct Frost/Nixon but the honor went to Ron Howard. Frost/Nixon scribe Peter Morgan says, "I expect I will spend the rest of my life making amends to him - and my wife - and to everybody about my decision. Now I will never have him ringing me again, asking to do my work." [Daily Express]
Kanye West has "taken a very public fancy" to "glamour model" Sophie Howard. Howard, 25, won Loaded's Most Beautiful Breasts poll. She does sound like a winner. [Mirror]

What Will Cloris Leachman Do Next?

Dodai Stewart — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 09:00:00 EDT

Cloris Leachman was booted off of Dancing With The Stars. "I'm not leaving," she said. "I'm going to get a pretty costume and be here next week. I'm going to sit over there. I can't go home. Are you serious? This is a joke." [UPI]
Despite at first being told she was too old, Cloris might be Frau Blucher in Young Frankenstein on Broadway! Producer Mel Brooks originally told her she didn't have the "stamina" and said "We're afraid the show could kill [Leachman]. We don't want her to die onstage." [Page Six]
Dina Lohan on Dancing With The Stars? Just the kind of trainwreckery this country needs. [New York Mag]
Speaking of Lohans, Lindsay's former bodyguard has settled a lawsuit he filed against her. [TMZ]
This report claims that Lindsay has lost 14 pounds and is "thinner than ever." Really? She doesn't look the way she did when she was hanging with Nic Rich back in the day. [Boston.com]
By the by, Dina Lohan calls the reports of a Lindsay/America Ferrera feud on the set of Ugly Betty "just silly." She says: "America's a doll. And they said [Lindsay] brought a posse. It was my mother and myself, and [sister] Ali. It was not a posse. We had sushi and no one trashed the room." Dina does admit: "It was long hours and when you're on a movie set it's a lot different. She's not used to television, but it was fun." [People]
Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan in a sitcom together??? Sign, apocalypse. [News.com.au]

Mariah Carey E-Mails Vogue Editor From Honeymoon

Dodai Stewart — Wed, 07 May 2008 09:00:00 EDT

Vogue Editor From Honeymoon" alt="Click here to read Mariah Carey E-Mails Vogue Editor From Honeymoon" src="http://cache.jezebel.com/assets/images/39/2008/05/small_mariahhotlikefiyah050708.jpg"/>

[Mariah Carey] is very happy. I've spoken with her and she is superb. She is over the moon. I received an email from her [Monday] and she is so happy. She really sounds like someone on her honeymoon." — Andre Leon Talley. Talley also says the wedding happened so quickly he "didn't have the time to offer her any style tips!" Underminer. [People]

Anna Wintour: 1; Rachel Zoe: 0

Jennifer — Thu, 01 May 2008 11:30:00 EDT

OMG: Rachel Zoe has been disinvited from the Anna Wintour-hosted Metropolitan Museum of Art's Costume Institute Gala, taking place Monday night in New York. This is what you get when you tempt the gods and proclaim yourself more important than Vogue. [Fashion Week Daily]