Jezebel: Coffee

Caffeine Messes With Your Hormones Differently Depending On Your Race

Erin Gloria Ryan — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 18:20:00 EST

New research has found that young women who drink caffeinated beverages on the daily experience changes in hormone levels. How much will your Starbucks and Diet Coke addictions affect your chemical ladyhood? Like being arrested in Arizona, the way caffeine treats your lady hormones depends on your race. More »

Look, It's the Worst Bathroom Sign in the World!

Erin Gloria Ryan — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 19:45:00 EST

Bored with typical bathroom trope, one DC coffee shop has decided to skirt tradition and go with a mildly rapey bathroom sign that makes customers stop and say, "Wha?" More »

Coffee May Keep Uterine Cancer At Bay

Margaret Hartmann — Tue, 22 Nov 2011 23:55:00 EST

Researchers have discovered that women who regularly drink coffee may be less likely to develop cancer in the lining of their uterus. Possibly. But don't start drinking it if you aren't already! And definitely don't make it taste good. More »

Starbucks Will Now Sell You All Of Your Liquids

Cassie Murdoch — Sun, 13 Nov 2011 18:05:00 EST

Coffee megachain Starbucks has announced that it's paid $30 million (or the price of approximately ten trenta pumpkin spice lattes) to acquire high-end juice company Evolution Fresh. According to the Wall Street Journal, this is all part of it's plan to expand and achieve world juice domination: More »

Worth It: Coffee Brewed One Delicious Cup At A Time

Whitney Jefferson — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 15:35:00 EDT

Much unlike many a magazine editor who recommends you buy all sorts of crap that they most likely got for free, your Jezebel staff doesn't get jack shit (other than books, unsolicited). And that's how it should be. But on our own time, in our personal lives, we still buy stuff. So this is Worth It, our daily recommendation of random things that we've actually spent our own money on. These are the things we buy regularly or really like, things we'd actually tell our friends about. And now we're telling you. More »

Starbucks Terrified Climate Change Will Put Them Out Of Business

Lane Moore — Sun, 16 Oct 2011 16:55:00 EDT

For those of you who haven't yet found a reason to be worried about the effects of climate change, maybe this will work. More »

A Coffee A Day May Keep Your Crippling Depression Away

Margaret Hartmann — Tue, 27 Sep 2011 10:20:00 EDT

It's time for your monthly update on whether your favorite beverage is saving your life or killing you. Today the news is good: Researchers say women who drink several cups of coffee per day are less likely to become depressed. There's no time to come down with the blues when you're tweaked out of your mind on caffeine! More »

Second-Grader Combats ADHD With A Cup Of Joe

Whitney Jefferson — Wed, 07 Sep 2011 10:50:00 EDT

When her son Rowan was diagnosed with ADHD, Denver mom Christie Haskell was hesitant to sign her second-grader up for a prescription to Ritalin or Adderall. Wanted to avoid the negative side effects of said drugs, she researched other options online and came across a natural, yet controversial, cure for her son: coffee. More »

Is Your Caffeine Addiction All In Your Head?

Lane Moore — Sun, 04 Sep 2011 13:15:00 EDT

The more studies I read about how powerful the placebo effect is in every day life, the more I wonder if anything works or doesn't work or if we're all just in some scene in The Matrix but ANYWAY. More »

Men Sure Were Asshats To Their Wives In 50s Era Folgers Coffee Commercials

Whitney Jefferson — Sat, 03 Sep 2011 11:35:00 EDT

YouTuber Shaun Clayton gathered the worst parts of Folgers commercials of the 1950s and 1960s and put them together into a supercut. The result is a barrage of cruel husbands berating their mates for having the audacity to make a sub-par cup of coffee. It's too bad the possibility of time-travel is still pretty far off, because oh, the joy we would feel to be able to go back in time and say, "Make it your goddamn self." More »

You Should Also Feel Bad About the Coffee You Drink

Erin Gloria Ryan — Sun, 07 Aug 2011 17:04:00 EDT

Bad news, caffeine addicted do-gooders- that pricey fair trade coffee isn't as socially responsible as you think. More »

Coffee's Bonus Side Effect: Hours Of Hallucinogenic Fun

Margaret Hartmann — Tue, 07 Jun 2011 11:05:00 EDT

According to a new study, coffee can make you hallucinate. And we thought it couldn't get any better! Researchers at La Trobe University in Melbourne called the beverage, "the most commonly used psychoactive drug" and found that after consuming five cups people started to hear sounds that weren't there. 92 people were asked to listen to white noise after drinking a large amount of coffee, then told to listen for parts of the song "White Christmas." A researcher explained: More »

Everyday Life Causes Brain Bleeding

Anna North — Thu, 05 May 2011 17:30:00 EDT

Do you participate in such normal-people activities as having sex and "being startled?" If so, your brain is about to explode. More »

Does Coffee Help Sperm Get Going In The Morning?

Sadie Stein — Thu, 14 Apr 2011 16:28:00 EDT

Coffee's merits have been debated for centuries. Force for evil, or nectar of the gods? The word is still out. More »

My Doomed Romance With Coffee

Anna North — Fri, 08 Apr 2011 16:45:00 EDT

Scientists say genetics may explain some people's high caffeine consumption. And I'm pretty sure that some day, my genes will explain why coffee makes me crazy. More »

Six Coffees A Day Keep The Cardiologist Away

Erin Gloria Ryan — Sun, 13 Mar 2011 11:51:00 EDT

Drinking six cups of coffee may reduce you ladies to sweaty midmorning jittery paranoia, but it might also be benefiting your heart. More »

How To Make Better Coffee

lifehacker — Tue, 08 Mar 2011 17:08:00 EST

Like computers, coffee is complex, easy to sink money into, and attracts a vast swath of opinions. And like computers, there is a wise middle path you can walk to get top-notch coffee at home without spending MacBook-like money on brewing gear. [Lifehacker] More »

Starbucks To Begin Selling Individually Sized Coffee Vats

Erin Gloria Ryan — Sun, 16 Jan 2011 18:00:00 EST

Responding to what I can only assume is overwhelming consumer demand for MOAR COFFEE, Starbucks is going to begin selling its 31-ounce "trenta" size in US stores on May 3rd. America, fuck yeah! More »

Assange's OKCupid Profile Sounds Like Assange Sex Musings (Updated)

Irin Carmon — Mon, 13 Dec 2010 13:12:31 EST

It's not clear if the florid, self-aggrandizing OKCupid profile with Julian Assange's photo is legit. But it does sound an awful lot like the florid, self-aggrandizing entries, including about women and sex, in Assange's diaries around the same time! Updated. More »

Oprah Shills For McDonald's As Authentic Australian Hangout

Irin Carmon — Mon, 06 Dec 2010 12:11:39 EST

Oprah's excellent Aussie Adventure is all about cultural understanding. Such as: men are "blokes," women are "sheilas," and everyone likes to hang out in "hip" McDonald's. Wait, what? Hello, pay-for-play! More »

The Most Lucrative 46 Seconds Of Julia Roberts' Career

Jessica Coen — Wed, 01 Dec 2010 09:23:00 EST

She who eats, prays and loves has also been paid $1.5 million to appear in an Italian commercial for Lavazza coffee...in which she doesn't say one word. Though she does make three or four facial expressions, including "contemplative" and "joyous." More »

Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal: United by Caffeine Addiction

Lauri Apple — Sat, 27 Nov 2010 17:15:50 EST

First we hear about their visit to a Brooklyn cafe for some "maple lattes of love." Now they're reportedly in Nashville, Tennesee, caffeine-ing it up some more. Who is the influence? Let's go with Mr. Love and Other Drugs here. More »

10-Shot Cup Of Espresso Is "Pure Thunder"

Katie Luscombe — Wed, 17 Nov 2010 11:06:00 EST

You know what's not EXXXTREME enough? Your coffee. So one Brooklyn coffee shop has decided to remedy that in an unprecedented way with the Dieci, a 10-shot, 20 oz. drink of pure espresso. And it makes Activia look weak. More »

Starbucks Explores Possibility Of Selling Beer & Wine

Margaret Hartmann — Tue, 19 Oct 2010 09:23:00 EDT

A Starbucks in Seattle has started selling local wine and beer in an effort to increase evening business. If it succeeds, future stores may serve more food items like cheeses and cured meats and feature seating at the barista bar. More »

Coffee Aphrodisiac Causes Sexy Bouts Of Dizziness

Margaret Hartmann — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 14:20:00 EDT

The FDA is warning consumers not to drink Magic Power Coffee, which supposedly provides "increased arousal" and "a stimulating buzz." Marketers failed to mention that it also causes dangerously low blood pressure, leading to dizziness and lightheadedness. [AP via Consumerist] More »

In Defense Of Cheap, Crappy Coffee

Sadie Stein — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 13:40:00 EDT

Coffee culture is taking over, and the cult of fine coffee is now a mass obsession. So why do I only like the bad kind? More »

Tricks Of The Trade

Katy Kelleher — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 12:40:00 EST

Coffee snobs would like you to know that your cup o' joe is probably crap. Or just "good." But don't worry, you can "camouflage the defects" in your non-Starbucks branded brew (yup, they got top scores) by adding milk. [NYPost] More »

Tea & Sympathy

Sadie Stein — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 17:20:00 EDT

A new study finds that tea or coffee really does taste better when sipped from your favorite mug: our brains are trained to associate certain rituals with pleasure. [Daily Mail] More »

Coffee More Potent for Joes

Margaret Hartmann — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 13:45:00 EST

Caffeine has a greater effect on men than women, and its effects start just ten minutes after it is drunk, according to a new study. More »

In Which We Pretend To Be Morning People

Jessica G. — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 18:00:00 EST

The staffers here are a surly, stinky lot, so it's no surprise that not one of us is a morning person. So when we saw Slate's Michael Agger on a quest for the perfect morning routine, we were intrigued! Is it possible for us to somehow turn our coffee drenched early hours into models of health and productivity? Agger outlines the routine of Leo Babauta of Zen Habits: "1. Wake at 4:30 a.m. 2. Drink water. 3. Set 3 Most Important Things (MITs) for today. 4. Fix lunches for kids and myself. 5. Eat breakfast, read. 6. Exercise (run, bike, swim, strength, or yardwork) or meditate. 7. Shower. 8. Wake wife & kids at 6:30 a.m." Um…yeah. That's ideal if you're a solar powered robot maybe. Want to know what our morning routines look like? Check them out, real and imagined, after the jump. More »

2 Breasts, 1 Cup

Maria — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 09:20:00 EDT

Uh oh: A new study claims that drinking a lot of coffee reduces the size of many women's breasts. The reduction in size is the result of a specific gene that half of women possess. But you know what? We'd rather have a reduction in cup size in our bras than one for our morning brew. [UPI] More »

McDonald's Commercial Paints Women As Dumb Poseurs

Dodai Stewart — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 16:30:00 EDT

There's a new McDonald's commercial (which comes to our attention via a reader tip) called "Intellectuals." It begins with two women "reading" newspapers in an upscale, Starbucksian-establishment. The first woman says, "You know, I heard McDonald's is making lattes now." The other woman says: "McDonald's? Well that's just…it's fantastic!" Woman 1 replies: "Now we don't have to listen to jazz all day long!" Woman 2 concurs: "I can start wearing heels again!" Eventually, one woman admits, "I don't know where Paraguay is!" Get it? They're sick of pretending to be classy, café-loving intellectual ladies. They want to be "regular" American women! In other words, they want to be idiots. More »

The First Interview? Verdict: Palinful

Megan Carpentier — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 10:00:00 EDT

Sarah Palin gave a little interview that aired yesterday, did you hear? Or even watch? It's okay, because Moe and I did, and we eventually talk about it, once we get done marveling at the foreign policy influence of Typewriter Man Martin K. Tytell and Thailand's political crisis, which leads us into a discussion of the important of overall GDP versus per capita GDP which causes Moe to call me a retarded Republican despite having had her morning coffee. See what listening to Sarah Palin sputter on about the Bush doctrine can do to you? More »

Legal Grounds

Dodai Stewart — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 13:20:00 EDT

Have you heard about the case of Tamara Klopfenstein? She was hired to be a receptionist/data entry clerk. After working for a few weeks, her (male) bosses asked her to get their coffee for them. She declined, and her manager e-mailed her, saying: "This is not open for debate. Please don’t make an easy task a big deal." Klopfenstein felt that getting coffee "reinforced outdated gender stereotypes," so the next day, when she was asked to get coffee again, she sent an e-mail that read: "I don't expect to serve and wait on you by making and serving you coffee every day." Nine minutes later, she was fired. Klopfenstein promptly sued the company for sexual discrimination and sexual harassment. The judge ruled: "The act of getting coffee is not, by itself, a gender-specific act," and dismissed the case. But Klopfenstein's attorneys argue that "Some tasks are inherently more offensive to women." As one site points out, "Getting coffee, much like sexualizing women by making them wear short skirts or heels, is undeniably a way that men in male dominated workspaces have demeaned women, putting them in their place as servants or housewives (or sex objects) as opposed to professionals." One one hand, you've got to wonder if a male receptionist would be asked to fetch coffee. On the other hand, don't most jobs include things not listed in the job description? [Classical Values, Feminist Law Professors] More »

Right Now Is About When I Shoot People Who Tell Me They're Worried About Their "Caffeine Addictions"

Moe — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 17:00:00 EDT

You know what I fucking hate? (And yeah this is tangentially related to a substantive news report regarding the topic that you can read if you like to, you know, learn facts.) Moving on I hate people who tell me they're trying to cut back on caffeine. People who will stand around being all drowsy and shit because they're trying to detox from coffee. Seriously, fuck those people. They always make a big deal out of it because, duh, people who haven't had their coffee have a lot to make excuses about, but like, you seriously expect my empathy? You expect my empathy and caffeine is your addiction? Sure, Starbucks with its 400 milligram Ventis has hooked unprecedented numbers of Americans on unprecedented quantities of caffeine. And LOOK AT THE SOCIETAL CONSEQUENCES! Like how America suddenly has a burgeoning employment sector that doesn't consist of "taking care of sick people"!! Because, guess what, coffee doesn't do anything especially bad! It actually turns out to prevent skin cancer and certain autoimmune disorders and shooting yourself in the temple just to put an end to the misery of having to get out of bed every 24 hours! More »

Brigitte Bardot Is A Racist; Churchgoing Girls Are Apple Polishers

maria — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 17:30:00 EDT

• Sure, yesterday was Black Day, but it was also Cake and Cunnilingus Day! • A blind man stabbed his fiancee for not wearing her engagement ring. • Mothers experience less eating problems than their drunk and childless peers.• The "D.C. Madam" was found guilty of prostitutin'. • Famous Muslim-hater, Brigitte Bardot, is on trial again for racist slurs. • The girls involved in a playground beatdown of a 10-year-old girl may face expulsion from school. • Gay couples are having trouble obtaining divorces. • Saudi female students and housewives plan Olympic dreams with controversial basketball team. • Social Darwinism? Girls who attend church religiously, are (possibly) harder workers. More »

Oprah Makes Oz A Star; Girl Gangs In Central America; Why Men Are Idiots

maria — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 16:40:00 EDT

Ed Note: We hear about and see so many stories that we can't find the time to comment on that we're gonna try something new: "Leftovers", a daily "accounting" of the stuff we had to leave behind. Let us know if you like it, and, obviously, feel free to click through on the stories and flesh them out for everybody.

More PhotoShop Of Horrors...

Moe — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 14:20:00 EST

What the fuck is this? It's an ad for coffee products. Perhaps they are fucking with us, because coffee is an addictive drug and therefore they could make an ad with coffee beans shooting out of Bob Dole's anus and you would still have to buy it? Or do Stella coffee products have special hallucinogenic properties? (Click tag to make it SCARIER.) [Copyranter] More »

Coffee: Causes Miscarriage, Helps Ovaries, And Makes You Fat

Jessica G. — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 09:30:00 EST

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Okay, remember the reports earlier this week that coffee and caffeine can terminate a pregnancy and protect ovaries from cancer? Well, news reports today suggest that all that java is making women fat. A report issued by British consumer watchdog group Which? says that "a Starbucks large white chocolate mocha with whipped cream and made with whole milk was found to contain 628 calories - nearly a third of the recommended daily amount for women." (Emphasis ours.) More »

Just in time to bring a jolting halt to...

Moe — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 14:45:00 EST

Just in time to bring a jolting halt to the pregnancy you can't afford to go through with in a recession, Starbucks is experimenting with selling $1 cups of coffee. (Oh wait, that was offensive. Sorry.) Whatever, the $1 cups of coffee are the oft-discussed, rarely-seen "short" cups that, at 8 ounces, were not that popular before they were taken off the menu in the late nineties to make way for the "venti." They're also planning on giving free refills on some drinks. Meanwhile in San Francisco, some representative of the other side of the widening income gap brings you a $20,000 coffee maker. [WSJ] More »